How to make new life long friends?

[Acrylic Snow]

I just feel like that I'm at a point in my life that's really...non-eventful, lagging, and not much sense of direction. I don't really have many friends. (And I mean REAL close friends. All that I have are like 3-4 peeps from grade school as far back as 2nd grade) And I do love them very much and am grateful for them...but I still want to branch out and start making new groups of friends.

 

I noticed that my close friends have their own circles of friends that they've been able to develop. (Though of few of them have the same problem that I have) Pretty much when life gets busy and everyone has to work or are busy being moms or get really engrossed in their working lives... it gets really lonely. (My family NEVER goes on vacations of anything either, so that part is pretty uneventful and a whole other story...)

 

At the moment I work at an animal clinic and I have been able to make friends there (even to the point where I would be invited to go over to their houses and hang and sometimes out to restaurants and etc) but they have all been friends for years so I feel left out. Doesn't help that I'm pretty shy and quiet (though I open up to my silly self after a LONG passage of time) They also go on outings together without inviting me a lot and I don't want to be intrusive by asking if I can tag along.

 

I'm also 24 years old and still live at home. (I graduated from UH last December) I took a detour from my degree because it had been bothering me if I would like being a Vet Tech more than design/art/computer tech. I've been at this job a year now and I think I've found my answer...its not for me. (THe low pay and lack of benefits was part of what killed it for me. Thought I would love animals and their well-being enough to where it wouldn't bother me) so recently I put a down payment to start a teaching certification program (either will teach Art, Special Education, or Technology Applications) and have been doing coursework for that...so money and stuff is really short (also pay student loans and other expenses)

 

I also got out of a 3 1/2 year relationship last April. I think when you're in relationships they kind of distract you from areas of your life that you should be working on. I think I tried to make him fill all those areas of being my best friend and lover that it seemed pointless to really go out and still try and make new friends. So once that all ended, I realized that my life (on my own) was pretty bland and lacking...life? Lol. The relationship helped me avoid the family issues (and other personal issues) i was going through...suddenly I had to face them head on. And alone.

 

Sigh. I don't know. This post has kinda turned into a vent about everything rather than just about making friends. Sorry, lol...

 

But I just feel really lost in life and it makes me anxious and stressed and irritable. I want to go out and make new friends (ones that will be long term) but I'm afraid I'm not "interesting" enough to really keep new friends around. I'm really just that "nice girl" whose willing to help out with things when needed. But past that I dunno if anyone sees anything else worthwhile (outside my close friends)

 

If anyone understands or gets anything out of my ramble of a post here, any experiences or advice you can conjure up would be greatly appreciated ^^

[bob the brave]

I don't think we make life-long friends, we find them.

 

Just get out more to increase your odds.

[todreaminblue]

i also agree that you find them or they find you and just something feels right...i dont expect to make life long friends...all my life long friends have been the ones to approach me....because they have noticed me i tend to stand apart from groups of people.......i guess i am easy to approach that way......i am unlikely to invite myself along...i wait to be invited......

 

 

i remember sitting down the end of my driveway when i was a teen, and there was teen twin brother and sister(six years or so older than me) who would catch the same bus as me......they would wait at the bus stop across the road i would sit at the end of my driveway on my school port directly opposite and preten like i didnt notice them i would read or fidn soemthign else to look at ...lol... i thought if i went up they would move away .and i liked listening to their conversations they were always bagging each other out but it was really affectionate..lol..it was cute....eventually they waved me across and said......why dont you sit with us.....why do you sit over there....i said i was just waiting for you to ask me to come over......we became friends.......i cant help the way i am and the life long friends i have accept me......jus tbe who you are and keep doing what you are doing they will find you or you will fidn them one day...my friends balance me out.....with logic and normalcy....lol...smilin.....deb

[jacksonvillae]

Look into local social networks that specifically target folks who are trying to make new friends. Such organizations host group activities, from cocktail mixers to a shared day on the slopes.