Eternal Sunshine Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 If you send a male friend a happy birthday text and he doesn't respond, not even to say thanks, do I have a right to feel somewhat offended? Or is that an over-reaction? It is not someone I am dating but it is someone I am interested in so I wasn't sure where to put this thread. I am kind of pissed about no response Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 Being offended seems to imply some kind of right to feel that. But if you're not dating, and he doesn't know how you feel, then, no, I think while it's a bit 'off', there's no point - or dare I say it, justification - in being offended. People are like that. Maybe he received so many, he lost count and didn't realise you were awaiting a reply or acknowledgement. You get a load of 'happy birthdays' on FB. A general thanks is more usual than an individual response to everyone. I think the same may apply here. Sometimes, you can't thank everyone...... Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 If you send a male friend a happy birthday text and he doesn't respond, not even to say thanks, do I have a right to feel somewhat offended? Or is that an over-reaction? It is not someone I am dating but it is someone I am interested in so I wasn't sure where to put this thread. I am kind of pissed about no response I understand. You have the right to feel any way you want of course. Unfortunately I have the tendency to cut men out like that when they don't respond. I don't care when it's a friend but if it's an interest then clean slate is better. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Eternal Sunshine Posted May 29, 2013 Author Share Posted May 29, 2013 I understand. You have the right to feel any way you want of course. Unfortunately I have the tendency to cut men out like that when they don't respond. I don't care when it's a friend but if it's an interest then clean slate is better. So do I. I am crossing him over my "potential interests" list. I definetely wouldn't care if my interest in him was purely platonic. But it's not and I do care I won't show it of course, I will be pleasant and polite when I see him next. The change will happen inwardly. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 So do I. I am crossing him over my "potential interests" list. I definetely wouldn't care if my interest in him was purely platonic. But it's not and I do care Yeah, shame but it is what it is. I won't show it of course, I will be pleasant and polite when I see him next. The change will happen inwardly. I'm the same. Just lose their number, take them of facebook, etc and done. He might still get back to you of course soon enough. Link to post Share on other sites
CherryT Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 No offence, but on birthdays people generally get flooded with messages on social media, emails or texts. I wouldn't take it so seriously. Also he may not know you have an interest in him. I know for certain, I didn't respond to every single message. I tried, but when my birthday is on a weekday, I'm also at work and just can't get around to responding to every single greeting. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 No offence, but on birthdays people generally get flooded with messages on social media, emails or texts. I wouldn't take it so seriously. Also he may not know you have an interest in him. I know for certain, I didn't respond to every single message. I tried, but when my birthday is on a weekday, I'm also at work and just can't get around to responding to every single greeting. If he can't differentiate between her messages and the others' then there is nothing for her to do. It's not about whether he knows that she is interested, it's whether he is interested. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 How old is this guy? I've texted fewer times than I have fingers in my entire life, and check fb about once a month. Unless I have something better to do. Could be a factor. Link to post Share on other sites
fortyninethousand322 Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 Back in college, the girl I "dated" sent me a birthday text message. I was upset with her because I felt like she was playing games with me (she was). So I didn't answer. I'm sure she didn't realize that's why I ignored the text. She called me and of course I answered and of course I continued to see her anyway. It's easier to ignore a text than a phone call or an actual person. Maybe he didn't get the text or maybe he's upset with you for some reason that makes no sense to you. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 No offence, but on birthdays people generally get flooded with messages on social media, emails or texts. I wouldn't take it so seriously. Also he may not know you have an interest in him. I know for certain, I didn't respond to every single message. I tried, but when my birthday is on a weekday, I'm also at work and just can't get around to responding to every single greeting. Pretty much my point too.... Link to post Share on other sites
oriole man Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 If you send a male friend a happy birthday text and he doesn't respond, not even to say thanks, do I have a right to feel somewhat offended? Or is that an over-reaction? It is not someone I am dating but it is someone I am interested in so I wasn't sure where to put this thread. I am kind of pissed about no response if hes hot, hes gotten 300 messages. no obligation to respond. Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 Even when I'm sailing in the middle of the sea somewhere with intermittent reception I have no trouble responding to the man I'm interested in.... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
oriole man Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 Even when I'm sailing in the middle of the sea somewhere with intermittent reception I have no trouble responding to the man I'm interested in.... you drop everything to respond to him? don't expect that in return. Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 ES, is this guy even aware that you're interested in him? Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 you drop everything to respond to him? don't expect that in return. Since we're talking about Emilia here, I'd expect it in return. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 you drop everything to respond to him? don't expect that in return. I don't drop everything but I respond in a timely fashion. Maybe you should. Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 Since we're talking about Emilia here, I'd expect it in return. thanks. Link to post Share on other sites
oriole man Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 I don't drop everything but I respond in a timely fashion. Maybe you should. i'm doing just fine. i'll be having sex with my third new hot girl this week. Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 i'm doing just fine. i'll be having sex with my third new hot girl this week. Oh I'm sure you are. While posting on LS Link to post Share on other sites
oriole man Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 Oh I'm sure you are. While posting on LS jealous? i can walk and chew gum. Link to post Share on other sites
CherryT Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 If he can't differentiate between her messages and the others' then there is nothing for her to do. It's not about whether he knows that she is interested, it's whether he is interested. I didn't say that she should do something. All I said was she could be overreacting. They are not dating so he has no obligation to respond and I think him knowing whether or not she is interested is semi important. If some guy friend of mine, whom I'm not dating and have only hung out with, sends just a "Happy Birthday" text and I had no idea they were interested in me... Chances are, I might not respond. I'll probably do a mass "thank you" and group them in with the rest of my friends. However, if he did know she was interested and they went on a date in the past and didn't care to respond, then perhaps she has the right to be a bit offended if she thought a relationship was progressing. But if he has no idea that she likes him, they've never been on a date, and she's just prospecting the idea of wanting to hang out with him more... then yes, I'd say she's overreacting. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted June 2, 2013 Share Posted June 2, 2013 If you send a male friend a happy birthday text and he doesn't respond, not even to say thanks, do I have a right to feel somewhat offended? Or is that an over-reaction? It is not someone I am dating but it is someone I am interested in so I wasn't sure where to put this thread. I am kind of pissed about no response Maybe bdays are not that important to him. Anyway, when you do something nice for someone, sure it would be nice to get a thanks, sometimes it doesn't happen. Maybe he got it and couldn't reply back, thought he would later and then forgot. Don't make a big deal of it though.. Link to post Share on other sites
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