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Caught between Two friends


Savannah323

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Savannah323

Hi,

 

Thank you in advance for reading this thread. I would like your input on the the following situation:

 

Background: About 9 months a group a friends (myself included) took a trip to Las Vegas to celebrate my friend's "I" b-day. Well, the short version of the story is that the other 2 girls (referring to "M" & "S") that accompany us did not want to participate in day activities (e.g., shopping, spa, pool) and chose to gamble instead of attending the birthday party hosted by the b-day girl in a club. Conclusion, the birthday girl and I ended up celebrating her b-day together. B-day girl was completely disappointed.

 

Fast-forward 9 months (present): "I" (former b-day girl) and I booked an abroad trip. I mentioned the trip and "M" decided she wanted to go to. She asked for my booking agency and I gave her the info. She booked the same trip as "I" and "me". Well, "I" found out and was not pleased. She was upset because she dislikes "M" due to her actions in Las Vegas (leaving her alone on her b-day).

 

"M" had no clue that "I" dislikes her due to "I" communicating with her afterwards and not addressing what happened in Las Vegas.

 

Well, "I" was upset that "M" was going to trip and confronted me. Although "M" had separate accommodation, our tour is escorted so we would ended up at the same places at the same time as a group.

 

I felt so caught up between these two. "I" has a strong dislike with "M" that was never address. She does not want "M"'s presence in this trip. She believes its exclusive (to us) no tag-alongs.

 

I had to address these situations. I told "M" why "I" is upset and how I felt, referring to the stress of being caught between them. "M" argued that she would not hang out with us or talk to us and she did not know there was friction between them. I agree she didnt. Occassinally, they do speak and joke around.

 

I agree that if "M" has money to purchase a trip she can go wherever she likes. Also, I don't see why we have to pretend to be strangers in this trip! I feel that this trip is open to whoever. Anyway, "m" changed her trip. She will not be going.

 

This was the most awkward moment in my life. Telling a friend that a friend does not like you. I am truly disappointed in "I"'s reaction. Not willing to give "M" a chance. Why the heck did I get drag into this? Did "I" overact? Should "M" had apologize for not attending "I" b-day party because that was the intended purpose of the trip? I refuse to pick sides. Thoughts?

 

Did

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Thoughts?

 

IMO, "I" and "M" can work out their juvenile issues outside of your presence. If *either* of them make you uncomfortable about this, go off and do your own thing, clearly explaining why ('they be acting like children instead of adults and you refuse to be put in the middle').

 

"M" overstepped by inviting herself along on the trip. You really don't mind but "I" does. "I" overstepped by throwing you under the bus, as you had nothing to do with "M" inviting herself. Classic triangulation. Cut them both off. If they can't deal with it like mature adults, they're not healthy friends IMO.

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