OriginalPenguin Posted July 5, 2011 Share Posted July 5, 2011 As I get older I have realized that true friends are really hard to come by. Sure there are a lot of acquaintances but not many people that are the real thing. I know one friend in particular, actually him and his wife, that I have known for a little over 20 years. They do not have many friends and I didnt even really like them much at first but over time we have been through a lot, done things for each other and become quite close. Lately we have gotten distant and I noticed that if I am not the one to initiate contact then I never seem to hear from them. At all. Being busy with other things I have not called recently and I got an email that sort of ticked me off; it was along the lines of "WTF is going on, we dont hear from you any more why are we getting the silent treatment. This left me feeling flat and my first thought was "Hey, I am not the only one with a phone here why do you assume it is some sort of silent treatment?. You could call me ya know, instead of getting all huffy and defensive for no reason and assuming the worst". Makes me wonder, just because I have known somebody for a long time does not necessarily mean they are friends and just because they are a part of my past does not mean they are going to be a part of my future. *scratch head* Link to post Share on other sites
Teknoe Posted July 5, 2011 Share Posted July 5, 2011 Makes me wonder, just because I have known somebody for a long time does not necessarily mean they are friends and just because they are a part of my past does not mean they are going to be a part of my future. *scratch head* One of my favorite TV shows of all time is Home Improvement. And one of my favorite HI episodes of all time was a gem called "For Whom The Belch Tolls" (it was season 1 or season 2). It was about Tim Allen's old best friend coming back to town for a romp or two. Tim found it hard to connect to Stu Cutler today, but used his history with Stu as a means to carry on, even though clearly, both their lives had changed (Tim = family man, Stu = crazy bachelor stuck living in the past, his glory college days). Wilson, Tim's incredibly wise neighbor, gave Tim this wonderful piece of advice, and I think it applies to you 100%: "Tim, is Stu your best friend of 15 years.... or was he your best friend, 15 years ago?" So simple, yet so profound. I hope this helps in some way Link to post Share on other sites
Author OriginalPenguin Posted July 7, 2011 Author Share Posted July 7, 2011 if it feels wrong cut em loose, you have one life to live That's sort of the way I am leaning... "Tim, is Stu your best friend of 15 years.... or was he your best friend, 15 years ago?" So simple, yet so profound. I hope this helps in some way That's fantastic! It does help, thanks for that. Link to post Share on other sites
janica Posted July 9, 2011 Share Posted July 9, 2011 In most cases after you have been very good friends, the years apart does not matter. Even after you meet again after 15 years, you'd just pick up from where you left off. The true meaning of good friends is defined by chemistry. Something you dont have to work hard to try to maintain. You are always good friends. Link to post Share on other sites
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