catseye Posted September 24, 2003 Share Posted September 24, 2003 I'm just really emotional. I saw my ex-best friend from high school, we met in grade eight and stopped talking after high school. I haven't seen her in over 10 yrs, the other night I was in a local cafe, and she was at the counter and we both recognised each other. I froze, we both didn't saw anything, it was really hard, at one time we were best friends, and now we could care less if the other person was even alive! I have really good, solid, caring friendships now, but it chokes me that someone who was a friend, and shares soo many high school memories with me, could turn out to be so indifferent. We drifted apart after high school, talking less frequently and then just stopped, we weren't really getting along, she started hanging out with her new friend from university. It's a fact of life right, friendships end, but it's just a really hard and cruel fact of life in my opinion, because hopefully good friends would try to mend a friendship instead of just ending it. I find I trust my guy friends more now, friendships with girls tend to get competitive, and catty, in that the supports conditional. Link to post Share on other sites
2SidestoStories Posted September 24, 2003 Share Posted September 24, 2003 Not at all knowing what may have happened with your former friend, I'm going to venture to suggest that you perhaps attempt to rekindle the friendship ?? If it upsets you so very much, there may be unresolved things for both of you. At very least, perhaps you could have closure with her. Invite her out somewhere neutral and offer to hash everything out. I know how strange it can be to run into someone for whom you may have had deep feelings of friendship (or otherwise) at one time, without ever having actually had that closure I mentioned. It's a tough road to travel! My sympathy is with you, whatever the outcome. Link to post Share on other sites
serenity Posted September 26, 2003 Share Posted September 26, 2003 i know how sad that can be -- i have run into my old school pals in town and we jus said the uncomftable hello and hows things and at tiems i think it would have been easier if we ignored each other -- we all grow up and move in different directions - each day throws new opportunitys at us and unfortunetly sumtimes we just move on...its the way life is .... why didnt u smile or say hello to her? it takes 2 i know but sumone has to make the effort? Link to post Share on other sites
Kelebek Posted September 27, 2003 Share Posted September 27, 2003 Wow, that must have been such a shock. But you didn't say anything to her, and describe yourself as emotional, and you sound really upset........She didn't say anything either, yet you describe HER as indifferent. What if she's emotional and thinks YOU were indifferent towards her? Just a thought, maybe I'm completely wrong. Like 2SidesToStories said, you didn't specify how the friendship ended. It'd be easier to advise what to do if we knew if it ended in animosity, or simply drifting apart. If you simply drifted apart, say hello if you bump into her again. I bet the connection would show itself. Take care Link to post Share on other sites
catseye Posted September 29, 2003 Share Posted September 29, 2003 Thanks for all of your thoughts. I was upset, but I'm less upset now. We were pretty good friends during junior high, grade 8 onwards, but starting in grade 12 there were probs, she wasn't doing too well academically, and she had some health problems. We weren't really getting along. We kept in touch after high school for a couple of years but just over the phone, she didn't want to do things in person, she just went to college and then went home, I went to a different college so we didn't see each other at school. I never really knew her very well, she was a very closed person, she kept her thoughts and feelings to herself, I was a little like that as well, but I've mellowed as I've aged, I prefer letting others know what's happening with me, and to get their opinions or just support. In a lot of ways, I've changed for the better. I guess I would have liked the chance to have just talked to her, to let her know that I don't resent/dislike her anymore, to not have this huge akwardness/distance between us, like we aren't even speaking. Neither of us chose to say hello. But all of that is water under the bridge now, if I do run into her again, I think I will say hello at least. Seeing her dredged up all of these old memories, and my high school reunion was this year so I was thinking about high school anyhow. Link to post Share on other sites
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