Shyguy92 Posted January 4, 2011 Share Posted January 4, 2011 Ok so I have not had a girlfriend yet, and I am currently talking to this very nice girl all the time now on the computer, and I know her in real life so don't worry about that. She also usually contacts me first, and some more information is that I am not the most attractive guy, in fact, I am pretty in secure, but this girl keeps on talking to me. She has only dated one guy, ans she is 17, and she had a bad break up with him too, but that was a while ago. Anyway, we hardly ever talk in class, because I am just too shy and insecure to man up and talk to her, but we talk for hours all the time on msn messenger and facebook, and she always insists on video chatting with me even though i dont have a cam, she always just shows me herself. Anyway we also talk very flirty and dirty sometimes but its always bundled with the token "lol" and "haha jk" Also people that i have talked to think she is ugly, and I DISAGREE WITH THEM TOTALLY. She just seems like a 10 to me for some reason, and she doesn't think she is attractive at all. Sorry for the book, but I felt this info was necessary So basically I am just wondering, If i should continue to talk to her like this, and what should I do to get her to be attracted to me, emotionally that is. Link to post Share on other sites
PillaStoof Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 Try talking to her in person. Girls dig that like you wouldn't believe! I am attracted to guys much more when they are brave enough to talk to me..it makes me feel special. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Shyguy92 Posted January 5, 2011 Author Share Posted January 5, 2011 well i dont think it matters anymore because we had a long talk and then she was asking me why i liked her, and i told her cuz of a lotta reasons, some i couldnt explain, and that she is just so pretty and nice, and she said pretty and nice? Then she said shes sorry for leading me on and she feels like a terrible person so now i just wanna kill myself Link to post Share on other sites
Author Shyguy92 Posted January 5, 2011 Author Share Posted January 5, 2011 ok sorry for that last post... now shes tellin me shes horny and shes trying to tease me.... over a chat... and she showed me webcam of her in a robe... and she said she loves me in a joking way and now shes telling me to wait for her to get out of the shower so we can talk more is this normal for a friend, or can i expect a relationship with this girl... shes clearly smarter than me and MESSING WITH MY HEAD lol so yeah im currently waiting for her to get out of teh shower what are your thoughts... anyone Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 She's a mind-f*cker. Avoid. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Shyguy92 Posted January 5, 2011 Author Share Posted January 5, 2011 also she keeps asking me if i get it? and she says sorry that i have to deal with her horniness. and wait brb blah blah Also may i add that i always talk about how beautiful i think she is, and yeah so what to i do here... she may just be leading me on again... but shes only had one bf and not many dates with other people so i just dont understand some of these games she may or may not be playing.. i think i need to talk to a professional about this but in the mean time, anyone that reads over these posts, please provide suggestions, past experiences, and or helpful advice thanks Link to post Share on other sites
Author Shyguy92 Posted January 5, 2011 Author Share Posted January 5, 2011 She's a mind-f*cker. Avoid. damn but i really like her... maybe you can just tell me what else you might be thinking... i mean alot of **** has happened to her... she survived cancer, her mom died when she was 13, and shes like the only girl that i talk to, since like i said, i haven't had a girlfriend before. I may or may not sound desperate but something about her just really makes me want her bad, and in the emotional romantic sense, not the sexual sense If thats all you want to say on the matter, than thanks, but you seem like you have more experience than that. 19,000 posts?? damn Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 LS'ers taught me a word - unstable - which may apply here. Absent required contact, I'd suggest a healthy distance. BTW, welcome to LS Oh, lastly, the first woman I loved was like that, unstable, and the dynamic haunted me for nearly two of your lifetimes. Hence my advice. Avoid. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Shyguy92 Posted January 5, 2011 Author Share Posted January 5, 2011 ok im gonna talk to her for just a little while and maybe i can talk to you about what she says. since i really have no one else to talk to about, since everyone i know, knows her, and i dont really want people knowing that i like her, if you can understand my crappy speech haha. She even suggested that we stop talking all together earlier, because of the fact that, and when i said that we can just stay friends like before it doesnt matter to me, she said these things and I quote ":•its just gonna make you like me more though... •and if nothing happens........... then we will both feel like **** •especially you •and me •idk •both of us •im sorry end quote this is stuff she said way earlier today though (we have been having like 5 hour long conversations a day on the computer btw) I wish there was a PM feature on here haha and sorry if i may be annoying you anyway she will be back soon and btw you say she is unstable, but i have been having these sort of mood swings for a long time, i wouldnt say im bipolar or anything, but anyway im in no way to be judging her mental state. im just trying to cover all the bases with this information btw. i always lost touch with girls that im interested in and i dont feel like losing another. oh and just to re-elaborate she always contacts ME and she was at the hospital today and said she missed talking to me and idk but it seems like its shifting from friend zone to tease god help me Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 we have been having like 5 hour long conversations a day on the computer Classic sign. I'm sure others will add on as you share more info. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Shyguy92 Posted January 5, 2011 Author Share Posted January 5, 2011 hmm okay so last night she came out of the shower, and had a tank top on, and not much down below, anyway, she got on webcam then got scared that maybe I saw something, and after playin around a bit she told me that if I told her what I saw, she would do me a favor. Now I was skeptical to say the least, and didn't really catch her drift, but long story short, she ended up showing me her breasts on camera, and then a short while after that I went to bed. Today at school she acted like nothing happened last night, and nothing really did happen, since it was only a measly camera flirt, but she talked to me more than she usually does, and kinda sat down on the floor next to where my desk was, talking to me and another one of her friends.. (we had a pretty much free period) Also she talked about "next time she might show more" No drama yet, but who knows since she does seem pretty unstable like you said. Will keep you posted Oh and on an unrelated note, thanks for the welcome onto the site. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Shyguy92 Posted January 10, 2011 Author Share Posted January 10, 2011 Ok, what does it mean if she tells me this on the phone: "I wish you could be like you are on the phone, in class, because I really like how you talk to me on the phone and online" Does this mean she will go out with me if I am more spontaneous and funny in real life? Cuz thats how i am on the phone, but because I have low self esteem I can never act my self in person, because I think I look stupid... I wish she was easier... I really really do... Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 10, 2011 Share Posted January 10, 2011 My interpretation is that she has an image of you online and on the phone which doesn't match up with real life. Likely this is due to the real life chemistry not matching up with what she expected. People can be 'different' but there's still chemistry, if it's there. If you're young, this chemistry can often be more 'superficial', so changes in your appearance, dress and demeanor in person can have marked effect. Only time and life experience will help you match things up for yourself. You already seem to have identified a couple area to work on, so that's great news. I'd suggest soliciting feedback from trusted friends. They know you best and a good friend should provide an honest perspective. Also, as everyone views you differently, this 'chick friend' is only one of many you will meet in life. Look for patterns and work those. Lastly, since everyone is different, there will be other dynamics of compatibility open to you. It's a matter of meeting the right person as much as being the right person. Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
Author Shyguy92 Posted January 12, 2011 Author Share Posted January 12, 2011 : ) Thanks for the wisdom, my friend. Link to post Share on other sites
dispatch3d Posted January 14, 2011 Share Posted January 14, 2011 ask her out online, she couldn't be more clear unless she said "I want you inside me" that she at least has a little bit of feelings for you. If she says no to your request, she'll come around. The only thing I'm certain of right now is that she likes you, and if she doesn't agree to a date/hangout it's because of anxiety not because of a lack of her liking you. Link to post Share on other sites
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