i like him but he doesnt feel the same way?

[VideoKid]

I feel like a teenager with a crush but i've fallen for my best friend and its really getting too much to handle now.

 

Hes always been super nice to me. When we're out he'll buy me dinner and drinks (he bought me dinner 3 times last week) we've slept together a few times and he'll often just cuddle up with me and kiss me.

He's very playful with me and teases me alot. I've noticed most of his friends are male but he has a couple of other friends who are girls and he doesn't treat them as close as me even though he has known them longer.

Its just little things he does like for example we got a taxi home with 2 other friends a few nights ago, he paid and our 2 friends gave him cash back to split it, when i offered him my share he just said "no dont worry about it" and wouldn't take the money. Its not like I couldn't afford my share, we both have good jobs, its just the way he is with me.

But other times he will just treat me purely as a friend and pay no more attention to me than he would any normal friend.

 

The only problem is he's good looking and he knows it, he has girls all over him. One of his closest friends said to me that he hated seeing him mess me around in this way and wishes he'd just sort himself out as we're great together.

 

I finally broke down and told him how I felt over the weekend and he told me I was an amazing friend and he didn't want to lose me but there was no relationship there.

I told him I didn't want to lose him either but I felt messed around. He didn't feel the same and was adamant that he'd been straight with me from the start and wasn't looking for anything.

 

I'm finding it increasingly more difficult to be around him and push my feelings aside as I feel we'd be great together and all of our mutual friends think we already look like a couple half of the time.

I don't know what to do, I don't want to lose him as hes a big part of my life but I know I can't force him to have feelings for me.

[Miss Clavel]

So what happened?

[Boundary Problem]

I finally broke down and told him how I felt over the weekend and he told me I was an amazing friend and he didn't want to lose me but there was no relationship there.

 

I told him I didn't want to lose him either but I felt messed around. He didn't feel the same and was adamant that he'd been straight with me from the start and wasn't looking for anything.

 

 

 

Do what feels right for you.

 

If it was me? And I felt so strongly about him?

 

I would walk, cut contact. If he's interested he can follow.

 

You need to cut contact to get over him, so you can move on.

 

The opinion of his friends and him paying for a cab ride are completely irrelevant data. When men talk about relationships you have to take them at face value.

 

Do you want to be his permanent FWB?

[ADF]

It sounds to me like he's maneuvered you into a de facto FWB and wants to keep you there. Keep this in mind: for many men--maybe even most men--having a GF is NOT the ideal situation. For most men, having a FWB is the ideal situation. In FWB, he gets sex without strings--the ultimate win-win situation. Once you've agreed to a FWB relationship, either by words or through your actions, the chances of it going any further are nearly zero. In fact, if a man's FWB presses the issue, 9 times out of 10 he'll just end the relationship. I think you guys need to sort this out in a serious talk.

[jerseyboy]

You've been played hon.

 

And dont take his sincerity by having told you his intentions all along as a sign of his good will and concern for you either.

 

Most guys learn at some point that you dont need to lie to girls to have them like you. That in fact being truthful about your overall interest just tends to make them try harder.

 

You can just about guarantee telling most women you just want to be friends and not pursure a relationship with them will get them pursuing you like fiends.

[Jordanjames]

OP I am sorry to say but you have definitely been played. Your so called friend had "sex" with you! I am sorry but that's not a friend. A friend is someone you spend time with, talk on the phone, hang out but certainly not kiss and have sex with. This guy likes his situation with you because you are FWB. I am sorry to say but this is your case. It seems like you want more but he is unwilling to give you more. I think the best thing for you to do is examine if you can REALLY be just his friend. If you cannot the best thing for you to do is move on. Also, your so called friend is not a friend at all. I am sorry to say this guy is using you for sex because he can. OP he may try to say to you "well maybe in the future we can become something". However OP the truth of the matter is you and this guy cannot be friends because you have feelings for him and you also slept with him. It is going to be hard but you have to cut ties with this man unless he is willing and able to give you a relationship.