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Friend Duty


johan

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I have a friend who is leaving the country for several weeks. He needs someone to check his mail and water his plants while he's gone. I honestly don't want to be bothered with it. I did it before, and felt is was ridiculous. I think if you're going to plan something like that, then you should be self-sufficient about it and not make it everyone else's trip, too.

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There are self-watering plants, now? I gotta get me some of them. My houseplant is dying a slow, painful death, and I got "mother in law's tongue" or whatever it's called, and it's supposed to be impossible to kill.

 

Anyway, isn't part of the reason you have a friend check on your place daily to discourage theft? That's what I've always heard.

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Where's your friend going? Anywhere exotic?

 

I sense vacation resentment.

 

He's headed to Europe.

 

I have no envy. I just don't want to be obligated. He made all his plans and pretty much assumed me into them. I grudgingly do these things for family, but he's not family.

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Don't forget to change the locks, move the furniture around, move the pictures, put plastic wrap on toilet seats, etc...

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Not a bad idea.

 

Some people are happy to do this kind of stuff. They cheerfully show up and do all the chores. I just get irked when I'm put on the spot. Like "hey, you're my friend right? That means you'll do all this stuff for me. I have a list." I hate being a necessary part of someone else's plans.

 

I'd probably offer if he started describing how he's planning to get it taken care of on his own. But he didn't. He pretty much said "I'll be needing you to do this stuff". And I pretty much feel like I don't need to.

 

I wouldn't bother posting about it, except I have to deal with the fact that I'm a bit of an assh*le when it comes to things like this.

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What if he asked in a nice way instead of in an assumptive way? Would it still bother you as much?

 

"Hey Johan, can you do me a favour? I'm going on a trip and was hoping someone could help me with the plants and stuff. It would help me out a lot."

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I think you're just sore about being widely perceived as good-old-dependable johan, when you really want to be 100% pure badass. You've clearly been cultivating the wrong reputation.

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RecordProducer
I have a friend who is leaving the country for several weeks. He needs someone to check his mail and water his plants while he's gone. I honestly don't want to be bothered with it. I did it before, and felt is was ridiculous. I think if you're going to plan something like that, then you should be self-sufficient about it and not make it everyone else's trip, too.

 

I agree with you. And nobody else will. People just love using others and being super-useful to others...not me...not you. Get used to it or lose the firend. It is what it is. F*ck!

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RecordProducer
I agree. Firends are good for nothing. In fact, I don't even know what a firend is. Useless!

You don't know what a friend is? It's the person who makes you feel great when you advance in your life,

 

because they envy you and it's so obvious, it makes you feel really gooooooood... :laugh:

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I agree. Firends are good for nothing. In fact, I don't even know what a firend is.

It's Serbo-Croatian for a certain kind of arrogant attitude.

 

I agree with you. And nobody else will. People just love using others and being super-useful to others...not me...not you. Get used to it or lose the firend. It is what it is. F*ck!
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RecordProducer
It's Serbo-Croatian for a certain kind of arrogant attitude.

Many friends turn out to be not-so-real friends; I think most people recognize this. I don't see what's so funny about a typing error nor do I see that the remark mentioning Serbo-Croatian language serves any purpose other than exercising arrogance.

 

I spoke in general terms and the two of you are insulting me personally, even about things that have nothing to do with the topic.

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RP - it was a joke - strictly a play on words about "lose the firend," and not a comment about your attitude. I used Serbo-Croatian because I remembered a little bit about where you come from and I was actually trying to personalize it to include you in the joke, but I'm sorry it didn't come off that way. I promise you there was no arrogance or ill will in my heart. I apologize and it won't happen again.

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IfWishesWereHorses
Many friends turn out to be not-so-real friends; I think most people recognize this. I don't see what's so funny about a typing error nor do I see that the remark mentioning Serbo-Croatian language serves any purpose other than exercising arrogance.

 

I spoke in general terms and the two of you are insulting me personally, even about things that have nothing to do with the topic.

 

 

Or Trimmer was trying to be funny?????

 

Johan,

Can you not bring the plants to your house to care for and call the post office and ask them to hold the mail until the date he returns?

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RecordProducer
RP - it was a joke - strictly a play on words about "lose the firend," and not a comment about your attitude. I used Serbo-Croatian because I remembered a little bit about where you come from and I was actually trying to personalize it to include you in the joke, but I'm sorry it didn't come off that way. I promise you there was no arrogance or ill will in my heart. I apologize and it won't happen again.

OK. :) I am sorry too that I got it the wrong way. It happens on these forums all the time. Especially early in the morning, at 11,30 a.m. :laugh:

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