tet Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 Hi, I'm a 22 year old guy that just registered today after I found these boards via google. It seems like this is a good place to communicate and try to get help regarding my little problem. This is complicated so i'll try to go straight to the point. There are 3 girls. I had 2 very very good female friends since 1st grade - they were best friends with each other (Let's call them X and Y). After 8th grade we moved to the same high school. We grew apart as they made friends faster than i did... especially male friends. The third girl I came to know in high school. Let's call her "the girl that got away". I - High School ('98-'02) and X I kinda fell for X. Over the course of 2-3 years (10th grade to 12th grade) I had these hidden feelings for her but never told her anything because she started dating this one guy and then another. Finally -in what seems to be a climactic ending- i had a chance nearing graduation when she had broken with the last guy. I did the worst thing ever and wrote her a letter and gave it to her about 3 days before a senior trip to Cancun (READ: BAD IDEA). Needless to say i did not enjoy the trip as well as anyone who has gone has. I saw her kiss with one of my best friends 2-3 times while being drunk - it broke me, but we all know for a fact people do crazy stuff while being drunk. After 3 days i got her to talk and she recited the lovely "friends" speech. I felt devastated but i guess not enjoying the trip was my own mistake since i probably should have tried to communicate with her way before this. II - College and Y Fast forward to about from summer 2006 to xmas 06 - college year 5... i started falling for "Y" which is the other friend (after all these years). We started seeing each other more because one of my house mates (also one of my best HS buds) started hanging out with her crew a lot more and I THOUGHT she was making moves on me. I kept my feelings inside until about early December where i called her and since she didn't answer left a voice mail. During this semester i had fallen into a deep depression with what we would call "emo" behavior - i wanted to kill myself for several reasons. The biggest and most influential reason: My college life simply wasn't going as planned. It was hell for me waiting for her to answer... but we called ourselves to see when we could meet and talk it up. We finally did and she told me she was seeing this other guy and that maybe if i had told her earlier she would have gone out with me (which to me was just a lie to not make me feel miserable). The Girl That Got Away Now somewhere around that same time, my best friend told me that one girl from my HS liked me a lot. This girl... was perhaps the most attractive, impressively intelligent and sweetest girl around. Two of my buds in HS made moves on her and she gave them the friend's speech which is why i probably never bothered - she intimidated me and I had set my mind on the fact that she was probably WAY out of my league, even though i genuinely liked her. But to think that i was behind someone i thought was reachable and not even near this other girl in terms of just about everything... At that time when my bud told me I didn't give it much thought, but now since around February (st. valentines apparently does that to you) to today I've been having dreams about it and it's seriously killing me. The thing is that i haven't seen this girl in about 4 maybe 5 years... also I heard she was going out with this young hotshot college professor. So I guess the part where i need opinions/advice is here: After my failed attempt at High School I keep going after friends or former HS classmates... It seems that somehow I'm stuck in the past and cannot move on. Therefore, I'm split torn towards this, either i try somehow to just stop worrying about the past (which I've tried) OR i try to contact "the girl that got away" somehow. The solution I've come to is just writing her a letter asking how she is and explaining to her that i did like her in HS, and that i hope she has a good life. This seems like a perfect way to stop my dreams, thoughts and the whole "stuck in the past" thing. The other side of me is hoping she would answer, say she's single and that i could try to get her to go out with me. So I don't know. A letter would be a little weird? A phone call 4 years later might be weirder (and/or requesting to meet up out of the blue), and also i don't have her phone number but i do have a buddy that lives near her. Seriously what do i do? I don't wanna butt into her life right now if she has a good thing going but all signs point at "you should do this so you can finally break free from the past". I would appreciate all opinions and comments you guys can give me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tet Posted April 12, 2007 Author Share Posted April 12, 2007 well i'm guessing nobody has any real advice towards this, I understand though, since it's kind of complicated and i doubt the exact same situation has happened to someone else here. So i'm just gonna go ahead with the letter and work from there. Thanks though (perhaps i should have added - I talked to "the girl that got away a lot" during high school, perhaps not as much as i would have liked but she was fun. To this date i haven't seen any woman remotely comparable to her in any way.) Link to post Share on other sites
ShoeGirl Posted April 12, 2007 Share Posted April 12, 2007 Why don't you try and find her on myspace or facebook? I have caught up with a bunch of people from high school through both of those sites. It will give you a chance to talk to her and see what she is up to. Just don't go and right away tell her you liked her in high school, just ask her what she is up to, how school is going, etc. Link to post Share on other sites
Sassy Gal Posted April 12, 2007 Share Posted April 12, 2007 yes MySpace helped me find a couple of old friends of mine! and i agree dont just jump in and start relationship talks..... Link to post Share on other sites
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