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Moving for husband's job, but I'm not happy with his decision


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I've been in my new job (manager of day center for adults with Down's Syndrome) for 6 weeks now, but my husband told me he'd got a new job in the UK, said it was basically he'd work in McDonald's in Cambridge, England and a McDonald's in North London, England, and that the job was a sinecure.

 

I told him I didn't want to move, but he said they'd got his visa stuff sorted and he could start within the next few weeks.

 

I don't know much, but isn't immigration a hot-button issue over in England, especially for two Californians like us (I'm 1/2 Japanese-American, 1/2 Scottish, my husband's a mixture of Vietnamese, Mexican and Irish-American) and would we face racism?

 

Why would the McDonald's offer him a sinecure, are they breaking employment law?

 

In truth, I DON'T WANT TO MOVE, but my husband refuses to accept my arguments and insists we're moving.

 

What the hell do I do?

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so your husband applied for a job in the UK with no word about this to you? it seems rather bizarre that he'd be applying for and accepting positions in another country without you guys having some prior discussion about it. did you know this was a possibility, and that he had applied? on the upside you've only been at your job 6 weeks so you wouldn't be giving up a career to go there and join him. maybe he can go over first without you on a trial basis and set himself up, and if it works out and the employment is secure you can join him in a few months. lots of couples do that.

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Why is your husband making a unilateral decision like this without even having TOLD you that he was applying?

 

The issue here isn't the move to the UK (which I think would be fine for you in and of itself)... it's your husband's actions.

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No idea if employment law is being broken but the wise thing with a sinecure is not to uproot your whole life.

 

I mean - it's not guaranteed.

 

If I were you I'd stay put - but it sounds like he sees himself as being the boss.

Do you have a voice in this RS?

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It's very bizarre he didn't tell you anything. He was applying and decided to move and don't ask you? It's normal in your relationship?

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Wait – he wants you two to move across the globe for a job at MC DONALDS? Will he be working for some sort of corporate headquarters or something? He is getting a “sinecure” there? HUH? So, McDonalds is importing American workers to do cushy jobs in the UK?

 

I am sorry hun, this make no sense. You are correct, one does not just pick up and start a new job overseas without a lot of paper work.

 

And again, MC DONALDS?

 

So confused.

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Last time I looked McDonald's doesn't have sinecure jobs. They want people to show up to actually cook the burger, take the orders & hand out the happy meals. If these positions that your husband has been offered don't require him to be there -- which is the definition of sinecure -- why do you have to move? He can not show up from where you are living now.

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