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Crush on my supervisor


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So I've had this crush on my supervisor for a while now (approx a year) and while I was able to ignore it for 90% of the past year, apparently it's gone into overdrive and I now have this uncontrollable fantasy about him. It's bad enough that whenever I'm around him or he says hi to me I turn into a red faced lunatic; I get so embarrassed that I look for any excuse to run away. In some instances, he's said hi to me and all I can manage is a smile before I walk off quickly in the opposite direction. Frankly, it's driving me crazy, because I take work and professionalism very seriously and while this isn't exactly a career job (I'm just working part time retail while I'm still a student), I innately find my "crush" extremely inappropriate. I should point out that the embarrassment is the worst thing for me because I'm super shy and I hate for him (or anyone else) to think "why is she so weird around me?"

 

On the flip side, my last ex was through work (ironically) so I've been thru the whole 'dating someone from work' situation. So a part of me totally wants to make the fantasy come true and the other part of me wants to slap myself for even entertaining the idea.

 

I guess I'm looking for a few thoughts on what I should do.... Should I just keep ignoring my crush and wait til it goes away (is that even likely?) or should I act on it? Would it be inappropriate to ask someone out who is (in a way) my boss, even though I will not be making a career from this job/company?

 

:( from a very shy girl

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You need to kill the fantasy you have going on and think of him in a different way. Distract yourself and don't let your mind wander anymore.

Find a new crush!

 

 

Is there any reason why he hasn't asked you out yet?

 

He's her supervisor. kind of a no-no since he's her boss!

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Because it's a p/t job that you have while you are going to school, the work place romance is less problematic than if this was your career. While it might be a p.i.t.a. you could get a new job if it came to that.

 

 

He's your boss. You can't ask him out.

 

 

For now, work on yourself. Build your own confidence by interacting with him without getting all embarrassed goofy & red in the face. Try holding your feet to the floor & saying hello. While he may be your crush, he's still just a person.

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Confuddled1983

Is there anyway you could suggest that a few of you from work go for a few drinks on the weekend, or bowling or the cinema even? For "team building" purposes of course!

 

You might find you don't like him so much out of a work setting, or you could both end up getting along great and something could develop.

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So what if he's her boss? Like she said, this is just a part-time job. If things develop between them, she can easily change jobs to allow the relationship to thrive.

 

I am in a similar situation, although a decade plus older than the OP, and have taken interest in this topic lately as I have no first hand experience with dating or having a crush on anyone I've ever worked with. Until lately, that is. :love:

 

And I have to say from what I've read online so far that I am seriously baffled by the ubiquity of advice along the lines: 'but OMG noooo! you can't be crushing on your supervisor, all hell will break loose! [insert pet horror story about disastrous workplace relationships] You must stop this madness at once! Run! Splash yourself with a bucket of cold water! Take a chill pill! Perform lobotomy! Change your crush THIS MINUTE, just whatever you do DO NOT COMPROMISE YOUR JOB.'

 

Wow... what a sad perspective, people. Intense attraction for someone - close your eyes and tap your heels three times, and presto... it'll be gone like a breeze that brought it in in the first place. Job on the other hand - well, that's non-negotiable, and of course... loyalty to the firm first and foremost.

 

How depressingly 1984.

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