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My boss's peculiar behavior


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SlightlyMad

Let me preface this post by saying that I am not complaining, just curious about the psyche of my boss.

 

I have been told by many people that my boss and I have the same exact personality. We come from similar backgrounds in where we spent years in blue collar jobs only to have a corporate job. We actually applied and got rejected for the same job 3 years apart! Those same people have mentioned if she wasn't my boss and the situation she was in, she's hinting that she is interested in me.

 

The situation she is in aside from being my boss is that she is married to a guy 20 years older than she is. She is 33, I am 30. Here are some examples to what they claim is her throwing her interest out there, but I am not so sure about:

 

-Truly acts like herself (quirky personality and all) around me. Acts like a regular boss to my coworkers

-Routinely asks me about how I feel about certain women in the office

-Says things like "I totally would have played footsie in the meeting if I had the chance"

-Asks me my opinion on her family and other issues most managers don't ask their employees

-Routinely jokes about sex and other 'taboo' stuff with me

-As we walk down the hallway, she hooks my arm and skips

 

 

Now, I am just chalking this up to her feeling really comfortable around me. I am flattered because I can genuinely say that my boss and I can talk about almost anything. (And we do)

 

I have seen her drunk a few times by coincidence (We happened to be at the same place for two unrelated events), she wasn't handsy perse, but she talked to me nonstop for a good 45 minutes with her husband watching from afar.

Whether she is feeling unfulfilled in her current situation and since I am a guy in her age range who has stuff in common with her, this may be the reasoning behind it all.

 

Have to admit, sometimes I feel as if I am crushing on her. Not all of the time, it comes and goes Especially when she talks about footsie and how she dresses sometimes. Usually, she is pretty casual and plain jane - sweater, jeans, sneakers. But today in our satellite office she was especially dolled up - makeup, nice dress, fishnet tights and boots. Was taken aback a bit and quite impressed.

 

Feel like I am in high school with this post, but I would throw it out there anyway. Thanks for those who respond and who took the time to read this!

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I don't know what line of work you are in, but she is incredibly unprofessional. Do not get involved with her (recall she is married, and may very well be unhappy and "looking") unless you are certain you can find work elsewhere.

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chucksagent

If you have no morals and value system, you could easily just try and hook up with her (especially if she is hot).

 

But if you respect yourself and believe in karma, I would start by ceasing all PHYSICAL interaction as even that is unprofessional in a work atmosphere.

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Yeah she sounds kind of ridiculous...not very mature and not very professional. I wonder who put her in that manager position? And why?

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GorillaTheater

Step back and look at this situation from 50,000 feet.

 

Then ask yourself what could possibly go wrong with screwing your married boss.

 

Arms-length distance, man.

Edited by GorillaTheater
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As a serial cheater, I don't understand why the targeted party is always so thrilled to be part of this.

You are meat.

She has a beta in the husband position and she is an alpha in the office.

You might actually want to nose around a bit because since she is confident, super un-professional with a bitch for a husband she may well be cuckolding them. I had a few guys I dated where I would flaunt what I was doing and they were into it. Ask if her husband "wears the horns" haha.

 

But seriously, she seems boarderline to act that way at work with you. You are fresh meat for a crazy woman with little regard of consequences and this is the person with your job in her hands. She is wet as **** on the power trip she is getting off you and the b-hubby.

 

You feel like you are in high school again writing this? Ever see the line of high school kids on valentines day bawling because their bf/gf bounced to spend the day with someone else? High school relationships ****ing sucked.

This one will too.

Edited by WhoreyBull
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Yeah she sounds kind of ridiculous...not very mature and not very professional. I wonder who put her in that manager position? And why?

 

I agree. I would have thought he was describing a girl in her early 20s if he didn't say that she was his manager.

 

Hooking arms? Playing footsie? And she's married. :confused:

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SincereOnlineGuy
Let me preface this post by saying

 

 

It would have been more helpful had you prefaced it by saying you are a male.

 

 

I don't exactly sense that you've communicated what you're trying to establish/learn from having started this thread.

 

Now clearly IF the sexual stuff is out of bounds, or makes you uncomfortable, you are free to complain and have it stopped.

 

What you describe probably IS a function of your age and sex relative to hers, but it is up to you to decide whether any of it has been out-of-bounds per workplace regulations.

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Don't entertain her. She seems too unprofessional to the point where she could cry foul if you don't reciporcate. Find someone more mentally mature, unmarried and outside of work perhaps.

 

This one sounds like trouble. She's basically serving it up on a corporate platter. Red flag. Run far away. Lol.

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chucksagent

I wasn't being sarcastic either...

 

If you have no morals and value system, I would ABSOLUTELY continue to flirt and enjoy this sexual tension on a day to day basis hopefully climaxing in some adult film cliche in someones office or conference room.

 

But Man...BELIEVE me...I can't prove that ANY one version of ANY world religion exhists...But I am CONFIDENT a greater power/energy exists and you do NOT want that Karma following you around...Take it from someone who learned the hardway.

 

I am a great guy...giving in everyway...I TRULY abide by do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

 

At a very young age (18) I had the love of my life cheat on me in a situation I KNEW and PREDICTED would happen (family vacation she went on).

 

I am the kind of person who is VERY analytical and has good instincts...so I hated myself for doubting them...well for the next few years (most of college) I had no regard for any relationships...I didn't want serious commitment and if I met a woman with a boyfriend, I didn't care, I would try and hook up with her. I have NEVER gone for married women because that would be too low even when I was at my lowest.

 

But when I learned to let go of my hate and mistrust, and started seriously dating again in law school....EVERY WOMAN I EVER got involved with going forward, the universal power TESTED me with "ex boyfriends texting" or "male friends being too friendly" or "FB creepers being inappropriate." And the question I was always left asking myself is "who do these guys think they are??" And I WAS THAT GUY!!! So as a person who doesn't believe in coincidence, when the REST of the universe was spilling unto my AMAZING wonders and glories (I have everything I could ever want), it was this ONE aspect of life I would always face battles with. And I KNOW its because of the dark time in my life and bad decisions I made with respect to others feelings.

 

Don't go down that path man, it's not worth it.

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Step back and look at this situation from 50,000 feet.

 

Then ask yourself what could possibly go wrong with screwing your married boss.

 

Arms-length distance, man.

 

Couldn't have said it any better myself. Yes...you need to watch out...do not chart her waters.

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