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Two faced coworkers


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TurtlePower

Lately, I have been dealing with a coworker from hell (At least for me anyway). He's been working with me for the past 10 months, learning more and more everyday, up to the point where our boss has given him more responsibility in one facet so I can focus all my energy on another facet. Since then, I've noticed a change in his demeanor and attitude toward me and the clients we deal with.

 

My main gripe is he acts totally different when our boss is around as oppposed when he is not.

 

Example: When the boss is there, he is prim and proper, respectful, quiet, and go getter. The minute our boss leaves (Even for a quick smoke), his body language changes, completely is disrespectful to clients (i'll explain), just an overall negative attitude. He feels he shouldn't have to learn all facets of our job, just the one he has given more responsibility. The goal is that we everything in all facets. I grasped that, he rather not, by saying, "That's your department, I'm not doing that."

 

Of course when the boss returns, he's back to "Sure, I'll do anything you ask of me."

 

Argh. It angers me because I am the only one who sees this side of him and I don't know how to approach my boss about it.

 

Anyway, back to being disrespectful to clients. One of our responsibilities is to check on them to make sure they are doing ok with the software & hardware we installed for them. Occasionally, they make a mistake where we have to help them. The jerk of a coworker thinks it's fun to play mind games with them. Not directly answering their question, but instead blindly stares at them for a few minutes. He thinks he's being funny, he is not. Or rather put off solutions because he feels "its not my fault they pick this stuff up faster". He fails to remember when he first started, he couldn't access his email without my help!

 

Already a long story short, I try to help him because I am his trainer. I try suggesting to do certain things such as what to say in emails so our clients can understand what we are saying (there is a lot of technical lingo). He brushes off whatever I suggest like I have no idea what I am doing even though I have been doing this for 2 years now. He asks our boss how to word emails or other suggestions and word for word , our boss suggests the exact same thing I said prior! :mad: He does this with everything. I get the feeling he doesn't being like told what to do by me. I explain to him that I am just looking out for him, but he doesn't see it that way. I am sorry for the long post, this is and has been bothering me for quite some time now!!

 

Thanks for at least taking the time to read this.

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What vibe are you giving off?

 

Everywhere I go, people think I am in charge- I don't even know what I do to give off that vibe... I can't describe it, it just happens. I don't know what vibe I give off, but people will approach me and ask me what to do.

 

I'm as scared as the next person, but people assume I am in charge. I don't want the pressure of being in charge.

 

Consider your vibe, consider how you come across to other people. Are you in charge, or not? Do you want to be, or do you think you should be?

 

It's all about the vibe you give off.

 

Me, personally? I recently took a job on contract after quitting a high stress/pressure position. I just wanted something low pressure- and I ended up being in charge. I didn't want to be- but it ended up that way- it always ends up that way.

 

Consider your vibe. If you're a leader, you will never be able to avoid it, whether you want to or not. Even if you're insecure like I am, it won't escape you.

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TurtlePower

Supervising him? No. But, I am helping him out (Part of my responsibility of being his trainer) because I didn't want him making the same mistakes I made when I was new.

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Everyone would tackle these situations differently but I would mention something to my supervisor, if I felt they would listen, and I would withdraw any help from the co-worker. I would also make sure that my work and his didn't get muddled in any way; in other words, I would be sure to hand over anything that he was dealing with to him (documented in email) so that when it all comes crashing round around him, I'm not implicated. You need to separate out how you deal with customers from how he does so it's clear who has been doing what.

 

But, somehow you do need to let your supervisor know that the co-worker is ignoring your advice and that his behaviour might upset customers. Then leave the supervisor to suss it out. Meanwhile, document everthing yourself in case this gets very difficult and he tries to drop you in it when his actions start backfiring on him.

Edited by spiderowl
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  • 2 months later...
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Quick update for everyone - the jerk of my coworker has been away on a business trip for the past 2 weeks with our boss and other coworkers. They have finally seen what I have seen!!

 

Apparently, it was so bad, my boss told a coworker that she need a break from him! His true self has come out these past 2 weeks, I am glad other people are starting to see his bad attitude now!

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In the day and age of smart phone camcorders, it would be a cinch to discreetly record his two faced shenanigans (shananigans, what a great word....) and "discreetly" play them back for your boss. Then, instantly delete them in front of your boss and wink as you walk away saying "...what video?"

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I never tell any of the people at my day job about things I do outside the workplace... because I know how workplace gossip spreads like the flu once it gets out.

 

What my co-workers don't know, won't hurt them.

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Quick update for everyone - the jerk of my coworker has been away on a business trip for the past 2 weeks with our boss and other coworkers. They have finally seen what I have seen!!

 

Apparently, it was so bad, my boss told a coworker that she need a break from him! His true self has come out these past 2 weeks, I am glad other people are starting to see his bad attitude now!

 

:) See? Everything in darkness must come to light! They will probably get rid of him.

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