Did i sound bad with coworker? One night thing?

[rose45]

Well i have been at this company for a few years..i always thought this one guy was good looking and had a good personality as well

 

I have been kind of down lately at work, not looking good more than usual..different problems going on..he actually approached me casually last week and asked are u ok? and i said yea and he was like are you sure, you promise? and i didn't really say anything to that..he then approached me later and like sat on the opposite end of me and said i am more quiet than usual and he knows something is wrong and he offered to take me out for a drink to talk..and i said maybe..and he said he would ask again before leaving..it turns out a coworkers offered him baseball tickets though which of course he should go to and he did..no hard feelings there since i didn't even completely agree anyway.

 

We went out the other week with coworkers..for some reason i had it in my head where i wanted to get to be alone with him..i think some part of me always had a little crush on him but most times at work i know that i look bad b/c i don't spend alot of time getting ready in the morning.

 

For some reason I did have it in my head that i wanted to kiss him tonight and spend time with him...i really didn't think it would happen though or if he was even attracted to me...towards the end of the evening he approached me and said something and then said do i want to do a shot and i said sure..so we wind up at the bar by ourselves..it looked like most of the coworkers left..it seems like he was attracted to me..he placed his hand on my back once, leaned in closer when i couldnt hear what he was saying where he was pretty close to my mouth..We did wind up leaving together and went to his place.

 

When we left i didn't think it was going to happen but he got a cab and opened the door for me and we both got in and headed to his place. I just felt with him i guess..we did wind up making out at his place..the kisses seemed more sensual and soft..but before anything happened we were laying down together and he said my name and like what am i doing here in a casual/nice way..and i said do you want me to go and he said no if i didn't want you here i wouldn't have invited you. And i said i just wanted to spend time with you. I don't know who kissed who first but i really enjoyed it..I also was not very drunk or anything..i might have been buzzed but i drank a few glasses of water as well so i think i was more relaxed etc. but i wasn't helpless and don't think he did anything wrong really.

 

Things got somewhat physical but nothing where i need to have a test done or anything..my clothes stayed on;his didn't for the most part.. i remained strong with my will power not to sleep with him even though i wanted to.

I feel like i was too emotional though and maybe that took a lot of points away from me?....maybe i should have had more fun with the situation and joked more...i felt like i blew it with me saying i just wanted to spend time with u, when we kissed i put my emotions in it..i touched his face while we kissed, kissed his neck. Is that too much or just a kissing style?....

 

When we were laying on the bed and i sat up to look at him he was being nice ..he kept playing with my hair and pushing it out of my face and tucked it behind my ear..he did say that he was concerned about me the past few days and i said well ur the only one..noone else notices and he said maybe they aren't looking...i also said to him well i guess you are attracted to me. I also moined that tiny slightly bit like that feels good when we kissed..he joked later saying good for me with my willpower lol..i was also pretty guarded not letting him do certain things like take my top off etc..and was nervous as well i guess which he pointed out but not in a mean way. He just said you are nervous

 

I also was buzzed so i guess that is why i said we can't hang out again and he went along with it and and i said so i guess you don't want to hang out again and he said that was a trick question..so basically through that he must have known i wanted to see him again and was just trying to get his thoughts on the matter...

 

We spoke about how the next day was going to be and he said it is going to be weird and he almost feels bad but he gets the sense i wanted to come here tonight too and it wasn't just him and i agreed..and he said but i will come in, in the morning and say what i always say to you and you will say the same. When laying down he did kiss my forehead once, he did tell me i am very pretty.

 

I think i hinted at wanting to hang out again or talk etc but i don't think he was completely open like ok here is my number lets hang out again soon which kind of disappointed me. I did ask if he had wanted to sleep with me tonight and he said he would have done whatever i wanted to do. He said it wasn't like a master plan to get me here though and wanted me to know that. He did try to push things along when we were making out but not in this aggressive type way. I told him i did want to sleep with him as well.

 

The next day we came in like normal..he said the things he usually said to me..later on he asked if we were cool and i said yea..when i left i said goodnight to him and the person he shares the room with but as walking by we locked eyes for that second. I wish it was more than a one time thing because i feel like this is actually something i need and want for the time being and i like him a little regardless of where it went.

 

Was i too emotional with the things i said and did?? i kind of wish i can hang out with him again but it doesn't look like that is going to happen.

Now i think i have a bigger crush on him and keep thinking about kissing him again..that night would have been perfect for us to exchange numbers but it didn't happen and i guess this was just a one time thing.

 

I hope i am not seen as a pathetic/needy/psycho or something. I don't remember everything said word for word but from what i wrote--do i look like a pathetic loser or something?

 

Another day he was in his neighbors office which is by my desk and he said my name and i said hey..today was rather busy so that was basically it til the end of the day when i said goodbye like normal..

 

We don't seem to be making as much eye contact as we used to when he walks by my desk..i kind of miss the attention

 

i have been dressing a little better at work where i am not looking like crap and i have my hair down but maybe that is a mistake as well or something...

[Serenitynow]

i know that i look bad b/c i don't spend alot of time getting ready in the morning.

 

Why do women bash themselves, and just assume no one likes them if they dont spend X amount of hours in front of the mirror ?

 

 

We don't seem to be making as much eye contact as we used to when he walks by my desk..i kind of miss the attention

Sounds like maybe hes playing hard to get. (no surprise there)

 

Or since you didnt give it up the first night, than maybe hes not interested anymore. What else would you expect from someone that jumped in the sack the first night ?

 

.

[Jilly Bean]

Did you give him a blowjob? I get the sense you did.

 

Regardless, I get the feeling he thought you'd be an easy lay, because you seemed so troubled and down at work. He knew you liked him, and tried to take advantage of it. He played the nice guy, pretended to care about your problems, and then tried to get you in bed. He told you a few times that he wasn't interested in anything more happening with you, even while you were still together. This was his way of trying to get rid of you and let you down easily. I'm sure he was bummed you didn't put out, when he thought you'd be a easy target, so no, I wouldn't expect anything to happen in the future with this guy.

 

[rose45]

no i did not give him a bj..i said in the post i didn't do anything where i need to be tested for anything

[Jilly Bean]

no i did not give him a bj..i said in the post i didn't do anything where i need to be tested for anything

 

LOL. OK... you did say he his clothes were off, while yours were on. I just got the feeling you serviced him in some way.

 

I still stand by the rest of my post. Be cool at work from now on. You've worked there for a few years, and certainly don't need this kind of personal business thrown around the office.

[rose45]

the other issue is i wonder if he still thinks i am with my boyfriend..i think he figures we are on a break or something if i did something like this or we are just not together.

 

I actually approached his friend in the office today to kinda chat a little bit etc..and it came up with him saying something about my b/f to which i kinda said no not really we have been taking time apart..so maybe it will get back to the guy i like and maybe it won't but i felt like i should put it out there in some way now so if someone does find out about that situation i don't appear "sl**ty

 

i wasn't really interested in telling people in the office that i was no longer in a relationship..girls can be caddy and people can be nosy but now i feel like i backed myself in a corner and if anyone asks i will have to say the truth..

[SadandConfusedWA]

no i did not give him a bj..i said in the post i didn't do anything where i need to be tested for anything

 

Hand job?