NotKelly Posted August 24, 2009 Share Posted August 24, 2009 OK, right off the bat I admit: I am going to hell for this post. I will be flamed. I accept that and will not resist. But I just have to get this off my chest. Have you ever worked with someone who feels it's her bounden duty to devise and organize all kinds of charity efforts... and hit you up for the participation (or the bill)? This is a co-worker who really enjoys thinking up all kinds of ways to "go the extra mile" and "give of our hearts," but the catch is she can never do it by herself. She's always got to send a mass e-mail to everyone in the department saying "Come on gang! Let's take up a special collection for poor children in the city! Let's create home-baked meals for our sick colleague and take turns delivering them to her every week! Let's form a charity marathon team!" And then a few gung ho individuals respond to her e-mail in the affirmative (CCing everyone in) so that everyone feels forced to participate or else look like a meanie. Maybe I am a meanie, but I'm really tired of being nickel and dimed to death by this woman (or rather, $5-dollared and $10-dollared to death). What's worse, I am very busy and always forget (no, really) to bring her the money. I don't even know half the people she is intent on doing kindhearted stuff for (like, people who work at our company who I've never met). I am beginning to resent this woman who seems to like to be the ringleader of these heartwarming efforts but takes this subtly armtwisting public approach to get everyone involved. It's doubly difficult when it's a co-worker and her idea seems reasonable... except that this is the fourth or fifth such bright idea she's had this year. Not asking for help really. Just venting. I'm a terrible human being. Thanks for listening. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted August 24, 2009 Share Posted August 24, 2009 Maybe you should complain to HR about this. She's probably violating company by doing this. Poindexter will set her straight. LOL Link to post Share on other sites
shadowplay Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 I'm a terrible human being. Thanks for listening. You're welcome. Link to post Share on other sites
shadowplay Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 Btw I would resent that too. It reminds me of getting ambushed at a cash register by a chipper clerk asking "would you like to contribute a dollar to the so and so fund?!" Nobody wants to say "no" and look like a heartless bastard. I mean a dollar isn't much, but I'd rather contribute to charity because I want to, not because I'm shamed into it. The other day when I was charity ambushed at the drive-thru I got a little thrill out of flatly saying "no" through the microphone. My small act of rebellion against forced generosity. ::evil cackle:: Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 When I worked at a major research company, an ex-employee came round to visit all her ex-colleagues, and went round saying 'hi' to everyone, checking in, passing time, chatting away....I didn't know her. But upon leaving, she went to every desk - including mine - trying to drum up support and get donations for her favourite "hug a flower, kiss a weasel" charity. So she comes to my desk, right? And says, "Hi, I'm "Sheila" (not her real name, but a clue as to her provenance.... ) And I worked here for a long time, and today I'm collecting...." I interrupted her - "Well, stop right there. What you're doing is inappropriate. This is a place of work, and hounding people's good natures while backing them into a corner behind their desk is rude and completely intimidating. I don't know you, and I object to being pillared like this. So don't count on me for anything, because what you're doing is doubtless wonderful, but I bet you haven't had the courtesy to clear it with HR or management, have you?" And I shut up. So, astonishingly, did she..... After a second, she muttered some self-defensive remarks, and moved on to the next desk. And lo and behold, got the same response.....! She left shortly after that. I'm afraid I was the final person she got any feedback from. Try that. Link to post Share on other sites
seoa Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 no need to feel bad... just set yourself a yearly budget (an amount appropriate to your own conscience, which *of course* noone would expect you to disclose) and give it to the charity (or charities) of your choice... then when people ask for money for their favourite charity, you can smile and sincerely tell them that you've already allocated your yearly charitable giving budget... hugs & puppies all round, and you haven't paid a penny... works for me...! Link to post Share on other sites
kizik Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 F*ck charity. Those kids need to get jobs as shoeshiners or something. Link to post Share on other sites
Thaddeus Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 One can spread themselves and their resources pretty damn thin by trying to support every worthy cause. There are just too many, and they're bottomless pits. Personally, I have no problem whatsoever saying "no" to such things. There's one charity I give to, and I do so in such a way that my contribution actually makes a difference. By the way, don't get HR involved. Nothing good ever comes from involving HR departments. Just say "no" and be done with it. Link to post Share on other sites
laRubiaBonita Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 there is no need to feel bad- and the fact that you do feel bad means she has gotten to you!!!!! use the now classic line "with the current economic conditions being as they are......" Link to post Share on other sites
Shygirl15 Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 Yep, every office has at least one of those. Link to post Share on other sites
nana yaw II Posted August 27, 2009 Share Posted August 27, 2009 Maybe you should complain to HR about this. She's probably violating company by doing this. Poindexter will set her straight. LOL HR would most likely laugh at you, since this is a small thing. OP, just tell her that her e-mails are too distracting, but you nonetheless appreciate the gesture. Link to post Share on other sites
Angel1111 Posted August 27, 2009 Share Posted August 27, 2009 People like this annoy me to no end. They want to treat the workplace like it's a never-ending family get-together. The reason she sends emails to everybody in the world is because she thinks this makes her look good. Otherwise, she'd just quietly donate to a cause she believes in and shut up about it. If I were you, I'd just ignore her emails. Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted August 27, 2009 Share Posted August 27, 2009 okay the way I see it is simple . Ask this self delegated do gooder to take you off the list and even cc all your co-workers as a starting point. No shame in being honest. Simply put: Hey! Noticed you are involved in ALOT of good charity work. Congrats on your efforts! Here is a list of what I have budgeted and the charities that I have chosen this year. If your efforts arent of these causes, please exclude me from the mass email list. Otherwise I will gladly place a reminder on my calendars when these causes are due charity. Signed- Gonebrokefromcharitywork OUr workplace is less then 100 employees and we have done this very trick! Our President even agrees that if you want off the list, ask. Or if you want included ask. But dont just assume everyone in the company has the time or funds to give to all causes. ....He even sent that very message so all could see when our do-gooder tried to drum up money! It worked! Link to post Share on other sites
donnamaybe Posted August 27, 2009 Share Posted August 27, 2009 F*ck charity. Those kids need to get jobs as shoeshiners or something. LMAO!!! Though I'm not one to be the instigator of charity drives, I always give, even if just a little. It's interesting that, in one office I worked, we always took care of a needy family at Christmas time, and it was ALWAYS the staff on the lower end of the pay scale who gave the most. Link to post Share on other sites
Shygirl15 Posted August 27, 2009 Share Posted August 27, 2009 People like this annoy me to no end. They want to treat the workplace like it's a never-ending family get-together. A never-ending family get-together indeed. You'll see people busily organizing surprise birthday parties and running around distributing cake like that's what they were hired for! Bottom line is, most people have absolutely no life outside work. Link to post Share on other sites
imani Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 A never-ending family get-together indeed. You'll see people busily organizing surprise birthday parties and running around distributing cake like that's what they were hired for! Bottom line is, most people have absolutely no life outside work. May I add to this vent? It thoroughly annoys me when an employee is leaving the company, some idiot has to ask everyone to take him/her out to lunch and chip in to buy them a going away gift. All the while I'm thinking "I didn't like the b*tch prior to her leaving so why should I act like I've got the "sads" about her departure?" I hate this kind of hypocrisy. It also irks me when you want to have lunch alone and people take over your lunch time trying to chat you up, all because they are in the cafeteria having their lunch at the same time. Ugh. It bugs! I put it right up there with people who have to shw you pictures of their babies every move. One or two milestone moments is fine. But coming to my desk to show me little Jimmy's first potty-poop is waaaaay over the top. As to the OP, I agree with whoever said you should just say you've already donated to your favorite charity andleave it at that. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted August 28, 2009 Share Posted August 28, 2009 Imani, I took a sick day when this happened.... I couldn't stand the man. Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted August 30, 2009 Share Posted August 30, 2009 I would say " Listen Judy , I will try to donate $ 10 a month to a minimum of 2 of your charities (a Month.) I have other Charities in my life , along with other good causes I contribute to but I cannot save the world and donate to every Save the Pink Whale / Black Whale / Teal Whale/ Charity that you come up with. Its just not possible. You will have to be responsible for ALL these Charites because I dont think you can save the world either " Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted August 30, 2009 Share Posted August 30, 2009 Just don't donate. The more you give, the more you'll be harrassed. I have my personal charity I donate to- the SPCA. I always tell people that bug me that I give to my charity of choice. If people bug me too much I don't have an issue with telling them to buzz off.,,, But I don't say buzz:rolleyes: Link to post Share on other sites
IfWishesWereHorses Posted September 3, 2009 Share Posted September 3, 2009 I give to united way as well a4 our.local food bank. More than most people in our area make in a year. I also have no problem saying NO. My biggest pet peave are people who decide to sell dsomething for a living or host parties for those who do. I don't need cheap, jewelry, cosmetics,home decor, or cooking utensils. If you quit your day job yo depend on me you made a dire mistake. I did go to one party as a favor and when the woman called me out, saying you are the only person who doesn't want to have a party and get a free gift, I told her quite frankly that I wpould never put my friends in that position and that I would expect them to succumb to such techniques. All but two people in the room agreed. In all honestty I should have never gone. That said, I'm a sucker for a kid who shows up selling anything! Link to post Share on other sites
deux ex machina Posted September 3, 2009 Share Posted September 3, 2009 ... That said, I'm a sucker for a kid who shows up selling anything! I'm a sucker for kids selling Girl Scout cookies - those Thin Mints are like crack! Lol Link to post Share on other sites
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