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Toxic Manager

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Old 22nd July 2002, 4:19 PM   #1
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Toxic Manager

My manager at work makes the work environment really stressful for me. Normally I'm, fine, I can work alone well and I do my work as I can get to it. But it's not just her managing style, but her personality that just leaves me cold.

She disclosed an uncomfortable amount of personal information about her life. For example, I know that her biological father was abusive, I know that her step-father was abusive, I know about her mother's boyfriend, I get lectured on why the death penalty is good (I think it's a personal opinion and you shouldn't discuss things like that at work), that vegetarianism is the best thing in the world, I know about her boyfriend, etc. I don't feel comfortable with these conversations, and when I've said as much in the past, she gets upset with me and makes comments.

I recently got pregnant, and she refers to me as "Crazy Pregnant Lady" - which I think is so rude. I wish she would leave it alone.

As far as work is concerned, she comes into my office to chat whenever she has too much work to do. She forwards messages from HER boss to me, so that I will do her work for her, and then gets angry when I reply directly to her boss rather than giving her the info so she can use my work and claim it as her own.

I'm really thinking about quitting this job, but I'm sure my last 2 weeks will be hell. She recently told me that she needs more than 2 weeks notice - she needs a MONTH'S notice, now.

5 people have come and gone through this job in the last 3 yrs, and now i know why. HELP!
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Old 22nd July 2002, 5:16 PM   #2
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Smile been there so i know what its like

Hi.I certainly know what its like to work with managers.They can be a pain and just rude.Ive had some I dont like.I went and said something and it got passed around in the workplace to the other manager .So now if anyone in the workplace says anything about me I don't like,I ignore it.I cant satand the managers that b*thch about everything when all the employess like me,myself I know are doing my best we can and should get the respect we deserve.

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Old 22nd July 2002, 5:23 PM   #3
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Leave as fast as you can!!!

Depending on your financial situation, either find an job first so you won't have an interuption of cash flow and then quit...or, if you can afford to, give ONLY the required two week's notice now.

Immediately after giving your boss your two week notice, go to her superiors and let them know, in a very kind way, why you are having to leave. You will be doing the company a great favor by letting your boss' superiors know how she operates.

If she gives you the slightest amount of aggravation once you give her your two week notice, tell her to buzz off or you will go to the National Labor Relations Board and report her and you will file sexual harassment charges against her for calling you "the crazy pregnant lady." This is very much against the law!!!

If that doesn't do it, tell her you have an appointment with an attorney to discuss a lawsuit against her. Go see an attorney and have him/her write a letter to your boss and copy the company on just what action you will take if she continues to make life unpleasant for you.

This is a situation you definitely have to get out of or you may end up doing something to her you may definitely regret.
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Old 22nd July 2002, 8:26 PM   #4
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Smile very well put

Dont put up with such harrasement.Tony is right go the labour board.

Hey Tony,[color=black][/color]your post I like much better then mine[color=blue][/color]lol Im not a expert on giving advice but thought I would give it a try!

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Old 23rd July 2002, 3:29 AM   #5
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You don't have to give any notice at all. Although it is the appropriate thing to do and can reflect poorly on you if you don't. Do you need her for a reference? Can someone else in the company be your reference? If it gets really bad when you give your notice, you can always talk to her boss about it. Tell them she is making it very difficult for you to finish your 2 weeks or month.
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Old 24th July 2002, 8:14 PM   #6
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In the meantime of what ever you do, you might want to change your work ethics and be sloppy right along with her. Tomorrow morning when you walk in all bright eyed and bushy tailed say "Hey bitch how was your night". Mess with her back and have fun with it. She might not be able to handle it. I think if she wants to pretend to be friendly and make you believe shes trying to be somewhat friendly, I would give her a slice of her own pie.

You could consider writing a letter to who ever heads up operations explaining that she dumps her work load on you. Explain how because she has nothing better to do that to waste hers and your time talking about her mental problems.In the past has caused other employees prior to you, to quit and now you are too. If your job was to be a counselor you wouldn't have to put in your notice.
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Old 25th July 2002, 1:07 PM   #7
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I told her that I'm going to quit, but I was too nice (as usual) and I gave her a month's notice because she just spazzed out and almost had a stroke when I told her I couldn't handle the stress. I said that it wasn't the job that was stressful - it was her. Lately she's been reading articles on how to manage your employees. Unfortunately, I can't really go to her superior. It's a TINY office, about 11 people work here, and she's not only my manager - she's the accountant. They've gone through so many people in my position that the president doesn't care. Now he wants to make my position part-time (fat chance).
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