Update on internship

[spookie]

What can I say? Middle-class jobs are freaking sweet. It's ridiculous the disparity between amount of effort exerted per buck at blue-collar vs. white-collar jobs.

 

TBH, I expected this gig to suck on most counts. I know I'm in awe right now partly because I don't feel like I deserve this, partly because I feel it's a waste of money, and partly because of where I'm coming from (near-homelessness) but everything's been amazing.

 

I'll start with the arrangements:

 

Not only am I getting paid a ridiculous sum of money / hour (esp. given that I know nothing, so the first couple of weeks are going to be pure training), but the company has provided all the interns free housing at a hotel. We get free breakfast, free dinner with alcoholic beverages, free room service, etc. It's really nice.

 

Then there's the fact that this is insurance, which means that actuarial interns are the sweethearts of the whole company. Everyone is ridiculously nice to us, treats us with a lot of respect, plus we're automatically allowed access to the most selective "clique" in the building. All the actuaries sit together at the long table in the cafeteria, hang out together, and treat everyone else politely, but like they're more important. It's like some fcvked up version of high school in which the misfits magically became popular. I'm not saying I subscribe to these beliefs, but it's kind of funny, and I guess I'd rather be on the inside than the outside.

 

The work isn't boring, and the day is divided up in such a way that I'm never working on the same task for too long. Right now, about half our days are spent in traning rooms being taught things by the other actuaries. What I've been learning has been really interesting, actually. I'm glad the job is going to require so much programming. I've always liked to program. :bunny:

 

I expected the corporate environment to be depersonalized, staunchy, and conservative, but this hasn't been the case. Actually, nearly everyone I've met has just been a really smart but otherwise normal person. There's a wide range of personalities, and everyone is ENCOURAGED to be themselves (as opposed to conforming). In the actuarial departments, I'm pleased to say that even physical personal expression isn't looked down upon: a lot of the actuaries wear pretty much whatever they want, many have piercings, some have tattoo's, etc. I'm glad such superficial things don't hurt people's careers in this track.

 

I've really liked everyone I've met. I'm getting along really well with the other interns (I think I'll even become good friends with a couple of them) and I actually feel grown-up, like all the other adults aren't so intimidating after all. Thank god for my short-lived career as a stripper. I think it really taught me how to relate to people.

 

So, go corporate America, I guess. Yay for sucking corporate dick.

[johan]

Are you going to ask them to "direct deposit" your first paycheck into your waistband while you dance?

 

"Just put it riight here..."

[D-Lish]

Hey!

I am really happy for you!

 

Sounds like a Sweeeet- with a capital "S" deal.

 

Looks like things are looking up!

Have you thought about where you are going to live?

[spookie]

My one qualm is that, as the last-choice intern, I find myself getting stuck with more manual bitch-work than the others. That's understandable, though; I know my resume, as well as my proficiency level with most of the programs, is weaker than the others'. I'm just thankful that I'm being given a chance to prove myself.

[Storyrider]

It sounds like a good time. Cool nerds are the best.

[D-Lish]

Well, I think it's normal to be dispensed the bitch-work initially. It sucks, but it's a chance to prove yourself- which is a good thing.

 

It's exciting eh? I am looking for work after being my own boss for years... and I am excited to get into a new work environment.

 

I am happy for you- it sounds great.

[johan]

I agree with D, Spookie. It's normal to start out on the bottom. They aren't going to try you out on top until you've been at it for a while.

[Citizen Erased]

I agree with D, Spookie. It's normal to start out on the bottom. They aren't going to try you out on top until you've been at it for a while.

 

I love it when you speak dirty.

 

I'm glad you are enjoying it Spookie! Welcome to the dark side

[spookie]

I agree with D, Spookie. It's normal to start out on the bottom. They aren't going to try you out on top until you've been at it for a while.

 

Yah, of course, I realize that. I just mean, even amongst the interns, I'm doing the crappiest work. There's 3 interns in the department and they always assign the others to work on the same task while I do something easier/ more boring. Also, one of the guys managing us treats me nicely, but like a retard. It could be mild sexism maybe (I'm the only girl in the department), or he could have seen my resume, or it could be that I do particularly suck. None of those reasons would surprise me. Likely it's a combo of all three.

 

But I know for a fact that I could get good at all this, and I know if I try, people will notice. I really believe from here on out it's just going to be about curbing my propensity for insanity.

[johan]

..I really believe from here on out it's just going to be about curbing my propensity for insanity.

 

ha ha. That's how it will always be. That's how it is for everyone.

[spookie]

ha ha. That's how it will always be. That's how it is for everyone.

 

You know, you're probably right. And all my life I thought I was special.

[Nevermind]

Congratulations, spookie!

 

It sounds great. Don't worry about getting the easier tasks, it will change soon.

[allina]

Spookie,

I'm so happy for you Don't let this opportunity slip away or I'll have to come kick your ass

[spookie]

Blah.

 

Here's what I'm freaking out about now:

 

I have a 2.3 GPA. My transcript looks like this: A A A A A A A A A C C C C C F F F F F F F F F F. Thanks to a combo of laziness and financial and emotional problems, I failed everything my last two semesters.

 

HR doens't know this. I didn't *lie* about my gpa, but at the time they internviewed me, it was a little higher, in the reasonable range (2.8). I signed off allowing them to contact my school, but I know they haven't done that: my grades (or even my enrollment) have never been verified. My offer was contingent on a drug test, but not the verification of grades.

 

Well, on Thursday, a bunch of actuaries took all the interns out to dinner. Amongst them was "Jeff", someone who's been prodding me about my past since I got here. (On my resume, I mentioned the stripping thing, and worked my cover letter to turn that into a "positive", and I guess everyone's seen it, and "Jeff" seems to want to know wtf.) Jeff sat opposite me and all through dinner through names at me of people in Texas' act sci department. Well, guess what... I never went to school, especially the last year, so I don't even know who the fcvk my professors were supposed to have been. I tried to dodge his questions but when they kept coming I decided to do what I do best and lie. I said I did know "Brian". Then "Jeff said, "That's funny, because we asked "Brian" if he knew you, and he didn't."

 

Then I excused myself to go to the bathroom (where I took a few shots of tequila).

 

Now I'm afraid Jeff will ask HR to verify my enrollment/grades, and that once the "truth" comes out I'll be terminated. Is that feasible? Likely? Or am I just paranoid, again?

 

Also, I did something retarded Friday night. My roommate, another intern, and a bunch of youngish act. sci. people from other companies went bowling aka drinking. I got so nervous I downed - literally - an entire 750 mL bottle of vodka by myself and then had some beers at the alley. I'm such an experienced alcoholic that I bet I could pass a field sobriety test if pressed to do so right when I'm about to pass out, so I don't think anyone even caught on that I was more drunk than them, but I don't remember what we did after, how I got home, or much of what was said.

[jerbear]

I think "jeff" is trying to either blackmail you or get some.

 

"Jeff" can goto HR to verify the transcripts if that was part of the internship agreement. Regarding termination, I think "Jeff" is leaning toward something.

 

Was "Jeff" part of the interview committee?

 

I would suggest reducing your alcohol intake since you are an intern.

[spookie]

I think "jeff" is trying to either blackmail you or get some.

 

"Jeff" can goto HR to verify the transcripts if that was part of the internship agreement. Regarding termination, I think "Jeff" is leaning toward something.

 

Was "Jeff" part of the interview committee?

 

I would suggest reducing your alcohol intake since you are an intern.

 

What do you think he's leaning towards? Ugh this is making me really nervous.

 

Can they fire me if I never lied about my grades? The issue is that I don't think they ever realized how bad they really are.

[jerbear]

What do you think he's leaning towards? Ugh this is making me really nervous.

 

Can they fire me if I never lied about my grades? The issue is that I don't think they ever realized how bad they really are.

 

Was "Jeff" trying to learn more about the stripping thing?

 

What "Jeff" is doing is a gray area of HR. He might be up to something or nothing. My gut feeling is that he is up to something due to the prying, digging, and hanging around you.

 

He is trying to trap you. I would suggest that if there are any private business meetings with "Jeff" Keep things social and professional.

[spookie]

Was "Jeff" trying to learn more about the stripping thing?

 

What "Jeff" is doing is a gray area of HR. He might be up to something or nothing. My gut feeling is that he is up to something due to the prying, digging, and hanging around you.

 

He is trying to trap you. I would suggest that if there are any private business meetings with "Jeff" Keep things social and professional.

 

Ugh.

 

He's not an HR person and he's not even in my department. All the prying has occurred at lunch and at these social types of gatherings. On top of quizzing me about my school, he's asked questions like, "What do your parents do?" which he hasn't asked the other interns, and which seem irrelevent to me unless he's trying to get me to open up about what exactly happened to get me started on being a stripper. Maybe I'm reading too much into it though cause I'm crazy?

 

To get access to my transcript (if that's what he suspects is fishy) he'd have to go to HR and request that they contact my school. Doesn't that seem like a lot of effort?

 

I doubt he's trying to trap me to get laid. He's married with four little children.

 

I'm doing a really good job at the actual job. It's all this extraneous s!ht's that stressful.

[johan]

You aren't obligated to talk to him. Questions about your personal life and past are completely optional for you to answer. Don't let this guy get to you. Just don't converse with him anymore.

 

As far as HR goes, they are probably not going to be inclined to dig deeper into your history just because "Jeff" has some issues. It was their responsibility to have all their facts straight before they brought you on. It wouldn't look good for them to turn around and decide you aren't worthy of the internship, because they would have to admit they didn't do their jobs in the first place. Not to mention he's just going to look like a meddler if he starts going around behind your back trying to mess around with your job. HR won't appreciate the help very much.

 

As far as I can tell, you didn't lie about anything. In fact you were brave to put the stripping thing on your resume. As long as you haven't told any lies, it's not your job to make them go look for the things that you think are bad that they never bothered to go find out on their own. If it was important, then it was their job to go get the information or ask you for it. So it's not important.

 

You're there because you met their criteria, and you're doing a good job. It will only help you if you can learn to relax.

[spookie]

You aren't obligated to talk to him. Questions about your personal life and past are completely optional for you to answer. Don't let this guy get to you. Just don't converse with him anymore.

 

As far as HR goes, they are probably not going to be inclined to dig deeper into your history just because "Jeff" has some issues. It was their responsibility to have all their facts straight before they brought you on. It wouldn't look good for them to turn around and decide you aren't worthy of the internship, because they would have to admit they didn't do their jobs in the first place. Not to mention he's just going to look like a meddler if he starts going around behind your back trying to mess around with your job. HR won't appreciate the help very much.

 

As far as I can tell, you didn't lie about anything. In fact you were brave to put the stripping thing on your resume. As long as you haven't told any lies, it's not your job to make them go look for the things that you think are bad that they never bothered to go find out on their own. If it was important, then it was their job to go get the information or ask you for it. So it's not important.

 

You're there because you met their criteria, and you're doing a good job. It will only help you if you can learn to relax.

 

Thanks johan. The only thing I've lied about was "knowing" Brian, but even in that situation, it wasn't a complete lie since I do know exactly who he is, I've just never spoken to him.

 

TBH I'm shocked HR never bothered to check my school status or my grades. They did check about my actuarial exams, which I guess imply that I should know what I'm doing, but still; I could have been anyone.

[jerbear]

Ugh.

 

He's not an HR person and he's not even in my department. All the prying has occurred at lunch and at these social types of gatherings. On top of quizzing me about my school, he's asked questions like, "What do your parents do?" which he hasn't asked the other interns, and which seem irrelevent to me unless he's trying to get me to open up about what exactly happened to get me started on being a stripper. Maybe I'm reading too much into it though cause I'm crazy?

 

To get access to my transcript (if that's what he suspects is fishy) he'd have to go to HR and request that they contact my school. Doesn't that seem like a lot of effort?

 

I doubt he's trying to trap me to get laid. He's married with four little children.

 

I'm doing a really good job at the actual job. It's all this extraneous s!ht's that stressful.

 

Never know, about the getting laid part. He is a guy and has been prying alot.

 

If "Jeff" is not part of HR and asking very personal questions especially asking about parents, that is crossing the line.

 

I would leave him alone and just let him be. Keep the conversations business and when the job is done continue your work.

 

HR not checking the grades, it is usually part of policy but there are other ways to check; i.e. certification, actuary test check, etc... many certifications and some tests have requirements so HR gets lazy by just asking for a copy of a transcript or diploma.

 

"Jeff" is being a pain, I would keep him on at a business relationship. No happy hour with him.

[spookie]

Tonight, at another company function, this guy I work with, who's not my supervisor but basically oversees everything I do and gives me work, said, "Do you like to party, Spookie? You look like you really like to party."

 

I had no idea how to answer that one, or how, from my button-downed, makeup-free appearance, he could have drawn that. We were sitting across from each other at a steakhouse, and while he was throwing back his third martini with this ribeye, I was sipping on water and eating a vegetarian sandwich.

 

A few minutes later, he said, "You put down that you worked at a bar on your resume?"

 

I said, "No, a strip club."

 

"What did you do?" he asked. As though he didn't know.

 

So I told him, looking him right in the eye so he'd get uncomfortable.

 

I don't get it, if I'm such a big joke to these people, why the hlel did they hire me? The way I see it, the joke's on them. I'm the one getting paid.

[Prodigal Princess]

Surely you can't be surprised at the reaction of suits to the fact that you used to be a stripper.

 

Unfortunately, these guys dont see you as a professional, they see you as a potential f8ck. You'll have to really kick arse in your position, and not get drunk at work functions, in order to gain the respect of these denigrating Average Joes.

[johan]

The guys you work with seem like idiots. I wouldn't socialize with them too much. I also agree that maintaining your sobriety when they're around is an excellent policy. You are going to have to carry the burden of your past around for a while, and you'll have to learn to rise above it.

[Citizen Erased]

Surely you can't be surprised at the reaction of suits to the fact that you used to be a stripper.

 

Unfortunately, these guys dont see you as a professional, they see you as a potential f8ck. You'll have to really kick arse in your position, and not get drunk at work functions, in order to gain the respect of these denigrating Average Joes.

 

Exactly. I am impressed that Spookie is so open about this, it is never a great idea to start out relationships with lies. But, these guys clearly have no respect for her because they are horny, bored, over-worked bland men.

 

So ignore the pigs, do not drink on the job, social or otherwise, and work your little bum off. If you don't give them cause to gossip or be sleazes, it will stop.