I look so young, Will others take me seriously?

[nashua]

Hi

 

I'm 31 and just beginning Grad school to become an Expressive Arts therapist. I have two concerns. The first is that I look extremely young for my age. I get carded everytime I order a drink, and once, when I went skiing, the ticketing guy asked me if was under 16 to get the child rate!!! Can you belive that? Anyway, Do you think, as a therapist, people will have a hard time taking me serioulsy becuase I look so young and they would assume I am not experienced enough?

 

My second issue is that I do not want kids and am uncertain if I ever want to be married. Is becoming a Marriage and Family Therapist a ridiculous idea for someone who might never have their own experience?

 

Thanks for the feedback. I love you guys!

[sb129]

I am 30 and I actually miss the days when people told me I looked too young to be a dentist.

[Lauriebell82]

I am a therapist and i look young as well..of course I am young, only 25. I work with adults, some twice my age, right now and I can tell you that they actually do take me seriously. I have worked with adolescents before, and that was more of a struggle because they viewed me more as a friend then as a therapist. So it may just depend on the age group you are working with. But everyone's experience is different.

 

And about them marriage and family issue..no I don't think that it will make a difference that you don't have a husband or family. That doesn't mean you can't be an effective therapist. You have to recognize that you aren't going to have the same experiences with every client. I work with dual diagnosis clients, if you know what that is, and I haven't had an expereince with addiction that every client has. Yes, you can't relate to their exact situation, but you know the appropirate interventions to use. And you could alwasy throw some other experience in there. Like if you have cousins, or newphews, or have been around a child or family, you could use that experience to relate.

 

I wouldn't worry too much though, just because you haven't had the EXACT same experience, you can still relate to your clients with other expreiences that you have had.

[Laptop2008]

Hi

 

I'm 31 and when I went skiing, the ticketing guy asked me if was under 16 to get the child rate!!!

 

You got me laugh out loud!

 

I assume you're a female, right? Ever asked out by some teenage boys?

[nashua]

You got me laugh out loud!

 

I assume you're a female, right? Ever asked out by some teenage boys?

 

 

Never been asked out by teenagers, no. Ironically though, my boyfriend is 29 years older than me. Imagine what that looks like!

[Laptop2008]

Never been asked out by teenagers, no. Ironically though, my boyfriend is 29 years older than me. Imagine what that looks like!

 

Laughing out loud. I am sorry...this is just bizzare.

 

So, he is around 60 years old? And you look 16? If you're just holding hands, people would just assume father/daughter or even grandpa/granddauther relationship, but if you're kissing in public...people might get the police involved.

 

Do you both get discount at the movie theather? One for kids' rate and the other for senior citizen? ....I am sorry, I got carry away and getting mean now. Hey, you're both adults and if you're both happy and your family supports it, good for you.

Edited February 23, 2008 by Laptop2008

[Curmudgeon]

Never been asked out by teenagers, no. Ironically though, my boyfriend is 29 years older than me. Imagine what that looks like!

 

It must look like my youngest daughter and I would look to others if we appeared to be anything other than what we are -- father and daughter. She's 20 and I'm 61.

 

As for the rest, your appearance would have nothing to do with my level of trust or reliance but your life experience most certainly would if I was looking for a therapist. There is no way you, as a MFT, could relate to my background or perspective and I'd search for someone much closer to my age who, if in a relationship, was in a more age-appropriate one by my reckoning. I also have a daughter your age.

[amymarieca]

Oh my gosh, I am 26 and I wish I would still get carded at the liquor store! I would look at your appearance as a blessing.

 

I get the same thing at my job though. Since I am only 26, I can tell that people do not really want to trust my decisions right away (I work a more authoritarian job). One thing you need to remember is that when people sense even a hint of a lack of confidence, they will eat you alive. If you come across as a strong, confident, and powerful woman, you won't be looked down upon.

[Lauriebell82]

Oh my gosh, I am 26 and I wish I would still get carded at the liquor store! I would look at your appearance as a blessing.

 

I get the same thing at my job though. Since I am only 26, I can tell that people do not really want to trust my decisions right away (I work a more authoritarian job). One thing you need to remember is that when people sense even a hint of a lack of confidence, they will eat you alive. If you come across as a strong, confident, and powerful woman, you won't be looked down upon.

 

That's what I think as well. As a therapist, a client would probably be more apt to pick up on your low self-esteem rather than your youthful looks. I look young like I said, and I work with clients twice my age, but I am confident in my ability as a therapist. Also, although I am younger and maybe haven't had the same experiences as all the clients, I think they take me seriously because I am confident with the fact that I know what I'm doing and can genuinly make them feel like I can help them.