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When should I tell my employers about my pregnancy?


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I'm 13 weeks along, at the end of my first trimester. Although I had some cramps last night I feel like this is a viable pregnancy (crosses fingers). Now I've been wondering when I should tell my employer about my pregnancy...

 

I work in an accounting firm and tax season just started. To say that people get testy and cranky around here during these 4 months is an understatement. Right now, everything is pretty chill but it escalates leading up to april until people are staying here 10-12 hours a day and getting generally pissy.

 

Around the end of tax season I will be finishing up my second trimester and will obviously be showing. I was thinking of waiting until april to say anything but I will probably be pretty big by then, at the 6 months mark....and plus that doesn't give my employer much time to prepare for my maternity leave.

 

Any advice?

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My advice is tell them now. What's the big deal? Being pregnant does not affect your brain or your ability to do your job! :rolleyes: With all the escalating stress going on at the office during this busy season, you don't need the added stress of unnecessarily hiding your pregnancy from colleagues and management.

 

Do they have some kind of unwritten "preganancy policy" in the office or something? (It would have to be "unwritten" since that would open up a whole new legality can of worms!!!)

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I would tell them now. Do you have aplan. Do you know how much maternity leave your are planning on taking. Also if you tell them now you can find out what the HR policies are. How much paid leave you get at what percentage etc....

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I would tell them now. Do you have aplan. Do you know how much maternity leave your are planning on taking. Also if you tell them now you can find out what the HR policies are. How much paid leave you get at what percentage etc....

 

There have been two women in the office who had babies in the last year. One of them has worked here for 5+ years, and she took 3 months off. The other had just started working here, and she only took 6 weeks off. I was hoping to be able to take 2 months off, rather than 3. I do payroll tax returns and there is an Oct 31 deadline that I have to be here to meet.

 

I'm nervous about telling them for some reason. Everyone at work likes me, but they sort of created my position just for me and I don't want to seem like I'm ungrateful. Personally I would have rather waited a year or two to get pregnant but hey, what can I do now?

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I don't want to seem like I'm ungrateful.

 

Unless you work for a fairly heartless, ruthless company, I highly doubt they will see it that way. You are having a baby, not going off on a glorious vacation. :p Explain why you want that amount of time, and then just discuss the game plan of how you intend to meet your October deadline when you get back from leave. If you go in prepared and gearing your conversation toward the greater good of the company's interests, I think they would be impressed. ;)

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Also, is there some way you can do some of the work at home? You could dedicate "baby nap time" to doing a little work at a time while you're on leave to better ensure you meet your deadline. If the company sees this dedication, I think they would also be very pleased.

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I'm nervous about telling them for some reason.

Congrats on your pregnancy! Sending wishes that all goes well, in every aspect.

 

Is your nervousness that you're (subconsciously?) expecting a sort of "not good" response from them? Perhaps you can work through some of the scenarios before announcing your news, so you'll feel better prepared no matter HOW they respond?

 

Or just make a mental note of what you want to include when you tell them -- like you're planning to be back for the October deadline -- and anything else that they might worry about...AFTER they express their excitement for you and offer their good wishes, that is :)

 

It's sounds as if you are very dedicated and conscientious -- I can see why they created a space to keep you on their team!

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Also, is there some way you can do some of the work at home? You could dedicate "baby nap time" to doing a little work at a time while you're on leave to better ensure you meet your deadline. If the company sees this dedication, I think they would also be very pleased.

 

Ah, I wish I could work from home! But it's a big no-no to take client files out of the office, for privacy reasons. But I just assumed that...so maybe I could. It's worth asking, anyways.

 

I also proofread tax returns. I imagine sitting in my cubicle with baby in a carseat sleeping while I pour over tax returns. :laugh:

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Also, is there some way you can do some of the work at home? You could dedicate "baby nap time" to doing a little work at a time while you're on leave to better ensure you meet your deadline. If the company sees this dedication, I think they would also be very pleased.

 

From an employer's point of view, this sucks, sometimes....

 

Tell them as soon as you can. Your job is stressful, and if they need to find as replacement for you, even for a temporary period, hen you owe it to them to give them as much notic as possible.

Baby nap time? The only thing she's going to want to do during baby nap time - is nap herself! It's the only time she'll get to re-charge her own batteries.

No. your only bet is to take your two months off, and then get back into the stream of things.... if that's what you want to do. but IMHO, speaking from experience, even 6 months off work isn't enough.....

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but IMHO, speaking from experience, even 6 months off work isn't enough.....

 

Yeah...my older sisters are both SAHMs. My own mother stayed at home when I was young, as well. I wonder how I'll be able to manage. My SO is planning on staying at home for the 4months following my 2 months, so the baby doesn't have to go directly into daycare.

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My SO is planning on staying at home for the 4months following my 2 months, so the baby doesn't have to go directly into daycare.

 

Blind_otter...

You very kindly came in and contributed to the other thread I have running - you know, the one about having kids in this day and age?

Would you see if you can explain something to me?

 

I would emphasise at this point that I am not out to pick an argument, criticise, judge or condemn.

This is your thread, and I "respect your territory" if you like, although I would never do those things anywhere else either.

But I am just a wee bit curious.

 

You're having a baby.

You're staying home for two months (that's the plan anyway!) and then your SO is staying home a further four to be a home-dad...

 

After this, presumably, your baby will go into day care.

 

Now don't get angry with me, I'm just trying to figure this out....

Why? What's the point?

 

If you're going to have a baby - why give it to other people to influence, bring up and look after?

if either you or your SO can afford to leave work and bring up your own baby yourselves, why not go for that option?

If neither of you can - how can you then afford child-care and go to work?

What is the 'point' in having a child, if you then decide to put it into the care of other people to bring up, and you go to work, and miss out on all that?

 

I'm just trying to illustrate that there seems to be an illogical aspect to this plan....

Can you see what I mean?

Again, I have to emphasise, I'm not trying to be critical.

But I fail to see the logic....

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if either you or your SO can afford to leave work and bring up your own baby yourselves, why not go for that option?

 

We can't afford to have one or the other person stay home.

 

If neither of you can - how can you then afford child-care and go to work?

 

We can afford daycare, if both of us work.

 

What is the 'point' in having a child, if you then decide to put it into the care of other people to bring up, and you go to work, and miss out on all that?

 

 

To be honest this wasn't a planned pregnancy, so I can't go back and undo what has been done. I have to be practical and do what I must to support my family. I don't believe in abortion.

 

This is definitely something I struggle with. I don't think I am the type of woman who can stay at home. I would go crazy. My mother was like that. She really should have just gone back to work after having me. But I really can't think of any other option.

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To be honest this wasn't a planned pregnancy, so I can't go back and undo what has been done. I have to be practical and do what I must to support my family. I don't believe in abortion.

 

Neither do I, in general and on principle - though I'm not out to ever condemn any individual that decides this is her only option....

 

So:

One or other of you can't afford to give up work.

And you can only afford child-care if you BOTH work.

 

What a crappy-do-do situation.

 

I'm sorry, I really am.

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Neither do I, in general and on principle - though I'm not out to ever condemn any individual that decides this is her only option....

 

So:

One or other of you can't afford to give up work.

And you can only afford child-care if you BOTH work.

 

What a crappy-do-do situation.

 

I'm sorry, I really am.

 

It is a bummer. We are hoping that my SO can get work in a town that's about 30 min away, where his parents live. His Dad doesn't work, so grandpa could look after the tater tot. We'll see what happens. I'm optimistic. I know plenty of kids who have been sent to daycare who still love their parents.

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