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How should I deal with bothersome neighbors?


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My neighbors. Where to begin. Well to make a long story short, I simply can't be at home without one of them knocking at the door. Usually it's to tell me something I don't want to hear, or to complain about something.

 

I'm sick of it. I'll be in the middle of something, or you know, just relaxing after a hard day, and Knock knock knock...I have to get up answer the door and listen to one of them.

 

I'd like to put a note on the door that says "Please don't knock on the door, I'm in the middle of something, and can't be disturbed."

 

Is this rude? Or do you think they'll get the point?

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don't answer the door when they knock.

 

I also find not making eye contact works. A quick "Hello, have a nice day" then on your way ...

 

act really busy when you are leaving like you are going to be late for something... "i'm real sorry i cant talk right now, i am in a hurry"

 

Sometimes when I don't want company anymore I will act like I have to take off, but you have to be prepared to actually leave the house and go somewhere (this would only work if u have a car)

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I've tried not answering before. They are VERY persistent. They will resort to banging on the windows to get my attention, and a couple times one of them has even opened the back gate, gone through my back yard, and up to my sliding glass door to look in and try to find me/get my attention.

 

I find their behavior rude, aggressive, and out of line. But they are my neighbors, so I'm trying to keep things as civil as I can. Sigh. I'd like nothing better than to tell them to NEVER knock on the door or speak to me and if they've got something they need to tell me to just leave a note...but again, I'm trying not to be rude. I'd like to handle this the best/most adult way possible.

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"Look, I'm usually exhausted after work so if you don't mind, I'd like some quiet time to myself. I don't mind socializing every-so-often, but not all the time.

 

If I don't answer my door, don't bang on my windows."

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I know you are trying to be as nice and friendly as you can, but them coming into your yard and looking through your door and/or windows is going too far. You can actually call the cops on them for doing that. I'm not saying you should, cause I know you are trying to not resort to that, but if you have to, threaten them that if they do, do that again that you will call the cops and that you are just busy but you promise to get back to them when you have some free time.

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for I am not trying to be nosy. BUT WHAT THE HELL IS SO IMPORTANT FOR THEM TO BE KNOCKING AT THE BACK SLIDER DOOR FOR.

 

No lie I used to have a crack head neighbor that lived behind me come to my door almost everyday asking to use the phone. then would ask for some beers. then one day tried to steal bubble gum out of my car and who knows what else if I didnt come out and stop him. NO FOR REAL HE REALLY WAS A CRACK HEAD

 

Why not coming to the door in a towel? and acting pissed off cuz u were about to take a shower. but i still want to know what is so important.

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Don't answer the door. You're not obligated to. My landlords have a constant habit of ringing my doorbell too. One time they started banging on my door like some classless you know what. Was it an emergancy, guess not bc I never heard anything about it again. They are just plain nosey. I never answer unless I am expecting them or I know who it is.

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Make it clear to them that you find their behavior bothersome and even a bit upsetting. Give them your number, and tell them they can call, and if you don't pick up, it means your busy, and they can leave a message.

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Even better, give them your email address so you don't have to listen to the phone ringing at the most inopportune moment.

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The important thing is to let them know that you don't appreciate them showing up at your home, and to give them an alternative that is more acceptable to you. That gives them an "out" and makes it easier for you to confront them.

 

If they continue to disregard your request, then you have some grounds to escalate the situation, because you warned them.

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What kind of stuff do they complain about? Random stuff you have no control over or stuff like you parked in there space or something? I would probably just not answer and be very distant when you do let them know you have things to get done or had a really bad day at work, etc. And lock the back gate if you're still unable to establish firm boundaries without bad blood.

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  • 3 weeks later...
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thanks for all the replies. They've really helped. Also made me feel a bit vindicated. I'm really tired of the antics. Home is supposed to be where I can relax and instead they've turned it into something else.

 

They bother me for all sorts of things. Like, you're grass is getting long, I could cut it for you if you would pay me XX amount (I usually just call a service to do this for me), or your tree lost some branches last night in the rainstorm, they are laying in the front yard, etc. etc. Or, even...and this really gets me...while you were at work, I power sprayed your drive, put your trash can back from the curb, etc etc. Could you please pay me XX amount? I mean ....it's crazy. I did finally tell the old man who was always doing things w/out being asked and then asking for money not to do anything anymore because I wouldn't have the money with me to pay him! Crazy.

 

they are all retired old people and always out working on their lawns and chatting with one another about everyone else on the street. They spend endless amounts of time on their lawns, while I just call up a service to do this for me.

 

I don't even like it when they knock on the door to socialize now as they are such pests and gossips. I just want to be left alone. I figure I'll leave the note, get locks for the back gates, and try some of the lines that have been mentioned here.

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This is still going on?

 

Time for serious measures. Adjust the sprinklers so they will hit the front door. When they show up at your door, turn them on.

 

And just wait.

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