God or god in a relationship

[Fred34567]

Ok so my wife and I have been together over 5 years. We have never been to church together or even tried to have a relationship with god. A few weeks ago my wife started asking questions about religion and god and had started to want a relationship with god. Me on the other hand doesn't believe in god. I she wants to talk about this journey into god with me. I don't know what to do. If this is something she wants I want her to have it.. I use to go to church and be religious and be head over heals for god. I know all the right things to say and when to say them to encourage her relationship with god but I just can't say them because I don't believe. I tell her that I am toxic to this type of subject that I'm afraid if we talk about it and open up that I will discourage her and hold her back from this walk she will have with god. Well imagine being me a noon believer. By previous relationship was horribly ruined when my fiance cheating on me. The crazy part about it is that it all stated with wanting a relationship with god. I told my ex that I don't want a relationship with god cause I don't believe. Well she meets this guy at college that wants to go with her to a religious book reading and go to church. And one thing led to another and she ends up sleeping with him. I get it. She needed emotional support during this time and I couldn't give it to her because I just don't believe. She oppend up to him and he did likewise. In my book that's the begining of a relationship. Fast forward 7 years and low and behold it's happening again. My wife met some guy at work who happens to go to the same college she does who follows god. She had only been talking to him for a week but I already know how this will end. She stayed after work and talked and "prayed" with him. She hasn't been clear on how long they talked for that night. Over the weekend I was able to look through her text messages and found messages to him saying she thought about him and telling him how her night was. She spent the whole day/night with me we even went star gazing but she never once brought me up on the text messages hell when she told him about the star gazing she said "I went star gazing"....... "I" not "we'. I have expressed my feelings about this to her but she just doesn't care to hear them and starts accusing me of cheating. So today she gets home from the store and tells me she called and talked to this guy and is going to church with him at the college next week. And completely disrespects my wish of not doing/starting this with another man. When I asked her a bout the messages I read she said she was thinking about him because of the whole god thing but not once did she say that In the message. We have 2 kids one is my 2 year old daughter and the other is my stepson. I don't know what to do in this sittuatuion but it all seems so Much like the last time but with kids.

[joystickd]

Thats what happens when you worship Cesare Borgia

[EllyH]

Hi Fred. I'm sorry you are going through this. It seems that you are experiencing two separate issues at the same time that are also intertwined. As a person of faith, I can tell you that a person should not be "fellowshipping" with a person of the opposite sex alone. I'm all for a person learning about, developing and deepening a relationship with Christ (which, by the way, is different than "being religious"), but not at the expense of a spouse. I know this seems like a double-whammy since it seems like history is repeating itself especially with the person mixing religion with extra-curricular activity. I hope you find some peace in all this and for what it's worth, not all Christians are the same :-) Blessings.