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Turn into religion because of guilt and/or social anxiety?


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Have you heard for cases like this?

 

My BF decided to become Christian at his mid 20s, because he used to have no friends? Kind of using the church groups as a meetup for new people.

 

Considering that, I'm just creeped out by his religious outlook... He's always referring to 20's and 30's church groups and how much he enjoys these interactions, for me it sounds disrespectful even to the actually religious people, and purely creepy considering his age (he'll be pushing 40 soon)

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Maybe he was/is looking for a future Christian wife? I don't know the state of your relationship, but perhaps he's holding out to be "equally yoked".

 

Do you share his same faith?

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many marriages split up due to spiritual/religious differences, often this happens later in life when one partner sets off on a new spiritual path. In your case, it sounds like you knew this before getting involved. Did you think you would 'convert' him to your belief system once you became committed?

 

it's ok to not be on board with his religious preferences, but it's not cool to be disrespectful towards him for his spiritual/religious choices. If it 'creeps' you out, perhaps you need to move on.

 

You might consider giving thanks for being able to see this incompatibility now rather than later.

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If so, I wonder why would he hang on me for a whole damn year. I do attend some stuff with him but I made it clear that it is more for the company than because I have the need.

I was raised Christian (tradition-wise) but have never practiced more than attending major holidays.

What will be non-offensive but blunt way to put this on the table?

 

 

Maybe he was/is looking for a future Christian wife? I don't know the state of your relationship, but perhaps he's holding out to be "equally yoked".

 

Do you share his same faith?

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I did knew that it is a thing before we become a couple, yes. However, I didn't know that HE will try with tooth and nail to convert ME. Neither that Christians in the US (I'm European) take it so differently - he seems to be nearly brainwashed by some people participating in "community groups".

 

 

Plus I still don't believe he is Christian by heart. E.g. his political views are very liberal, we live together etc. He seems to use it as a meet-up venue.

 

 

Or maybe he is using this church venues as hookup sites while using me for money and emotional support? Maybe I'm getting way too negative but why would he keep quiet for an YEAR if he wanted to date a churchie? I'm in my 30s, so an year is a big deal for me.

 

 

many marriages split up due to spiritual/religious differences, often this happens later in life when one partner sets off on a new spiritual path. In your case, it sounds like you knew this before getting involved. Did you think you would 'convert' him to your belief system once you became committed?

 

it's ok to not be on board with his religious preferences, but it's not cool to be disrespectful towards him for his spiritual/religious choices. If it 'creeps' you out, perhaps you need to move on.

 

You might consider giving thanks for being able to see this incompatibility now rather than later.

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