'Coming out' as an atheist

[tb24]

I just say if anyone asks about my religious belief (or lack thereof ). But I occasionally get some rather odd reactions.

 

Sometimes people just flatly don't believe me and think I'm joking, other times I get lectures about god. One guy, at university, dragged me into a massive religious debate (seemingly in an attempt to convert me), EVERY TIME he saw me he'd ask me some ridiculous question presumably thinking i'd say "oh! You're right! There is a god!" lol

 

I'm not really interested in debating the existence of mythological creatures but I find it annoying that some people just can't seem to let it go.

 

Any other atheists had this kind of trouble? 99% of people are ok.. but the odd few just seem to really be bothered about it and even treat me differently when they find out.

[Feelin Frisky]

Card-carrying confirmed militant atheist here. Actually, I'm not--I'm only an "atheist" to "them"--other than that I'm just a free-thinking guy.

[quankanne]

live and let live, baby. I'm a believer, but think it's really, really tacky to try to bring someone back into the fold unless that person has specifically asked for my assistance. Otherwise, a good rule of thumb is to live and let live ...

 

'Coming out' as an atheist :laugh::laugh: very clever ... I like that!

[green_tea]

Yes I've had this kind of trouble. Just last week unfortunately got into an argument with so called friends. They kept insisting that I DO "belong" to a religion. Um I think I know if I follow a religion or if I don't. Been atheist ever since I could think for myself.

[LisaLee]

Do atheists really have that much trouble "coming out"? Considering that religion as a whole is on a decline in the U.S. and Europe is riding a very high atheist wave. If anyone gets heckled it's the card carrying Christian, especially the conservative christian, IME.

[TaraMaiden]

It's said by many that even Atheists believe something, so they can be as dogmatic, insistent and vocal as the most ardent Christians. it's happened here....

 

I prefer to label myself a Non-Theist....

I'm a person who is inclined to believe that it really doesn't matter a damn whether a God exists or not.

One way or the other, who knows, and one way or the other, where's your proof?

So I don't sweat it....

 

If anybody knocks on my door, and tells me salvation is through Christ and whatnot, I just say "I'm so glad that you've found something that works for you."

And I close the door.

 

Done.

[tb24]

Do atheists really have that much trouble "coming out"? Considering that religion as a whole is on a decline in the U.S. and Europe is riding a very high atheist wave. If anyone gets heckled it's the card carrying Christian, especially the conservative christian, IME.

 

Nah not difficult, sometimes people's reactions are unexpected, that's all. It's not really a big deal. For instance, a muslim friend of mine thought i was agnostic (no idea why, I'm sure i'd said it before) but one day i said "As an atheist..." and he was surprised and started questioning me about it, yet when he thought i was "agnostic" (By which I mean "Undecided" even though it's not technically correct, but i digress) he didn't seem to care. It didn't really bother him, I just found it kinda funny. I suppose he just couldn't understand my position, as I can't his. Though we're still good friends

 

As I said, most people are fine. There's just a few who obviously can't even comprehend the viewpoint and really struggle to cope, often becoming suddenly very defensive.

[D-Lish]

I had the same trouble as you "coming out".

 

I was young, and my mother forced me to go to church, and I hated everything about it. I could never wrap my logic around it, even from a young age. I met with a lot of BS from some of my family. My aunt even staged an "intervention" when I was about 9 because every Sunday morning I would run out the back door as fast as I could in my Sunday school dress and hide in the woods until my mother would give up on me and go to church. When my brother got old enough to run, he came with me. I came home from school one day and "our Minister" was waiting for me! Guess what I did? haha- ran straight ino the woods.

 

Eventually, I was forced back because my mother threatened that I couldn't play sports or see my friends after school unless I agreed to give church a chance until I was 14, when she'd allow me to make my own decision. faced with a social crisis, I went back to Sunday school. I made myself such a nuisance- asking questions, disrupting things, that I was kicked out of Sunday school.

 

My Mother is much less religious now, at least she's relaxed about pushing it. My Aunt still likes to tell me she knows in her heart that I'll accept her Jesus into my heart one of these days. She's very sick, and her health has deteriorated significantly- but she tells me that nothing would make her happier and settled to know I've found Jesus before she dies.

 

So yes, we do feel pressure for not conforming. I can't tell you how many countless times I've been lectured by someone- even strangers, about my lack of faith. It's insulting.

[quankanne]

she tells me that nothing would make her happier and settled to know I've found Jesus before she dies.

 

those kinds of comments evoke a mixed reaction in me ... on the one hand, I know your aunt wants for you to have the best life possible as she sees it, and that's understandable. She loves you, she wants to make sure you're "safe," spiritually speaking. On the other hand, it's hard to hear someone say that because it presumes they know what's planned for you – that's between you and your Creator, whether you believe in one or not.

 

my cradle Catholic niece "found Jesus" when she married her husband, her thing now is to visit dying relatives to ask if they've been "saved." Ummm – wouldn't it be a more effective witness to live your life so that people can see your belief system than to force it down their throat? I pray for that kid, that she comes to understand that her role in this "salvation" is more than just saying the magic words and WHAM! She's good with God ...

[TaraMaiden]

Consciously or not, that's mere emotional blackmail and manipulation....

[sb129]

live and let live, baby. I'm a believer, but think it's really, really tacky to try to bring someone back into the fold unless that person has specifically asked for my assistance. Otherwise, a good rule of thumb is to live and let live .

 

Nice attitude.

 

 

If anybody knocks on my door, and tells me salvation is through Christ and whatnot, I just say "I'm so glad that you've found something that works for you."

And I close the door.

 

Done.

 

I love it. I tell the people that they have come to the wrong house for conversion, but wish them a happy day anyway. They always look a little bemused that i am so polite about it, I guess they get lots of abuse and doors slammed in their faces.

[Citizen Erased]

I guess I'm more agnostic than anything. Try telling that to your 75 year old, very ill and very Catholic grandmother.

 

I can accept the possibility that God exists, and I hope He does, otherwise life seems a tad bottomless and pointless to me. But my mind is utterly bored with the concept of Jesus and the Bible and that some unseen being is watching our every move and filling our lives with the light of his glorious being and whatnot. It seems terribly unlikely to me and I think religion is the most impressive Man made thing built upon either schizophrenia (the big man in the cloud spoke to me - you'd be given medication for that these days) or lies. The Pyramids are second of course.

 

My children can go to Church or whatever with their father if it's important to him, and they should to make up their own minds on the whole thing, but I won't be joining them. They can have the option of staying at home with me once they are old enough to choose. I won't pretend I believe in something I don't with them.

 

The only thing stopping me from telling my family this is my grandmother. She's disappointed enough I don't go to church.

[skydiveaddict]

I think everyone on this planet should become Roman Catholic, like me:D:D:D:D

Then we'd all be happy forever after, and you all could elect me to be the next pope:cool:!

Edited November 13, 2010 by skydiveaddict

[theBrokenMuse]

I just say if anyone asks about my religious belief (or lack thereof ). But I occasionally get some rather odd reactions.

 

Sometimes people just flatly don't believe me and think I'm joking, other times I get lectures about god. One guy, at university, dragged me into a massive religious debate (seemingly in an attempt to convert me), EVERY TIME he saw me he'd ask me some ridiculous question presumably thinking i'd say "oh! You're right! There is a god!" lol

 

I'm not really interested in debating the existence of mythological creatures but I find it annoying that some people just can't seem to let it go.

 

Any other atheists had this kind of trouble? 99% of people are ok.. but the odd few just seem to really be bothered about it and even treat me differently when they find out.

I've come out as an anti-theist and while I have had issues with some family members it's not that bad up north where I live. I hear the closer you get to the bible belt the more issues you'll find from other people who hear non-believer and instantly think Satan Spawn that must be converted before they infect everyone with their evil.

[LisaLee]

Yes I've had this kind of trouble. Just last week unfortunately got into an argument with so called friends. They kept insisting that I DO "belong" to a religion. Um I think I know if I follow a religion or if I don't. Been atheist ever since I could think for myself.

 

Yes, I usually think of the dogmatic atheists as having a religion unto their own, much in the way Tara described. One of the most popular definitions of religion is that religion is your "ultimate concern" (Tillich). In this light atheism can be someone's religion, especially those atheists who are in-your-face annoying trying to prove there is no God.

 

I've come out as an anti-theist and while I have had issues with some family members it's not that bad up north where I live.

 

Yes! My boyfriend lives in Michigan and there is a HUGE difference between the north and the south. There are no where near as many churches, and Christians up north seem to be more liberal. What religion there is, it is more diverse. Like in my area Catholics are the "exotic" religion.

 

Once when my SO was visiting and we were running errands on a Sunday I told him I wanted to get to the store early to beat the Sunday traffic. He had no clue what I was referring to! I said: "You know, Sunday after noon? The grocery stores and restaurants usually get packed from the church goers getting out of service?"

 

Blank stare. Later he even asked him dad (who spent a lifetime in Michigan) and he had also never heard of the reference. But my boyfriend's mom is a pagan and his dad is into New Age crystal-skulls type stuff, so maybe he was especially sheltered from such things. =/

 

I hear the closer you get to the bible belt the more issues you'll find from other people who hear non-believer and instantly think Satan Spawn that must be converted before they infect everyone with their evil.

It really depends on where you're living. When I lived in a one-stoplight town in the Ozarks of Arkansas that was very much the case. Even the young generation (teenagers, 20somethings) were highly religious, and it was the old fashioned, holy rolling, speaking in tongues kind.

 

I moved to a small city in southern Missouri and although it is still religious it seems to be reserved to the older generation. The young people are either very liberal or are into the mega-churches that start their services with Christian rock music.

 

That Satan Spawn converting that you refer to is still active but very much a dying breed, and reserved to more rural areas.

[Feelin Frisky]

I've come out as an anti-theist and while I have had issues with some family members it's not that bad up north where I live. I hear the closer you get to the bible belt the more issues you'll find from other people who hear non-believer and instantly think Satan Spawn that must be converted before they infect everyone with their evil.

 

Oh good. I'm not the only one who considers him or her self an "anti-theist". I'm not against people who believe, I just think the beliefs often result in dysfunction.

[TaraMaiden]

I think everyone on this planet should become Roman Catholic, like me:D:D:D:D

Then we'd all be happy forever after, and you all could elect me to be the next pope:cool:!

 

Uh-oh.... You know the reputation Catholic priests have unfortunately garnered...

 

Are you trying to tell us something...?

Or would you care to rethink that one, my little wild-blue-yonder-leaper, you?

[tb24]

Oh good. I'm not the only one who considers him or her self an "anti-theist". I'm not against people who believe, I just think the beliefs often result in dysfunction.

 

As I've stated, I'm an atheist but I have seen belief help people. The placebo effect has been proven to work time and time again.

 

Now one could argue that deluding ones self is a bad thing, but if it helps them come to terms with losing a loved one (for example) does it really matter to you that they believe in irrational nonsense? For instance, homoeopathy "works" (insofar as making them feel better) even though it's just placebo. It helps people and I have no problem with that. [n.b. I do have a problem with the big corporations making millions out of it, however]

 

Saying that, as soon as this irrational nonsense starts coming into the bigger picture, for example influencing politics, I am wholly against it.

 

What I don't see the point in, is actively debating/arguing with specific individuals about their beliefs (unless they start it ). It just causes undue stress for both people. As someone already stated, live and let live.

Edited November 13, 2010 by tb24

[Feelin Frisky]

... this irrational nonsense starts coming into the bigger picture, for example influencing politics, I am wholly against it.

 

.. I don't...actively debating/arguing ....

 

This + I'm not into arguing the placebos or what not either.

[theBrokenMuse]

Now one could argue that deluding ones self is a bad thing, but if it helps them come to terms with losing a loved one (for example) does it really matter to you that they believe in irrational nonsense?

It does to me. Our beliefs don't exist in a vacuum. They influence our actions.

 

For instance, homoeopathy "works" (insofar as making them feel better) even though it's just placebo. It helps people and I have no problem with that. [n.b. I do have a problem with the big corporations making millions out of it, however]

It might help them shake that annoying headache or backache with the placebo effect, sure. The bigger picture is that there are now people forgoing REAL medical treatment for serious ailments because they've been duped into thinking this stuff is for real, or worse, stop getting real medical treatments for their children. As far as I am concerned the practitioners of homeopathy are as bad as

or

. Edited November 13, 2010 by theBrokenMuse

[green_tea]

Yes, I usually think of the dogmatic atheists as having a religion unto their own, much in the way Tara described. One of the most popular definitions of religion is that religion is your "ultimate concern" (Tillich). In this light atheism can be someone's religion, especially those atheists who are in-your-face annoying trying to prove there is no God.

 

The friends who said I was part of a religion weren't saying they considered atheism a religion, they were trying to tell me that everyone is born into a religion, which is that of their parents. Don't know what religion they would consider a child of two different religions however.

[sb129]

For instance, homoeopathy "works" (insofar as making them feel better) even though it's just placebo. It helps people and I have no problem with that. [n.b. I do have a problem with the big corporations making millions out of it, however.

 

You can't have one without the other though. if people are going to buy into it, even if its not for "real", someone is going to make lots of money. I object to people making money from snake oil.

 

I

 

It might help them shake that annoying headache or backache with the placebo effect, sure. The bigger picture is that there are now people forgoing REAL medical treatment for serious ailments because they've been duped into thinking this stuff is for real, or worse, stop getting real medical treatments for their children. As far as I am concerned the practitioners of homeopathy are as bad as

or

.

 

Agreed.

[tb24]

It might help them shake that annoying headache or backache with the placebo effect, sure. The bigger picture is that there are now people forgoing REAL medical treatment for serious ailments because they've been duped into thinking this stuff is for real, or worse, stop getting real medical treatments for their children. As far as I am concerned the practitioners of homeopathy are as bad as

or

.

 

Ok I see your point! I was thinking about people using homeopathy for minor ailments not for real, potentially life threatening medical conditions! You're 100% correct and actually that's quite worrying. You've just changed my perspective completely.

[sb129]

It makes me SO mad when people prevent their children from getting access to proper medical care because of "alternative therapies".

 

I think it borders on abuse. As does indoctrinating them with visions of hell and brimstone from a young age if they "sin".

 

Growing up in fear can't be a good thing.

[theBrokenMuse]

It makes me SO mad when people prevent their children from getting access to proper medical care because of "alternative therapies".

Or when they decide that prayer alone should be enough then wonder why they now have a dead infant whose life could have been saved with a simple shot of antibiotics. It kills me, just kills me that babies are being allowed to slowly die by those who are supposed to protect them in order to preserve their own faith.