Jump to content

It's Not You: 27 (Wrong) Reasons You're Single


Recommended Posts

Eternal Sunshine

I just have to say that I read this book and love it. It kind of points out that often we are trying too hard to figure out what's wrong with us. At the same time, there are women with hard-core mental illnesses (that actually keep getting hospitalized for it) and truckload of issues having no problem finding a long term relationship.

 

I am currently happily single but that feeling of "what the hell is wrong with you?" hangs over me every time I mention it to someone else. It's one of those things that are in "life is not fair" category. Like when some people get cancer or get hit by a car, just by pure chance. Those that met their partner and are genuinely "in love" without even trying don't have any special skills. They just got lucky. Seriously, if you never had to make an online dating profile, take a moment to feel blessed.

 

Many often like to give you smug advice about how you need to "improve" and become some version of "the perfect human being" before you are "worthy" of love. Ha. The simplicity of this book is just beautiful.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Like when some people get cancer or get hit by a car, just by pure chance. Those that met their partner and are genuinely "in love" without even trying don't have any special skills. They just got lucky. Seriously, if you never had to make an online dating profile, take a moment to feel blessed.

 

That entire set of false assumptions may have something to do with your relationship struggles, whether real or perceived. It's like saying Bill Gates, Tom Brady or Ruth Bader Ginsburg were just fortunate. As the saying goes, luck is the residue of design...

 

Mr. Lucky

Link to post
Share on other sites

IMHO there is some luck involved, but in my experience it has far more to do with a person's predisposition, personality or skill set. Some people are good at relationships, and you may be good at being single. (And I don't mean that in a negative way, as some people would accept any partner to avoid being alone. It also means that you are obviously able to handle your own responsibilities.)

 

If you are happy being single, that's all that counts in the end.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...