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Does anyone else hate houseguests?


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WasOtherWoman

This is terrible, but i HATE having house guests. I would be ok if people would come and visit, but sleep in a hotel and have breakfast there. They would be then welcome to come back and spend the day. (ha, but please leave at bedtime)

 

I wish i could feel differently, i really do... but i hate every.single.minute of guests.

 

Anyone else hate it with a passion?

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I never really minded but we overwhelmingly had pleasant and generous guests.

 

My compromise now is, at my new place I have a couple RV sites and guests are welcome to park their RV's, hook up and enjoy the local ambiance and scenery. We get together to do stuff and they retire to their RV for personal time. I guess that's kind of like a hotel but closer by.

 

My best friend has an open invitation to anyone in our social circle to stay in the apartment at their beach home. All one needs to do is drive over there when they're around. They handle the rest. Some houseguests have been better than others, or so I've heard ;)

 

Our most memorable, and best behaved/appointed, houseguests were the daughters of a couple of my wife's friends in Australia. They were college age and a pure joy to host and be around. They stopped and spent a few days on a tour of the west coast of the US. Mostly they stayed in hotels but we fit in as hosts so we put them up and took them to Yosemite on the day after New Years for a day of snow play, something they never see in Australia where they live.

 

Anyway, people vary widely and yeah I've heard some doozy stories but never really have had a bad experience myself as a host.

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WasOtherWoman

The RV sites is brilliant! I suppose we could do the same, as we are on the ocean and have a great dock with hookups. Unfortunately, most folks don't come by water :(. We used to keep our boat for guests, but recently sold it.

 

It is not even like i have bad experiences to cite. I just truly hate people being in my personal space. Upon their arrival I am counting the days until they leave.

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Happy Lemming
This is terrible, but i HATE having house guests. I would be ok if people would come and visit, but sleep in a hotel and have breakfast there.

 

100% AGREE!!

 

I also hate making different meals because those guests are being picky. I would really like to say "I'm making pancakes for breakfast, if you don't want them, go out for breakfast..."

 

And no, its not terrible to dislike house guests, in my opinion!!

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WasOtherWoman

THANK YOU!! Everyone keeps saying "you need to get over it". I say "WHY?"

I don't cook, I have this crazy pristine kitchen that I don't want used.....so i certainly don't want anyone messing it up.

 

I KNOW it is crazy to be this way....but yet, it is the way i am.

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How we always handled the meals thing was anyone was welcome to join us and, if special dietary issues prevented that, we understood. Also, when I'd BBQ, if someone had something they wanted cooked, no problem. That's pretty much how my friends who routinely entertain do it as well. Meals were/are generally informal and the kitchen or outdoor cooking area was available as desired. That diffuses the picky houseguest thing. People who don't get the message aren't invited back.

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Happy Lemming
THANK YOU!! Everyone keeps saying "you need to get over it". I say "WHY?"

I don't cook, I have this crazy pristine kitchen that I don't want used.....so i certainly don't want anyone messing it up.

 

I KNOW it is crazy to be this way....but yet, it is the way i am.

 

I keep my kitchen quite clean, as well. When I cook it usually takes me a good amount of time to clean everything up, pre-wash the pans, load the dishwasher, wipe down the stove, countertops, dining room table, trivets, etc. The last thing I want to hear is some special order, like I'm a short order cook or something.

 

If you don't like the way I cook your eggs, get in here and do it yourself.

 

As a side note, I don't sleep as well when there are other people in my home, roaming around at night.

 

I'm with you, stay in the motel down the street, eat at the diner (next door) and I'll meet you at 11:00am for the activities we discussed.

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we're fairly quiet folks, so having someone come stay is a big deal. I don't mind visiting, but I hate the part where you've got to entertain 24/7, even though I love my friends, you know?

 

told our one friend - a guy - that he's really the only houseguest I enjoy having over, because he splits time hanging out with both of us, so I still can bury my nose in a book while he's having beers with my husband. And husband likes that i've got someone reliable in the car with me if we decide on a quick roadtrip, because he (husband) has a bad back and doesn't like long rides!

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WasOtherWoman
I hate it with a passion. Nor do I want to go and spend the night at their house.

 

Absolutely NOT! I always stay in hotels.... I would sooner die than stay in someone's house!

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WasOtherWoman
I keep my kitchen quite clean, as well. When I cook it usually takes me a good amount of time to clean everything up, pre-wash the pans, load the dishwasher, wipe down the stove, countertops, dining room table, trivets, etc. The last thing I want to hear is some special order, like I'm a short order cook or something.

 

If you don't like the way I cook your eggs, get in here and do it yourself.

 

As a side note, I don't sleep as well when there are other people in my home, roaming around at night.

 

I'm with you, stay in the motel down the street, eat at the diner (next door) and I'll meet you at 11:00am for the activities we discussed.

 

Yes, i hear that also. I can't sleep, because when we are in bed, there is no noise or movement in the rest of the house. I hate hearing people wandering around, etc. Regarding our kitchen phobia... ha... I think that is why i don't want to deal with breakfast. We can't barbecue it and i don't want to mess up the kitchen.

 

I do love seeing people, but yes, they should stay in the motel and meet later in the morning or activities!! I actually would not even mind if they came over at 11 to go boating, or swimming, or whatever. Even stay for an early dinner, because it can be bbq'd. But - when bedtime comes... out you go!!!

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This is terrible, but i HATE having house guests. I would be ok if people would come and visit, but sleep in a hotel and have breakfast there. They would be then welcome to come back and spend the day. (ha, but please leave at bedtime)

 

I wish i could feel differently, i really do... but i hate every.single.minute of guests.

 

Anyone else hate it with a passion?

 

Not really. Usually if I am inviting people to my home, I like them enough that I don't mind them spending the night.

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Depends on the houseguest. But I can see it. It can be a lot of pressure. Plus you have to keep your bra on all day, which is a dealbreaker for me.

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Depends on the houseguest. But I can see it. It can be a lot of pressure. Plus you have to keep your bra on all day, which is a dealbreaker for me.

 

lol, I only invite people with the understanding that I am not going to be wearing a bra. The fact that I put on pants for these people is enough tbh :lmao:

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treehugger12

I would also say depends on the house guests, I’ve had some that are great and some not so much but overall I don’t like it, I don’t like my world (my cave) disrupted at all, I actually get anxiety about it. My home is the one place I can be myself and let loose. Sleeping at night is a biggie because I have no children and always had a qwiet home, so when we go to bed, it’s lights out and I don’t want anyone walking around or making any noise what so ever, which happened with one guest I had, he was up all hours of the night, in and out of the restroom, every time he made noise, my dog would bark because he wasn’t used to this guy being in our home wandering all night. I like my space, especially after working all day, I definitely want my alone time.

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WasOtherWoman
I would also say depends on the house guests, I’ve had some that are great and some not so much but overall I don’t like it, I don’t like my world (my cave) disrupted at all, I actually get anxiety about it. My home is the one place I can be myself and let loose. Sleeping at night is a biggie because I have no children and always had a qwiet home, so when we go to bed, it’s lights out and I don’t want anyone walking around or making any noise what so ever, which happened with one guest I had, he was up all hours of the night, in and out of the restroom, every time he made noise, my dog would bark because he wasn’t used to this guy being in our home wandering all night. I like my space, especially after working all day, I definitely want my alone time.

 

YEP, this is a big part of it for me also. I don't want people in my "private sanctuary". I hate disruption, i hate people touching / moving my stuff.

I am nuts, clearly...

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I had a houseguest sleeping on the living room sleeper sofa for a few days, and I enjoyed the visit. I had a new dog I'd only had 2 months, and it bothered me because she kept wanting to sleep with the guest to keep an eye on her and I wanted to snuggle with her. And I woke up in the morning and she wasn't by my side, so I crept into the living room and Myra was sitting by the guests knees staring at her. So I quietly called her and that woke the guest up and as soon as she came to, Myra was right up in her face giving her kisses.

 

I probably had the better end of that visit, between me and the houseguest.

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We don't like house guests, even if they're family. Wife's son just left after a visit, and we're both relieved he's gone. We find it very stressful and disruptive to our happy routine, even when we like the person and they're not obnoxious. He also has a dog, well behaved and friendly, but still intrusive, requires too much attention, and adds a level of fur and grime we don't like.

 

We will actively discourage future visits from anyone, perhaps excepting her mother, whom we both like and who has minimal impact on our routine. Even then, a week would be pushing our limits.

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We also would rather not have overnight guest but would not say that aloud to anyone for we feel bad about feeling that way. One in particular is a close cousin of mine that will plop all his stuff on the dining room table, plant himself in the lounger and that's where he will camp out. Might as well convert the spare bedroom complete with Satellite TV into something useful.

 

 

 

We like most have a home routine we got to really enjoy after the kids and the herd of their friends moved on. We enjoy the freedom of our naturalist lifestyle and that certainly is something that is hampered.

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Yup! It just disrupts my lifestyle... It's the small things that bug me. E.g. I do NOT have 'meal' dinner usually, I eat a pint of ice cream or cereals without the milk or something that doesn't require any thermal preparation (just hate turning the stove at night). Of course this doesn't fly with guests . I also do NOT like to wear clothes (ok maybe some slip here and there) at home at night and this obviously is a no go with guests :D Plus my night time shows are guests-inappropriate - I like to watch medical stuff primarily and people get grossed out :D Just generally I feel exhausted when I had visitors regardless of who it was, even close family members.

 

 

This is terrible, but i HATE having house guests. I would be ok if people would come and visit, but sleep in a hotel and have breakfast there. They would be then welcome to come back and spend the day. (ha, but please leave at bedtime)

 

I wish i could feel differently, i really do... but i hate every.single.minute of guests.

 

Anyone else hate it with a passion?

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This is actually a hard limit for me - barring emergencies, I won't have anyone staying the night at our house for more than one night. I value my privacy and space far too much, and I have difficulty enough sleeping as it is. Even one night is really stretching it, and we only agreed to that one because a really good friend straight up asked, lol. I would never offer it.

 

 

Nor do I ever want to accept these offers and I really wish people wouldn't insist! I'd much rather pay for a motel room and have my private space.

 

 

 

That being said we have done housesitting for a friend while they were overseas, and that was nice.

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I have twice been a houseguest in LA, both for exchange programmes with organisations in NZ. I hope I wasn't a burden to them!

 

 

The first family I stayed with were amazing, they were wonderful hosts and cooked several lovely meals for us, we cooked some of our kiwi dishes for them too. They came and stayed with us in NZ a couple of years later, and we're still in contact to this day.

 

 

The second family I stayed with cooked once in the entire 3 weeks I was there, hotdogs on the BBQ with paper plates....I wonder if they ever use their kitchen? Reading your comments, I'm now wondering if they were scared to dirty the kitchen like you?

 

 

We regularly stay with friends and family or have them to stay with us, but we take our Motorhome to stay in or offer it to our guests when they're at our place. We are also naturists, a lot of our friends are too and a few of our family members, so that doesn't stop us!!

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I have twice been a houseguest in LA, both for exchange programmes with organisations in NZ. I hope I wasn't a burden to them!

 

 

People who sign up for those programmes are by definition OK with house guests, otherwise they wouldn't sign up. I wouldn't worry about it. ;)

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bathtub-row

If you hate it that much, then you shouldn’t let people stay over. It’s your home. You have the right to do as you please.

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I've never had houseguests really, but would love to have some... for a short period. Being me though, I wouldn't bend over backwards to make them comfortable... there'd be no cooking special meals because of a picky eater and if they didn't like it I guess they would just never come back which would be fine with me. But... depending on who I was entertaining I would probably find it enjoyable.

 

I think it would defeat the purpose to make them leave to sleep in a hotel or to leave for meals.

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