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How to stop Facebook stalking


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mortensorchid

I can admit this, I'm sure everyone else has done this at some point or another. You stalk people on Facebook all the time. We have our reasons for doing it, mostly for the same reasons we stalk others if the internet, social networking, etc. did not exist. Because you want to see what they're doing and who they're doing it with.

 

I've written about this situation before - I had a thing for a coworker a few years ago. After I was no longer working at the place, I texted him "Want to hang out?" after I had put a present in his box at work annoymously and gotten his number. He texted back "I am not interested in you romantically". I straitened my cuffs and lapels, went Daniel Craig as James Bond cold, and said "Well love makes you fat doesn't it?" I erased his number, no contact since. That was 4 years ago. I STILL stalk him on Facebook. I want to see what he's doing and who with. He had a gf for a flash, then that was over for whatever reason.

 

I want to be free of it, I've had many experiences since. But I still look because he's the one who got away and rejected me. I don't try to contact him, I don't message him, I don't show up places where he is. I said "It's okay to look, don't try to touch. You're better than that." But I still look because ... Because.

 

How do I break myself of this bad habit?

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I have one person that I stalk on fb. In April it'll be two years since Ive seen him and its probably nearly a year since we've talked. I didn't feel rejected by him. He's a marine and he got orders to go to Hawaii. BUT I found him on facebook after he said something kinda fishy and I wanted to get to the bottom of it. So, maybe two or three days after he asked me to come stay a few days with him there I stayed up all night googling till I found his wall and the most recent post, which was that same week, was a pic of the ring he bought his wife for their 16th anniversary and a post about how she's so important to him and another 50 years, yada, yada. I haven't confronted him or talked to him since. I hate him but I stalk him anyway. And I'm increasingly worried because he will be back in town in 14 mos and I'm afraid he'll try to contact me and it's so hard for me to imagine saying no to him.

 

Anyway, no advice, just commiseration.

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Block him.

 

Can't stalk what doesn't exist.

 

This. Usually it's someone that we don't have and wish we could have, which is unhealthy anyway. Forget about them. Move onto greener pastures.

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I've never stalked anyone online so it's best not to assume everyone does it.

 

Just block him.

This has been going on for years! What benefit do you get from it? Happiness?

I would also think that if you're thinking about him so much that you wouldn't have enough brain space to think about someone new you might meet.

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I am a recovered Facebook stalker.

 

 

I totally quit Facebook 1-1/2 years ago; i.e., deleted my account. I was spending too much time on Facebook checking out other people's pages. I was addicted!

 

 

Some people's lives are so interesting and crazy! Why do they post the things they do? I was looking at people I didn't even know personally, just knew "of" them. The main person I stalked was my then boyfriend's ex. She made such interesting choices in her life and posted all of them. She would go from one extreme to another. I still find her behavior entertaining.

Edited by primer
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Michelle ma Belle

Although I will admit to briefly checking out some profiles of people I was either interested in or people I'm no longer involved in, I can't ever say that I stalked anyone.

 

Perhaps if you asked me this 15 years ago my story might be slightly different but at this stage in my life I just don't have the emotional and mental energy to subject myself to that kind of torture nor waste my time on people that in the grand scheme of things, don't matter at all.

 

Given that you've been following this one particular guy for 4 years says a lot and seems to require drastic measures in order to save yourself. Blocking him is the absolute least you should do. Deactivating your account is an even better idea particularly if you can't trust yourself.

 

Good luck.

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Once again l just thank the God's l'm not on FB. That thing has gotta be the creepiest most mind fk damn thing ever invented.

 

l was on it for a little while , just to keep track of my daughter, she was having some trouble on it so we had to keep our eye on things.

 

But l had no idea how easily just anyone, could go from this to this to this even just through someones friends and end up in just about anyone's life, literally watching them.

Creeeeeepy.

 

l closed the account, once things were ok with my daughter, to save myself from myself . About the most anti social media person around yet even l found myself doing that crap for awhile.

l'm still haunted by it with the odd thing getting back to me about my ex w or something and l'm not even on it.

Edited by Chilli
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I call it snooping. I feel like 'stalking' would imply I am going to events because I saw they were attending after snooping their Facebook...

 

 

Anyhow. A lot of people do it. A lot won't admit it.

 

Block him.

Can't stalk what doesn't exist.

 

This.

I recently blocked my ex and his two recent exes who were involved in our breakup because drama happened and I wanted to pretend they don't exist for a little while (we are all in the same sports league so when I return to practice I will see all at least once a week. :sick:)

 

What's the point of ''stalking'' online a mere crush from four years ago?

curiosity.

boredom.

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whichwayisup
I can admit this, I'm sure everyone else has done this at some point or another. You stalk people on Facebook all the time. We have our reasons for doing it, mostly for the same reasons we stalk others if the internet, social networking, etc. did not exist. Because you want to see what they're doing and who they're doing it with.

 

I've written about this situation before - I had a thing for a coworker a few years ago. After I was no longer working at the place, I texted him "Want to hang out?" after I had put a present in his box at work annoymously and gotten his number. He texted back "I am not interested in you romantically". I straitened my cuffs and lapels, went Daniel Craig as James Bond cold, and said "Well love makes you fat doesn't it?" I erased his number, no contact since. That was 4 years ago. I STILL stalk him on Facebook. I want to see what he's doing and who with. He had a gf for a flash, then that was over for whatever reason.

 

I want to be free of it, I've had many experiences since. But I still look because he's the one who got away and rejected me. I don't try to contact him, I don't message him, I don't show up places where he is. I said "It's okay to look, don't try to touch. You're better than that." But I still look because ... Because.

 

How do I break myself of this bad habit?

 

Block him. Go off online for a period of time and do not log into your account at all! Once you stop for a week or so the habit will be gone and he won't be on your mind so much.

 

Habits can be broken but you have to want it to end completely (the stalking online)....

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  • 3 months later...
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mortensorchid

I blocked him and that's helped the situation. I wonder still what he's doing but since I can't search for him I don't attempt to look. He pops up on friends' pages every once in a while but otherwise I've noticed a change within me.

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