Nikki Sahagin Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 Okay so I know that this is SO trivial but it's really bothering me right now. I'm hoping someone can help me just gain some perspective. As an earlier post outlines, I have a helluva lot of inner issues so I'm aware this is an irrational over reaction. I just really want a calm voice to talk sense into me and I don't have that in the real world at the moment. My bf went into town to work tonight. He's a contractor. Several of his friends came round (I didn't know at the time but it was to go into town to see him whilst he's working). They knocked for me but because I felt shy/self-conscious I didn't go. Now I feel so silly, guilty and upset because I could have been there too but because of my silly self-consciousness I didn't. I know it's such a small thing but its really bothering me. I feel like my issues made me miss out on something that would have made me happy. It makes me feel pathetic and like something is wrong with me. I just really want some reassuring words. I know its not the end of the world, in the grand scheme of life, one missed night means nothing...but at the moment, I just feel so bad Link to post Share on other sites
StalwartMind Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 I think when it comes to feeling shy, afraid or similar thoughts it's pretty common to put oneself in a situation where you end up making choices that are against your own will. This may sound funny in a way, considering we are supposed to be in control of our own actions. The matter of fact is sometimes things aren't always so simple. In this situation you more than likely was "forced" out of your comfort zone, even if things would of been perfectly alright, had you gone with his friends. The last thing you need to be thinking or doing is blaming yourself as it likely just further enhance your insecurities and self doubt. This may not of been possible, but if you could of gone to town yourself, and met with your boyfriend first at some location (wherever you would of been), it could of eased your way into the night. Either way figuring out some kind of agreement, that would bring you more comfort is highly ideal when confronting fears or situations that bring out the shyness. Like you said it's not the end of the world and there will be many more opportunities like this I'm sure. It's really easy to get caught up in past or future, so much in fact that we often forget to enjoy the present or take advantage of the possibilities that are right in front of us. Try think about ways that would of made you feel much more comfortable, and perhaps next time you can do or arrange exactly that. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 Do something nice for yourself tonight, pamper yourself and take your mind off of it. It bugs me a lot whenever I make a wrong decision too (even something tiny like ordering the wrong thing at a restaurant that we can't afford to eat at very often! ), but it gets better quickly if you try not to obsess over it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nikki Sahagin Posted December 4, 2014 Author Share Posted December 4, 2014 Thank you guys. Just the kind words that I needed to hear tonight. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts