I invite you all along on a journey...lets take a stroll

[kaylan]

This topic will relate to dating as well as a couple of other things. But anyways, this thread is the latest in the Kaylan Series of Positive Thread-age™(lolz trademark)

 

Anyways, this is my getting back on the saddle thread. I have four specific goals that require a four-pronged attack plan. These goals are:

 

1. Writing some good songs and playing shows with a new band by June.

2. Getting in peak physical condition by beach season.

3. Figuring out what I want to do professionally, that way I can find a better job and actually begin an enjoyable career.

4. Actively start dating again. I think Im actually finally bored with singledom.

 

Now, I made this thread to chronicle my journey and to invite others to begin a similar one. I guess I aim to make this a journal and motivational thread. I really want to take control of my life right now. I feel like Im in my first full year of true adulthood (im 25) and I wanna get everything done that Ive always wanted to. Ive always believed that you can make things happen for yourself with hard work and Im prepared for that. I just did some reflection over the last couple of weeks and realized how lackadaisical Ive been. Ive been in this weird malaise, and now I want to break free.

 

Allow me to briefly touch on each of my four goals. And to reach my goals, I plan to make up a daily action plan that sets aside blocks of time to focus on each goal.

 

Im going to really sit and focus on writing songs from now on. Normally Ive been very lazy about my music. I usually only sit down and write lyrics or melodies for 15 minutes at a time and then get distracted doing something else. Or I write something and decide I hate it, and delete it, and sometimes later regret it. From now on I want to have more structured sessions where I can sit for an hour or two and just write. And I also want to practice my bass more. Ive been slipping on my basslines. Im very rusty.

 

Next, Ive really dropped the ball with my fitness over the last month and a half. I had my first work out in that time two days ago. I havent gained weight, but I noticed my body composition was starting to change. Im less tight in a few places and dont like that. Im still slim and weigh the same weight Ive been for the last few years, but if I dont get back on the ball, Ill end up being skinny-fat. So I want to get in good condition for the summer. Not just for the beach, but for my health and so I can be in peak condition for a soccer league I plan to join.

 

In regards to my potential career. Im still pretty lost. I still have no idea what my passion is professionally, outside of music and sports. But I dont wanna end up doing a job for years just to make a living...I want to love what I do. So Im going to network like hell, learn as much as I can about the world, and just try to research different things during the rest of the year so by the time Im 26 I have a better handle on this. Ive looked into getting positions with various sports leagues and music companies, but its impossible to get hired without knowing people in the business. So I have to either network like hell and luck out, or figure out a different profession Id have fun in. And while Id love to play music professionally, Im realistic and know making the big time is a long shot.

 

Lastly, my dating life. For those who remember, Ive been on a dating hiatus. Apart from going out and partying with my friends, I havent actively sought out women. Ive been trying to sort out different aspects of my life, so I havent had the urge to focus on women. I was rather content just drinking with my bros and dancing and kissing a strange girl or two. I deleted my online dating profiles a little while ago, and just havent worried about women too much.

 

Well now, Im ready to get back on the horse. Once I have a good few of weeks going after goals 1 to 3, then Ill put a profile back up online. Ill actually start asking girls out again when Im meet them in various places. Im actually very excited, because I can see something good coming. I know myself, and when I get in this mood where Im proactive, good things happen.

 

I dont know what exactly it is, but Im feeling super optimistic about dating again. Well, actually I do know what part of it is. Right now, Im not scared or bothered by dating. Not long ago I felt dating was too much of a bother, and I didnt want to make myself vulnerable either. But right now, I know exactly what I want and how to get it.

 

I figure Ill end up dating for fun and just enjoying the company of women without expectations. Whatever happens, happens. Casual fun? Ill be careful, slow and cautious, but itll be kool. A possible relationship? Ill take my time to get there, but thats kool with me as well.

 

Anyways, I plan to provide updates and picture of my progress in each area as time rolls along. A big part in sharing this with everyone is to motivate myself as well as others. Id of course love people to start going after goals of their own and sharing it in this thread. Lifes too short not to grab the bull by the horns and pwn the hell out of it.

 

Feel me?

[simpsonic]

Great post. My relationship ended a few weeks ago and I've been spending time focusing on myself. Currently I'm concentrating on grad school (will finish my second semester next month), volunteering, and hanging out with girlfriends. I may be taking a trip to DC in the near future and this summer I'll be studying abroad in Denmark.

 

One of my goals is to read more books and watch all the movies my bf didn't want to watch. lol.

 

Maybe after I return from Denmark later this summer I'll start dating again. But for now, I'm enjoying this time on my own.

 

Sounds like you have some solid goals. Good luck.

[ThaWholigan]

This topic will relate to dating as well as a couple of other things. But anyways, this thread is the latest in the Kaylan Series of Positive Thread-age™(lolz trademark)

 

Anyways, this is my getting back on the saddle thread. I have four specific goals that require a four-pronged attack plan. These goals are:

 

1. Writing some good songs and playing shows with a new band by June.

2. Getting in peak physical condition by beach season.

3. Figuring out what I want to do professionally, that way I can find a better job and actually begin an enjoyable career.

4. Actively start dating again. I think Im actually finally bored with singledom.

 

Now, I made this thread to chronicle my journey and to invite others to begin a similar one. I guess I aim to make this a journal and motivational thread. I really want to take control of my life right now. I feel like Im in my first full year of true adulthood (im 25) and I wanna get everything done that Ive always wanted to. Ive always believed that you can make things happen for yourself with hard work and Im prepared for that. I just did some reflection over the last couple of weeks and realized how lackadaisical Ive been. Ive been in this weird malaise, and now I want to break free.

 

Allow me to briefly touch on each of my four goals. And to reach my goals, I plan to make up a daily action plan that sets aside blocks of time to focus on each goal.

 

Im going to really sit and focus on writing songs from now on. Normally Ive been very lazy about my music. I usually only sit down and write lyrics or melodies for 15 minutes at a time and then get distracted doing something else. Or I write something and decide I hate it, and delete it, and sometimes later regret it. From now on I want to have more structured sessions where I can sit for an hour or two and just write. And I also want to practice my bass more. Ive been slipping on my basslines. Im very rusty.

 

Next, Ive really dropped the ball with my fitness over the last month and a half. I had my first work out in that time two days ago. I havent gained weight, but I noticed my body composition was starting to change. Im less tight in a few places and dont like that. Im still slim and weigh the same weight Ive been for the last few years, but if I dont get back on the ball, Ill end up being skinny-fat. So I want to get in good condition for the summer. Not just for the beach, but for my health and so I can be in peak condition for a soccer league I plan to join.

 

In regards to my potential career. Im still pretty lost. I still have no idea what my passion is professionally, outside of music and sports. But I dont wanna end up doing a job for years just to make a living...I want to love what I do. So Im going to network like hell, learn as much as I can about the world, and just try to research different things during the rest of the year so by the time Im 26 I have a better handle on this. Ive looked into getting positions with various sports leagues and music companies, but its impossible to get hired without knowing people in the business. So I have to either network like hell and luck out, or figure out a different profession Id have fun in. And while Id love to play music professionally, Im realistic and know making the big time is a long shot.

 

Lastly, my dating life. For those who remember, Ive been on a dating hiatus. Apart from going out and partying with my friends, I havent actively sought out women. Ive been trying to sort out different aspects of my life, so I havent had the urge to focus on women. I was rather content just drinking with my bros and dancing and kissing a strange girl or two. I deleted my online dating profiles a little while ago, and just havent worried about women too much.

 

Well now, Im ready to get back on the horse. Once I have a good few of weeks going after goals 1 to 3, then Ill put a profile back up online. Ill actually start asking girls out again when Im meet them in various places. Im actually very excited, because I can see something good coming. I know myself, and when I get in this mood where Im proactive, good things happen.

 

I dont know what exactly it is, but Im feeling super optimistic about dating again. Well, actually I do know what part of it is. Right now, Im not scared or bothered by dating. Not long ago I felt dating was too much of a bother, and I didnt want to make myself vulnerable either. But right now, I know exactly what I want and how to get it.

 

I figure Ill end up dating for fun and just enjoying the company of women without expectations. Whatever happens, happens. Casual fun? Ill be careful, slow and cautious, but itll be kool. A possible relationship? Ill take my time to get there, but thats kool with me as well.

 

Anyways, I plan to provide updates and picture of my progress in each area as time rolls along. A big part in sharing this with everyone is to motivate myself as well as others. Id of course love people to start going after goals of their own and sharing it in this thread. Lifes too short not to grab the bull by the horns and pwn the hell out of it.

 

Feel me?

 

Sounds almost exactly like my 4 goals .

 

I am not the most prolific songwriter so I'm making a pledge to write more poems and songs. I'm already working with a band as a pianist/multi instrumentalist/producer (Tha Wholiganz ), and I also have a solo career as a rapper that has been in the offing for a long while. It's been pretty good, I did a song with Outlawz and recently Canibus & Bizzy Bone. Now just need some solid material to sort out. Although I have to say that my close and dear friend I've been working with, I'm having a few slight creative differences with at the moment, I'm more of a purist when it comes to music but he is very perfectionist so it takes AGES to get songs done. It does my face in . Even worse when mixing. Love him though, he's like a brother.

 

I'm also aiming to improve my singing voice. Everybody says I can sing, when I don't think I am that good really, I just have good pitch (autism) and a decent vibrato. Nothing special yet. I'll get there though hopefully.

 

I'm hoping to get into businesses and entrepreneurship very soon, I think it's beneficial for a number of reasons, I just have to adjust my head round all the different facets of business. I think it's important for other black people to do the same as we don't do enough of that and it could be to our detriment in the future, so I want to get into encouraging others to do it, first black then everyone.

 

Then there is fitness. My dad is a bit of a health nut, and he reckons I could have a magnificent build because of my height and weight so he's been pushing me for a while. I need to organize a regime to put in place so I can do it, diet and workout. He also said I should do a martial art but I still don't know which one to do yet. I'm gonna figure that one out soon as I get the money to be able to do it. Money is very important at the moment because there is so little of it currently.

 

Finally, dating. Well, considering I'm vastly inexperienced in this area, I think the best thing for me to do would be to take it easy and just have fun for now. I think once I can do that, then I can start dating properly. Living at home really limits my options, with regards to a number of things. But I'm confident that I can get past all of that and start dating successfully this year.

 

[veggirl]

Very cool. I enjoy your positive attitude!

[ThaWholigan]

It's funny how the positive threads are always the ones that peter out

[MrNate 2.0]

This happens to mine every time.

 

 

 

 

It's the Buzz Killington of LS.

[Els]

Sounds good. Remember to have fun along the way!

[ariadne999]

you should stick to FWB arrangements.

Edited March 30, 2012 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Unecessary

[brokenTom]

Internships are a good way to get an idea how you'd like different kinds of work, and helps a ton with networking. People love free labour. Of course doing this doesn't always leave a lot of time for the others thing you may want to do, especially if you need another job to keep you going financially.

 

Best of Luck, and keep that positive attitude no matter what.

[dasein]

You and wholigan are -way- ahead of where I was at your age.

[kaylan]

Simple a bump to avoid closing. Will update soon.

[bolase]

Lovely thread.

 

I have a few goals for the next 6 months (til year's end):

 

- Feel my way into my new job and workplace until I feel comfortable bringing anything work related up with anyone in our team and shrug off feelings of intimidation based on my own fears, from the top level. I want to grow into a place where I feel competent and I'm working at my creative potential with flow between everyone's ideas and the outputs.

 

2. Swim every single week, either in the sea or the pool, just for the shock and the refresh for my mind,

 

3. Say thank you to everyone who does something nice for me or to whom I am grateful (even if I'm not saying it in words, or directly to their face).

 

4. Find peace with my dating life and work out whether or not I need a long break from relationships, and even thoughts about them, to sort out my new life.

[kaylan]

Bump to prevent closing. Will update in the next couple of weeks with whats going on in my life and the progress Ive made.

[madjac74]

You have some good goals and you figured them out at a young age. I had to re-focus my life and goals when I got divorced at 34. I'm 38 now and still working on them so I wish you luck and will give you as much advise as I can if you want. I am focused on writing as well but not in the musical sense. I also have kids in the mix so I really am just looking to be the best dad I can be.

[simpsonic]

Bump to prevent closing. Will update in the next couple of weeks with whats going on in my life and the progress Ive made.

 

Looking forward to hearing about your progress.

 

Meanwhile, I've been doing pretty well. A month and a half ago I returned home from studying abroad in Denmark. I had a MARVELOUS time...I got to know my classmates on a deeper level, learned a lot, not to mention Denmark is a beautiful country. I celebrated my birthday there as well! My roomies and a few other classmates took me to a karaoke bar and we sang our hearts out. Best birthday ever.

 

I have also met a ton of new people. Joined a few meetup groups and I already have a new set of friends I hang out with on a regular basis. Have talked to some guys as well. Nothing serious has come out of these interactions, but it is fun hanging out and flirting with them.

 

I have taken up running. Currently in the middle of training for a 5k via the Couch to 5k program. Got a long way to go, but I'll eventually get there!

 

Thinking about joining Match.com. Kinda nervous about it though as I haven't online dated in almost a year.

[kaylan]

Ok, its been a little over 6 months, and Im definitely updating this week. I have made good progress regarding work, the gym, and my dating outlook. So there is news to share. Im just bumping now to prevent the thread from closing.

[freestyle]

How's the music coming along?