Staying home or depressed

[me003]

I have always been shy, but will talk to people. this has always been who I am. Lately I have been staying home and like it and only going out when I have to, gym, or to see friends. I have also never been one to entertain people at my place. My parents always did.

 

I never thought anything of it. I have been having migranes and body aches. My friend last time told me that maybe I was depressed. I know when I am depressed and that is not how I feel. However, ever since she told me this, I am wondering if I am. I actually started feeling liek I am trapped at home. Just those few words have now made my home feel like a prison.

 

I just don't get it. Why is it that she changed this for me. She was being helpful, but now i feel like she ruined it.

 

I have always been the kind of person who helps out anyone in need. I am the one people can count on. Friday I had made plans with a friend, then she said that her husband had plans for Saturday and she said Sunday we would do something. Today, she tells me that because of the weather we could not meet. That it was too bad the movie she decided to go to I had already seen. So we should get together in 2 weeks. Now I feel like an idiot, I stayed home waiting for her phone call Saturday and Sunday. Now I feel like this was another reason why now I am depressed in my house. I have gone way beyond for her at bailed her out and I can't believe that she dismissed it. I am so angry. I had to cry because I felt like an idiot stopping my life.

 

I just need to know what you guys think or see as the problem, or even if you see a problem.

[Ronni_W]

I think since it is bothering you, it is a problem for you. Whether or not anybody else can see it, doesn't really matter. Your thoughts and feelings are valid just because you have them. (Not necessarily based on accurate data, but valid nonetheless.)

 

Whether or not you're suffering from depression, mild or severe, can't be determined here.

How do you feel about scheduling an appointment with a professional who can help you get clear about what all is, or may be, going on for you?

 

Your friend didn't, in reality, ruin anything. It is what you are thinking about what your friend said that has brought these new perceptions and feelings of you being imprisoned in your own home. It's your thoughts, not your friend's observation/opinion/words.

 

Your communications with your other friend that you had plans with this weekend. Maybe it is that you depended on her too much. Maybe it is that you don't feel capable or comfortable expressing your upset, disappointment, frustration. Maybe it is that she just can't be relied upon now that she also has to take her husband's preferences and schedule into account. Maybe it's some combination of those things.

 

A therapist will also be able to help you sort out all of that.

[me003]

The problem here is that when ever she needs me to pick up her kids I do it. My problem is that I stayed home all day Sunday waiting for he phoen call thinking that the movie was sold out. I have realized that I have done more for her than she has for me. Like watching her kids from F-Sunday because she wanted to go on a vacation with her hubby. Another time before hubby came along she had a wedding in Vegas and I took care of her kids that weekend too.

I just think its plain rude to tell a person that you will do something with them. Know that they are waiting for your phone call and youhaveto call then in order for them to tell you that you can't meet. Good thing I had a snack.

 

On the other thing. I just got so angry and I felt depressed because of it. That is something I need to work at. I should not allow others to change my happy mood.