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Domination in bed?


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ElvenPriestess

I mean, really, I was just curious. Men, do you like it when a girl dominates you in bed? I like it, but I haven't always been with guys that like me to do it. Is it like a superiority thing? I love taking control, putting a guy on his back, doing what I want to do. But then, I love pleasing the guy, it really does it for me.

 

Guys, what's your take?

 

Ladies, any experience stories?

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Some guys may like that, some guys may hate that.

 

In bed I always go by the guy.

 

I really don't care one way or the other,

 

Ariadne

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I mean, really, I was just curious. Men, do you like it when a girl dominates you in bed? I like it, but I haven't always been with guys that like me to do it. Is it like a superiority thing? I love taking control, putting a guy on his back, doing what I want to do. But then, I love pleasing the guy, it really does it for me.

 

Guys, what's your take?

 

Ladies, any experience stories?

I can't say I like her to be "dominant" per-say (I'm thinking, dominant/submissive type thing...safe words and all) but I don't really have a problem with a girl taking the lead if she so desires (throwing me on the bed, jumping on top of me kind of thing).

taking control, putting a guy on his back, doing what I want to do

Works for me:)

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ElvenPriestess
I can't say I like her to be "dominant" per-say (I'm thinking, dominant/submissive type thing...safe words and all) but I don't really have a problem with a girl taking the lead if she so desires (throwing me on the bed, jumping on top of me kind of thing).

 

Works for me:)

 

Well good to know that some do like that. I guess it's all a preference and compatibility. And I always assumed that men hate having to do all the work. I like the work becasue I enjoy the outcome. :-)

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I wish my W would take control more often. They say you do things to your partner that you enjoy so it would help give a person an idea of what they really like as well.

 

Just set back & enjoy once in a while would be a good thing. ;)

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ElvenPriestess
I wish my W would take control more often. They say you do things to your partner that you enjoy so it would help give a person an idea of what they really like as well.

 

Just set back & enjoy once in a while would be a good thing. ;)

 

That's a good point, I should let down my aggressive take over tendencies sometimes. Balance myself. :-) And all these things I read and post will help me for the day I get to have sex again. lol.

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Normally I'm pretty submissive in the bedroom but occassionally I'll take the lead and jump my SO's bones. I woke up at 3am last night with an incredible urge to have sex and I got my SO all hot and bothered, but ultimately he's usually in the dominant sexual position - on top or behind me. I really don't like being on top, I don't climax very well for some reason. Might be my anatomy.

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ElvenPriestess

Wow you can actually get him up in the middle of the night for it?? You are SO lucky, I get those late night urges often! I see I'm not the only one. ;-)

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Summer_guy_uk

Generally me and my SO would have a 90/10 % Dominant/Submissive role during our sex sessions.

During love making sessions I was always dominant but caring and gentle etc.

 

But it worked out:

90% of the time: Me being dominant.

10% of the time: Her being dominant.

 

I'm dominant by nature but I find that it keeps things exciting by mixing it up every now and then.

Our sex life remained constant and we would have sex roughly 14-18 times a week depending on work schedules.

 

So let's average that at 16 times a week, so (16*.10=1.6) So about x2 a week she would play a dominant role which is about right.

 

At least once during the week if I have been out with friends, I'd come home and she'd be all leathered up and demand me into bed.

And then generally after I get back from the gym on saturday she'll jump me aggressivly and I love it!

 

I think in small portions, female dominance is very sexy and helps keeps a couples sex life varied and interesting! :love:

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Wow you can actually get him up in the middle of the night for it?? You are SO lucky, I get those late night urges often! I see I'm not the only one. ;-)

 

Well it probably helped that he fell asleep at like 9:30pm last night.

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Mustang Sally

I like to be in charge on occasion, in the sack.

And usually, like blind otter, this seems to come over me in the middle of the night. I've never been turned down yet...but admittedly, my H is a horny bastard.

 

On the other hand, I'm going through a phase where I want him to take some serious control. Like, he wants me so bad, it's a little bit forceful. Know what I mean? That absolutely makes me wetter than wet...

 

Now I'm not talking S&M or BDSM, or rape-scenes or anything. Just a bit of an urgent hammering. Forget the candles and rose petals and sh*t. I want the hot stuff.

 

Unfortunately, H is not very good at that...

:(

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ElvenPriestess

Wow, when I DID have sex he was the opposite to that. NEVER romantic or passionate, always aggressive, and he HATED to be dominated. It had to be a wild ride, his way. Well now there's no sex for me so as I've said, I like to at least talk about it. It kind of alleviates the frustration you know what I mean?

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Well still, I love the fact that you can do that without fearing the "I'm tired go away stuff." lol

 

Oh no, not my SO. I have to sleep with clothes on or else he has a hard on the entire night and it can get painful for him. Even with clothes on he still periodically gets hard throughout the night so all I have to do is wait for the right time and he'll say yes to anything as long as he can get some.

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Mustang Sally
Wow, when I DID have sex he was the opposite to that. NEVER romantic or passionate, always aggressive, and he HATED to be dominated. It had to be a wild ride, his way.

Ha!

Well, isn't that just always the way?

 

We want what we don't have....

:confused:

Well now there's no sex for me so as I've said, I like to at least talk about it. It kind of alleviates the frustration you know what I mean?

Sorry to hear that, EP.

Yes, I do understand.

Talk away, if it helps.

I have plenty of (worthless?) opinions to offer, as do many others....

:)

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ElvenPriestess

I SO wish I had that! I mean, sometimes I have these intense dreams and i wake up and want to act them out but can't! Sigh. You are quite fortunate. This may sound bad, but I like horny guys much more than anti-sex ones. Haha. MS, it's not worthless to me, it helps me out believe it or not. I guess I'm like the guy who never gets any but I'm the girl in this case. lol.

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Mustang Sally
I SO wish I had that!

What?

A horny f*ck of a husband?

 

Yeah, well, it does have it's advantages at times.

 

But, if you know anything about me, you will find that he and I are not on such good terms.

 

I mean, sometimes I have these intense dreams and i wake up and want to act them out but can't! Sigh. You are quite fortunate. This may sound bad, but I like horny guys much more than anti-sex ones.

Well, I don't think I would like an anti-sex man, either. In fact, that would absolutely NOT be working for me. That would take me to divorce court.

 

What's the deal?

Can you give me a quick recap?

Your SO is not sexual? Has ED? What's going on that he doesn't want to bone you constantly?

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ElvenPriestess
What?

A horny f*ck of a husband?

 

Yeah, well, it does have it's advantages at times.

 

But, if you know anything about me, you will find that he and I are not on such good terms.

 

 

Well, I don't think I would like an anti-sex man, either. In fact, that would absolutely NOT be working for me. That would take me to divorce court.

 

What's the deal?

Can you give me a quick recap?

Your SO is not sexual? Has ED? What's going on that he doesn't want to bone you constantly?

 

Some of it's on my "Marriage nearing it's end" thread, but basically he hasn't had sex with me in about three months, never any impulses, nothing. And he won't let me talk about sex either. We too are on bad terms though, and he's talked about divorce sometimes, but I STILL am surprised he doesn't want sex. But that's the way it is. My male friends who know me good are like "You're joking right?"

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ElvenPriestess
I dominate my H most of the time. how I wished he dominate Me as often as well.:D

 

I could go for some of both right now. ;-)

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HabitualDelirium

We like to switch around a bit. Sometimes I'm dominate and he loves it. Sometimes he's dominate and I love it. Sometimes, it's even mutual. We love it both ways, and love diversity.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Oh no, not my SO. I have to sleep with clothes on or else he has a hard on the entire night and it can get painful for him. Even with clothes on he still periodically gets hard throughout the night so all I have to do is wait for the right time and he'll say yes to anything as long as he can get some.

 

I'm the same way, but I hate it when a SO wears anything to bed. I'll happily lose sleep every time. My only problem with late night surprise sex is that I'm unfortunately a deep sleeper, and it takes a bit to get me to wake up. there's no "fondle until I get into it", I actually need to be woken up. For me, if there's a girl next to me, I'm waking up horny, guaranteed, but I suffer from the fear of rejection thing as well.

 

As far as the sub/dom thing goes, I tend to be more dominant, but like it the other way around sometimes. My ex always wanted to be dominant, so sex ended up being more of a wrestling match than fun, thus the EX status. The previous girl was always submissive, which worked well, except the few things she would have liked to have tried she didn't get across, so i didn't find out till later the fun I had missed out on, and I myself had been to inexperienced to try anything new at that point, for fear I might insult her or make her feel cheap or something. we live, we learn.

 

EP, the thing about guys getting tired of doing all the work, I look at it more as, i really enjoy getting the girl off, and what I can do to improve her time. Unless she isn't very vocal or fun, I usually don't notice until sweating and out of breath.

as far as girls on top, it generally doesn't provide a lot of stimulation for me, so it's hard for me to maintain an interest, and therefor maintain "functioning equipment", but I think that also depends a lot on having the right girl to keep my attention.

Edited by Vampirlequin
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ElvenPriestess

 

EP, the thing about guys getting tired of doing all the work, I look at it more as, i really enjoy getting the girl off, and what I can do to improve her time. Unless she isn't very vocal or fun, I usually don't notice until sweating and out of breath.

as far as girls on top, it generally doesn't provide a lot of stimulation for me, so it's hard for me to maintain an interest, and therefor maintain "functioning equipment", but I think that also depends a lot on having the right girl to keep my attention.

 

Indeed, the woman has to know what she's doing is she takes control. Alot of times when a girl tries to dominate she's at a loss, doesn't understand the manipulation of body and form to get the desired senses flowing.

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