Jump to content

Is my boyfriend an alcoholic?


Recommended Posts

Hi All,

I'm worried that my boyfriend might be an alcoholic. Could someone please shed some light on this situation and what I should do.

 

I have been dating this guy for almost 4 months now. We are in a long-distance relationship and see each other every other weekend. So, the behavior I will be describing is only happening on the weekends. I can't say if the same happens on the weekdays/nights as well.

 

Anyways, I knew from day one that he liked wine. He would drink throughout the night, would take a glass to bed, and even would sip on the leftover wine as soon as he would wake up the next morning. I thought it was strange, but never really had an idea how much he is really drinking until last weekend. I took him to the airport at the end of the long 4 day weekend, came home and it hit me that he drank 6 bottles of wine and about half a bottle of scotch in 4 days all by himself.

 

He seem to never get drunk despite drinking so much. He has a full-time job and works about 60 hours a week. He is a great guy and treats me really well. And I do love him. But I'm really worried about his health and potential problems down the road, as we are talking about a long term relationship.

 

Also, I worry that him being under the influence pretty much the whole time to some degree while we are together, I don't really get to see his "real, sober" personality.

 

I want to talk to him, but not sure how to bring it up without hurting his feelings. Also, should i talk to him on the phone, or wait till he is in town next time? He's been saying that the last few days i seem distant and asked me if everything was ok, and I'm hesitant to bring up the subject,

 

Do you guys agree that he is drinking way too much? Do you think he is an alcoholic?

 

Thank you so much in advance.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

It's looking that way.

 

I'm glad you're seeing it now. When you do speak with him, he's probably going to deny it or take it down a few notches, like, yah I don't usually drink that much, it was just because if xyz. Educate yourself on relationships with problem drinkers. It's exhausting. You will be the one that gets burnt.

 

Take care.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes. It took me a while to figure out that my ex-bf was an alcoholic too. He did not disclose that to me when we met, nor did he put it in his online dating profile (where we met. there is a question about that). At first I thought we were just having a good time together, we would see each other on weekends and have fun, often having a drink together. Then I realized that he was drinking in the mornings and all day long.... it was more than just having a good time. He needed it and it was an addiction. He ended up going to rehab TWICE during our short 6 month relationship. In hindsight, the drinking and the residual effects of it and the drama is the main thing that ruined our relationship and caused it to end. Very sad.

 

So, yes, it is possible that they don't admit it to you, because they don't think it's a problem to admit to in the first place.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
Do you think he is an alcoholic?

 

being an ex-alcoholic myself i can tell you that he's an alcoholic...

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

He's an alcoholic.

 

He's never 'drunk' because the constant drinking made his tolerance insanely high. That's usually what happens.

 

Let him go unless you want a rocky life where you'll never be a priority (his first love is his alcohol... and will always be).

 

Hi All,

I'm worried that my boyfriend might be an alcoholic. Could someone please shed some light on this situation and what I should do.

 

I have been dating this guy for almost 4 months now. We are in a long-distance relationship and see each other every other weekend. So, the behavior I will be describing is only happening on the weekends. I can't say if the same happens on the weekdays/nights as well.

 

Anyways, I knew from day one that he liked wine. He would drink throughout the night, would take a glass to bed, and even would sip on the leftover wine as soon as he would wake up the next morning. I thought it was strange, but never really had an idea how much he is really drinking until last weekend. I took him to the airport at the end of the long 4 day weekend, came home and it hit me that he drank 6 bottles of wine and about half a bottle of scotch in 4 days all by himself.

 

He seem to never get drunk despite drinking so much. He has a full-time job and works about 60 hours a week. He is a great guy and treats me really well. And I do love him. But I'm really worried about his health and potential problems down the road, as we are talking about a long term relationship.

 

Also, I worry that him being under the influence pretty much the whole time to some degree while we are together, I don't really get to see his "real, sober" personality.

 

I want to talk to him, but not sure how to bring it up without hurting his feelings. Also, should i talk to him on the phone, or wait till he is in town next time? He's been saying that the last few days i seem distant and asked me if everything was ok, and I'm hesitant to bring up the subject,

 

Do you guys agree that he is drinking way too much? Do you think he is an alcoholic?

 

Thank you so much in advance.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 3 weeks later...

Anyone who would drink leftover wine first thing in the morning has got a serious drinking problem..blech!

 

There is nothing you are going to be able to do about it either. He isn't going to admit it to you and he isn't going to change it for you either. Your best bet is to throw this one back in the water and look elsewhere for a possible partner.

Link to post
Share on other sites

It seems the thread starter hasn't come back to respond to replies, thread closed till they come back. if they would like to have the thread reopened then alert on my post and we will do so.

 

Thanks all who participated.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
×
×
  • Create New...