MiniMimi13 Posted September 3, 2012 Share Posted September 3, 2012 Um, I'm 13 (yes young I know) and I'm very mature for my age and I have a very abusive mother. She's abusive both physically and emotionally. She'll call me names like, "ugly, fat, stupid, worthless, etc." She'll say things like "I hate you!" "I wish you weren't born!". She would hit me sometimes. Not like a flick or hit on the back of the head. Like a punch to my stomach, back, eye, and arm. Kicking me, pulling my hair, slapping me and pushing me. I've been dealing with this since I was in the 5th grade so basically around the age of 10. She'll blame me for things I had nothing to do with. She drinks a lot and she doesn't know how to act when she gets drunk. She took my phone once in a fit of anger and threw it against the wall and to the floor twice. I hate when she gets like this but she's also done this to her own mother(my grandmother) when they were younger. My mom is 45 by the way. I don't think I can take anymore of this. I'm trying to go to boarding school for high school but if I don't get in, I don't know what I'll do. Do you guys have any advice? Link to post Share on other sites
nikkiana Posted September 3, 2012 Share Posted September 3, 2012 First of all, kudos to you for recognizing that this is a bad situation that you need help to deal with. That truly is very mature of you. You absolutely should not have to deal with the way that you're mother's treating you. The first thing I'd recommend that you do is to find an adult that you trust and tell them what you've written here... whether that be a teacher, another relative, your school's guidance counselor, a friend's parent, etc. Anyone who can help you get out of a bad situation on a moment's notice is a good thing. Telling an adult at school is an especially good idea because people who work at school have some training on how to advise you on how to get additional help and figure out what all of your options may be. Also, the more adults in your life that know your situation, generally the better. Also, it may be beneficial to see if there's an Alateen (For Teens) meeting in your area. Since you've listed your location in NJ, here's the list: New Jersey Al-Anon & Alateen Understand that your mom's behavior is in no way your fault, and you shouldn't feel ashamed to reach out for help. I know it can be incredibly difficult and scary, but you deserve so much better than to be in the situation you're in right now. Please remember to put your own safety first, and if she's being violent and combative, do not hesitate to call for help. Link to post Share on other sites
SincereOnlineGuy Posted September 4, 2012 Share Posted September 4, 2012 I'm sure this is going to sound really difficult to convince yourself to do... but school should be starting soon (if not already)... and it would be SO VERY HELPFUL AND WISE of you to make an appointment with a counselor at school, and tell them ALL OF WHAT YOU WROTE here. In fact, maybe print-out your post above, and just hand it to the counselor when you get to the appointment. You need the attention of someone who is right in your area, and who knows of the resources available to you. Just expressing yourself as you have, here, probably feels 'good' in a way. Keep writing here if it helps you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
turnera Posted September 4, 2012 Share Posted September 4, 2012 Yes, your first step HAS to be telling your school counselor. IF he/she doesn't help, then go to see your principal. They will get you the right resources, help you find a boarding school, etc. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
GutterPumpkin Posted September 22, 2012 Share Posted September 22, 2012 Dude -- if your mom hits you, hit her back! Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted September 25, 2012 Share Posted September 25, 2012 I'm really sorry to hear of your situation. The advice to see if you can get an appointment with a counsellor is a good one. It sounds like your mother's drinking is a big problem here in her losing control and behaving badly. She may be an alcoholic. In the UK, there are groups for the families of alcoholics, called Al Anon, where you can go along and talk to people who are suffering similar problems. Please look into what is available local to you. If there is any welfare person at your school - counsellor, school nurse, adviser - or perhaps your family doctor, please consider talking to them about this. Your mother should not be doing this and it's not something you have to put up with. A social services workers could become involved and support you, while encouraging your mother to get help for her drinking and other problems. Have you tried talking to relatives about this? Are they aware how your Mum treats you? Is there any relative who you feel would support you and maybe look after you, if you told them about the situation? You've made a start by telling us. I do hope you can trust someone near to you. Link to post Share on other sites
CopingGal Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 MiniMimi13, I want you to call this number. This is the child abuse hotline for New Jersey 1-877-NJ ABUSE or 1-877-652-2873 The hotline is active 24 hours a day. Keep us posted on what is going on. Link to post Share on other sites
CopingGal Posted October 9, 2012 Share Posted October 9, 2012 MiniMimi, check in with us. How are you doing? Link to post Share on other sites
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