riceboy Posted August 30, 2005 Share Posted August 30, 2005 Need some opinions here. We've been dating for about 3 years and living together for the last two years. Everything has been great except we no longer have sex. We still huge, kiss, and do lots of things together. Most of the time the relationship seems ok but something is wrong. Well she came out and told me that she wants to move out and move on. She doesn't know who she is and wants to find herself and she misses missing me. She says she loves me but the attraction is no longer there. We talked about it for a while and we agreed that living together was not a good idea since we didn't have time for ourselves and whatnot. Plus She says things are too comfortable with me and that she does not want me to be her crutch. Anyhow we agreed to move out and stay together to see if that makes a difference. I am somewhat lost here....is this the right path? Should I just let her go? Is this something that can be resolved? Anyone has similar experiences? Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted August 30, 2005 Share Posted August 30, 2005 Well it sounds like your relationship is not working out since you don't have sex anymore. It's possible that she met someone else. But in any case, you're going backwards and she doesn't want to live with you. Now everything depends on her and all you can do is date her or break up with her. Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted August 30, 2005 Share Posted August 30, 2005 Well it sounds like your relationship is not working out since you don't have sex anymore. It's possible that she met someone else. But in any case, you're going backwards and she doesn't want to live with you. Now everything depends on her and all you can do is date her or break up with her. I agree... at this point you would be going backwards. If you feel okay in dating her then good to go, but from what you've said it seems that your girlfriend is wanting to look around and do other things so that would be the risk you have to consider. Good Luck Link to post Share on other sites
bluechocolate Posted August 30, 2005 Share Posted August 30, 2005 Sorry to say this, but it sounds to me like she's saying all the things she thinks will let you down gently. Interesting that they are all about her - she is no longer attracted to you, she doesn't want to rely so much on you, she doesn't know who she is... The thing is none of those are things that you can change. See what I mean? Anyhow we agreed to move out and stay together to see if that makes a difference. Whose idea was this? One minute she wants to move out & move on 'cause the attraction is not there & the next she's willing to continue going out with you, just not living with you? hmmmm....... I am somewhat lost here....is this the right path? Personally, I don't think so. Link to post Share on other sites
Opium Posted August 30, 2005 Share Posted August 30, 2005 I would see this as a step back in your relationship and stepping back is never a good thing. When you are in a committed relationship it's suppose to move foward to bigger and better things. It's obvious from a woman's point of view that she loves you for who you are and because of the history you have together but not as a man as far as being by her side. I don't think it's going to work out once you guys move out, she's going to have her independence again and feel as if she needs to adventure out into the world. I would reconsider your thoughts of keeping this woman by your side. Hope everything turns out for the best. Link to post Share on other sites
Author riceboy Posted September 1, 2005 Author Share Posted September 1, 2005 Yeah so after few days of alone time and thinking she says she feels different and wants to try after we move out. Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
alainajones Posted September 2, 2005 Share Posted September 2, 2005 My bf broke up with me last year and he moved out. When he came back and I took him back, we still lived in separate apartments for a year. And it's been a year since we broke up once and we now live together again and things are going better than when we lived together the first time. It might be a little different in your case, since she wants to move out but wants to stay together, but I just wanted to say that sometimes, unfortunately, you have to take a few steps back to move forward again. Maybe you can use this time to re-evaluate the relationship and take it from there... Good luck to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author riceboy Posted September 2, 2005 Author Share Posted September 2, 2005 Alianajones, When you guys were apart....what sort of contact did youguys have? Once a week? Phone only? Physical relationship? Thanks. Link to post Share on other sites
alainajones Posted September 2, 2005 Share Posted September 2, 2005 At first, we did talk via e-mail everyday for a few weeks. I was hurt and trying to get him back. We talked a couple of times on the phone, but we didn't see each other in person. Then when I gave up and decided to let him go, I stopped talking to him because I wanted to move on. He came back a week or so after I stopped talking to him. If she wants to go/move out, I'd say "let her go"... At least for now. It'll give both of you a chance to look at the relationship from different views... You two might realize that you really want to be with each other, or, you might realize you are okay without each other... Link to post Share on other sites
Author riceboy Posted September 2, 2005 Author Share Posted September 2, 2005 Alianajones, Do you mean just break it off? She's moving out but she's okay staying together? Should I still let her go? Link to post Share on other sites
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