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Reconnecting with a girl after a few years


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I can’t really use the term Ex as we were never actually boyfriend and girlfriend it was an open relationship.

 

So a few years ago I met this girl and we had a pretty hot relationship with fun times. We got into a stupid argument and I must have become needy cos she said she didn’t want to see me anymore.

 

I took advise from another online forum.

 

They basically said go no contact until you are ready to speak to her again.

 

Due to a series of events in my life I never contacted her despite her sending me multiple messages even one almost a year after no contact.

 

I got involved with another girl which turns out was a bad idea and that’s ended now.

 

I’d like to meet up with this girl again and assuming she’s single I think she would like to as well. What message should I send to her do you think?

 

Thanks for your advice.

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After "a few years". one would assume she's moved on. And even if she's single, having been ghosted by you may not have left her in the best frame of mind.

 

I'd start with something low key, along the lines of " just saying 'hi' "...

 

Mr. lucky

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George Strait, famed country singer, would say "What's going on in your world?

It sure is lonesome in mine" good song.

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somanymistakes

"Hi, I was thinking of you and wondering how you were doing"?

 

Just a general hello will give her an opening to tell you whether she's available and interested or hates your guts and doesn't want to talk to you.

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Just drop her a line to see how she's been doing and see if she responds. That's all you can do. If she responds, great. If not, shake it off the best you can and move on.

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Consider bumping into one of her friends and asking about her. Show enough interest so that you know it will get back to her.

 

If she's interested she will let you know by opening a more direct route. Just keep you eyes and ears open for it.

 

Best Wishes

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I took advise from another online forum.

They basically said go no contact until you are ready to speak to her again.

You were told wrong. It is supposed to be until they contact you. It doesn't mean "ignore",...it means you "don't go first".

 

Due to a series of events in my life I never contacted her despite her sending me multiple messages even one almost a year after no contact.
You haven't contacted her "after a year of no contact", what does that even mean? It is double speak.

 

I’d like to meet up with this girl again and assuming she’s single I think she would like to as well. What message should I send to her do you think?
You screwed her over by ignoring her when she tried to make honest contact with you. You're done,...forget it.

 

The PUA community seems to have made some kind of religion out of this "no contact" and treating it like it is some kind of entity,...a "thing". What reality should be is Smart Contact,...or Common Sense Contact. You don't chase when you get dumped, therefore there is nothing to contact them about so you don't contact them. But if something important happens that qualifies as a valid reason to contact them then you do it. If they reach out to you for something then you be a decent human being and respond to them. It isn't that complicated. The whole original point of "no contact" before it got turned into a religion or a manipulation technique was just to show the other person that you have moved on from them and are not going to pursue them,...that is all it was.

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