dupedforreal123 Posted January 27, 2019 Share Posted January 27, 2019 (edited) Knowing what you know now say 10 years from now and both you and your [affair partner] were available (single) would you move into a relationship with them if you had the chance? Why or Why not? Edited January 27, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Edit acronym and move to GRD and clarify title Link to post Share on other sites
Lotus_Luna Posted January 28, 2019 Share Posted January 28, 2019 Absolutely. To me, he is exactly the man I want to be with. The dynamic of our relationship makes me feel secure, happy and supportive. I’m sure I’ll get some negative responses, but this is the truth. It didnt start this good, we both have grown closer and healthier over time. We’ve ended a few times but each tome we reconnected it was stronger then the last. I dont know if we will end up together. Link to post Share on other sites
Naivewomen Posted February 7, 2019 Share Posted February 7, 2019 @LL are u still with him? Link to post Share on other sites
loversquarrel Posted February 7, 2019 Share Posted February 7, 2019 I would have, she is now my wife. Link to post Share on other sites
Prudence V Posted February 7, 2019 Share Posted February 7, 2019 We did. :love::love::love: Link to post Share on other sites
RecentChange Posted February 7, 2019 Share Posted February 7, 2019 Nope. I knew the things about him, the things that make them an unsuitable long term partner that his wife didn’t know. I also know that our affair was an escape from reality, not something “real”. Link to post Share on other sites
Rayce Posted February 7, 2019 Share Posted February 7, 2019 Since I am not really sure what happened I would give him the benefit of the doubt and say... Yes he is my hearts desire. Link to post Share on other sites
somanymistakes Posted February 7, 2019 Share Posted February 7, 2019 Move 'into' a relationship? Aren't you already in a relationship, if you're APs? Just a kind of mixed-up one. Do you mean get married or something? I'm not sure I ever want to get married. Between my parents' terrible relationship and the legal nightmare we're still trying to sort out with my boyfriend's wife, the idea of marriage is leaving a bad taste in my mouth right now. Link to post Share on other sites
Happy Lemming Posted February 8, 2019 Share Posted February 8, 2019 I've always been single, but I did "date" a married woman who was in a love-less, sex-less marriage. Things were GREAT, especially the sex!! We were very compatible. We traveled/adventured, liked the same things and really enjoyed each other very much. We broke up because she wanted to give her marriage another chance. So if she hadn't been married (at all) I do think we would have had a great relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Lotus_Luna Posted February 8, 2019 Share Posted February 8, 2019 @LL are u still with him? Yes We both have changed a lot over the relationship. It has a strong healing energy from childhood and relationship traumas. I know thats not typical of an affair. But he is a dear friend, I do respect him greatly. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Naivewomen Posted February 8, 2019 Share Posted February 8, 2019 @LL I'm happy for you!!. Link to post Share on other sites
Lotus_Luna Posted February 9, 2019 Share Posted February 9, 2019 @LL I'm happy for you!!. Thank you, but it isnt perfect. Our relationship my not be a cloche but it has it’s struggles too. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
burnt Posted February 9, 2019 Share Posted February 9, 2019 NO. It's been six years since the start of the affair which last a bit over a year. Time brings perspective that no-one can make you understand. Six years ago, I would have given up my entire world, everything about myself and followed him to the end of the world without thinking with blind love. I came to this site thinking everyone was different from me--I was the exception that I was the one who discovered true undying love. Now... I would much rather be raped now than spend a single second in his company. Link to post Share on other sites
pepperbird Posted February 9, 2019 Share Posted February 9, 2019 NO. It's been six years since the start of the affair which last a bit over a year. Time brings perspective that no-one can make you understand. Six years ago, I would have given up my entire world, everything about myself and followed him to the end of the world without thinking with blind love. I came to this site thinking everyone was different from me--I was the exception that I was the one who discovered true undying love. Now... I would much rather be raped now than spend a single second in his company. That is a very extreme statement. Was it that bad? Link to post Share on other sites
burnt Posted February 9, 2019 Share Posted February 9, 2019 That is a very extreme statement. Was it that bad? Yes. I joined this site a few years ago following the end of the affair. I wrote many posts replying to other people's stories, but to this day I never wrote my whole story here. It's unusual and unique. Ugly in the way I got treated. Everyone in my life (friends, coworkers) knows of the affair story--I don't hide my life story from the people I interact with. If you knew the details, you would understand why I'd much rather deal with just about anything else than ever spend a single second in his company. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted February 9, 2019 Share Posted February 9, 2019 You'd do it knowing he'd just cheat on you and expect you to be cool about it. Link to post Share on other sites
DKT3 Posted February 9, 2019 Share Posted February 9, 2019 Kinda along the lines of what burnt said, I think most women would say yes in the affair or shortly after it ending unless its was like my wife or Recent Change where there recognized from the start the the AP wasnt someone they would be interested in long term. With time and distance that opinion or feeling tend to rotate 180°. Hard to see the flaws and damage from too close. In my personal opinion I could never be with a woman if I wanted another. Link to post Share on other sites
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