Jump to content

Ignoring her to get a definitive answer?


Recommended Posts

Hi everyone, hope your week is going well! This girl is sending me “mixed signals” and usually when that’s the case it just means she’s not interested, but I would like to know for sure.

 

Rundown:

We were friends in high school

We went to college and she disappeared

2 years into college we match on tinder, talk for a bit, never meet up and move on

2 years after that we randomly meet at bar, talk the whole night, she gives me her number, I don’t follow up and move on

2 years after that (I know, lots of 2 year gaps) she reaches out to me out of nowhere and we have a super long conversation, I said we should hang and she agrees

I invite her out a few days later and she says she’ll let me know, she never does, we talk a bit over the next month with her starting a lot of the convos and I just move to the next girl

4 months pass and I ask her if she wants to hangout on New Year’s Eve, she said she had to check her plans and we start talking everyday for a month with her starting 50% of the convos, ultimately she doesn’t come out

The next week I invite her to get dinner with me, she said she might not be home and doesn’t follow up

 

So now I’m just kinda done playing this game or wasting my time, I think if I ignore her and move on I’ll be able to judge her reaction (or lack of one) better. What do you guys think? Good move?

Link to post
Share on other sites

Seems by your outline of events she's just not interested. Ignoring her is probably the best route: not to judge her reaction, but simply because she's not interested.

 

Move on.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Yeah that's what I feel too, but then its like, stop reaching out to me lol leave me alone

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Link to post
Share on other sites

There's no law saying you have to respond. You don't even have to give a reason. Simply stop responding. If it becomes too much, you can block her number. (Hopefully it won't go that far, but that's always an option if required.)

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Oh no lmao blocking is way too much, I haven’t even blocked a single ex I had yet, I’m hardly gonna block a girl who’s just looking for attention. I stopped responding to her snaps unless I get something meaningful

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't understand why you need more time to understand what is happening. She's just not that into. It's not going to get more clear in time because it will remain the same. Just move on. When she pops up if it's convenient & entertaining, talk to her but don't expect meaningful responses or for her to show up.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Nothing wrong with waiting it out, my last gf straight up told me she wasn’t attracted to me and only viewed me as friend and then we ended up having sex and dating for a year and half sometime after that

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm not saying don't wait . . .sort of. Just don't bank on her. Go out & date others. Don't sit by the phone at home.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Oh yeah def, I've had no problem moving on from her before lol I've had relationships between all these random instances of her dropping into my life, I just wanna know what her deal is

 

Like if I drop out of her life out of the blue and she has any sort of interest I'll get something of substance from her, if not she'll just keep viewing my stories and go silent, ya know?

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Link to post
Share on other sites

She sees you as an acquaintance/friend/high school pal nothing more.

 

 

I see no hint she is/was ever interested in you romantically so not sure why you can't just be friends.

There is no need to be overdramatic and ignore or block.

As she sees you as a friend it would be pretty rude of you to do so.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

There's nothing overdramatic about it, she's not really my friend lol

 

It's been about 2-3 years since I seen her in person, that's acquaintance level at best, no need for constant contact if she's not really in my life

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Link to post
Share on other sites
loversquarrel

The message is in the medium. I can't tell you how many times I have posted this. Once again a woman is telling you what she wants/doesn't want and you just aren't listening.

 

If she was into you, you would have known a couple of two year gaps ago. Just ignore her or treat her kind of coldly, unless you just want to be friends.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I just think she's not into you and never was. I've had many guy friends tell me I'm sending mixed signals, when the the truth is I was never into them and whatever "signals" they got was wishful thinking.

 

And just like you, they cut off contact hoping for a reaction, but I never really cared because if I was into them, we would have dated already. If you cut contact, I doubt you'll get any reaction at all. You've known this woman since high school and nothing has happened since then despite all of your communication.

 

She's just not into you man.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Eh, that's fine with me either way, I'm still gonna cut her off. I never see her in person and I have (god bless) a group of 8 friends I've had for over a decade, I don't need anymore, and she's wasting my time by reaching out repeatedly, on to the next!

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...