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30 something amputee


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Old 10th November 2018, 1:13 PM   #1
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30 something amputee

Hi people,

Many thanks for having me.
I became an Amputee 6 years ago when I lost half my leg. My ex wife also left me for another guy while I was in hospital. (That didn't help my confidence)
I now walk around perfectly and when I'm wearing trousers people can't even tell I am an Amputee. However, I haven't even had a single date in the 6 years since my amputation. I am super scared about how to even approach a woman and what do I even say....do I want them to see my leg straight away? I don't want it to then shock them if I don't reveal it for a while..
Can a lady even be attracted to a guy with one leg? I am so scared about dating that I don't even know where to start.

Many thanks for any advice you guys and girls can give me.

Paul UK.
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Old 10th November 2018, 2:24 PM   #2
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Welcome to LS! It is indeed hard to do, but there are a select group of people who can enjoy men with a prosthetic leg. It will just take a lot more patience and tolerance of bad behavior before you find your favourite. What I suggest as a beginning step, is to do social activities where there are a lot of women. In that way you can at least start building your confidence back. Heck there is a famous youtube act/ personal life coach who has no limbs at all, and is a star for his determination.
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Old 10th November 2018, 4:30 PM   #3
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I once swiped right (on a dating site) on a guy in a wheelchair - I found him attractive and extremely intelligent which is the most important thing to me. We ended up never going on a date - I think he didn't make the effort or was traveling, can't recall. He made it very clear in his pics that he was in a wheelchair.

There are all kinds of people in the world, and we can all find at least one person who loves us just the way we are... or at least I hope so!

Yes I would make your situation clear so you only attract the right women for you.
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Old 10th November 2018, 5:29 PM   #4
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I wouldn't hesitate to date an amputee. From someone on the outside looking in, a partly missing limb is nothing compared to a good personality.
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Old 10th November 2018, 5:35 PM   #5
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Thank you all for the kind responses. I guess it's more of an issue in my head than anyone elses. It's still so difficult though.
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Old 10th November 2018, 5:53 PM   #6
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If you have a good attitude, I'd think you'd have no problem finding a woman.
I recently made friends with an amputee on Facebook, he lost his leg in Iraq.
Long story short, he got abusive via messenger because I refused to engage with him all day every day. When I called him out on his abusive messages he went on and on about his military training and his PTSD as if that was an excuse for treating me badly. Don't be this guy!! He ended up blocked.
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Old 10th November 2018, 5:53 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by PBUK View Post
Can a lady even be attracted to a guy with one leg? I am so scared about dating that I don't even know where to start.
I matched with an amputee and would date sure. He was hot, fit, wise and ambitious, beyond his years it seemed. This was online and a few of his profile pics included his prosthetic and he has a link to his social media for the story about his leg. So that's one way. You could also mention it on a first date if these are women you meet in the "real world". I don't know if it would seem odd to wait until later to mention it. I think up front is better cause you weed out those who will mind and cut to the good ones. I'm sorry about your ex wife leaving at that time, that is really awful. I think that by rebuilding your confidence you can be proud of who you are and don't stress if some women are put off, cause there are others who won't be phased.
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Old 10th November 2018, 7:21 PM   #8
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I matched with an amputee and would date sure. He was hot, fit, wise and ambitious, beyond his years it seemed. This was online and a few of his profile pics included his prosthetic and he has a link to his social media for the story about his leg. So that's one way. You could also mention it on a first date if these are women you meet in the "real world". I don't know if it would seem odd to wait until later to mention it. I think up front is better cause you weed out those who will mind and cut to the good ones. I'm sorry about your ex wife leaving at that time, that is really awful. I think that by rebuilding your confidence you can be proud of who you are and don't stress if some women are put off, cause there are others who won't be phased.
Thank you. I agree, I think being up front is definitely the way to go. Just need to get my confidence up.
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Old 10th November 2018, 7:23 PM   #9
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If you have a good attitude, I'd think you'd have no problem finding a woman.
I recently made friends with an amputee on Facebook, he lost his leg in Iraq.
Long story short, he got abusive via messenger because I refused to engage with him all day every day. When I called him out on his abusive messages he went on and on about his military training and his PTSD as if that was an excuse for treating me badly. Don't be this guy!! He ended up blocked.

Wow, what an absolute jerk that guy sounds!
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Old 10th November 2018, 8:12 PM   #10
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I fell in love with an amputee who lost the lower half of his leg as a young adult. He wore a prosthesis and in pants you wouldn't even know. It never bothered me, after all, none of us are perfect. To me, he was sexy and beautiful, my best friend, and I would have spent my life with him if the timing had been right for us.

To any woman who loves you, it won't matter.
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Old 10th November 2018, 8:22 PM   #11
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I fell in love with an amputee who lost the lower half of his leg as a young adult. He wore a prosthesis and in pants you wouldn't even know. It never bothered me, after all, none of us are perfect. To me, he was sexy and beautiful, my best friend, and I would have spent my life with him if the timing had been right for us.

To any woman who loves you, it won't matter.

That really does make me feel better. Thank you so much for sharing that. I guess the next step for me is to start socialising more. I have lived a very solitary life since my accident.
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Old 10th November 2018, 8:25 PM   #12
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You'll have to be up front about it because not everyone can deal with it, honestly, more out of feeling awkward and being not sure what to say than because of the physicality of it. Nurses and caretakers would be a more educated group about that sort of thing. Disabled women would too.
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Old 10th November 2018, 10:03 PM   #13
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That really does make me feel better. Thank you so much for sharing that. I guess the next step for me is to start socialising more. I have lived a very solitary life since my accident.
You're welcome, and good luck. Just be you and be confident in yourself. If you are rejected, keep moving on. I would suggest telling about it after a few dates, if she hasn't already discovered it by putting her hand on your leg. When he told me, I didn't blink. Someone had told me his foot was artificial (he didn't know I knew that) so when he said he had something to share with me about his leg, it didn't phase me.
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Old 10th November 2018, 10:03 PM   #14
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Listen to this man: not only is he an amputee, he has no limbs at all! He's successful and dashing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CfmAZb6EmlI
(Nick Vujicic)
If you are somebody who uses a prosthesis, with trousers, you will be blending in to everybody else. Now's the time for determination to meet as many people as possible.
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Old 10th November 2018, 10:54 PM   #15
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We all carry baggage.

I have many small children. What man would want a woman with a litter of kids and an emotionally unstable ex?

Youíre an amputee. While some may not be okay, Inreally canít think of a single woman who would turn you away.

I would suggest maybe some therapy to work on the trauma of your failed relationship coupled with the amputation. So when you decide youíre ready to date, youíre emotionally complete.
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