Alwayscats Posted October 2, 2018 Share Posted October 2, 2018 So I’ve been seeing this new guy for under a month and he has asked me to be his girlfriend so I said yes but then he said to me we can’t put it on Facebook because his ex will be upset :0. I don’t know what to do with myself. I feel so mad at this guy. Thing is it’s not just me I have to think about because I have my daughter too. I need some advice on this? I have asked him why he has said that and he said his ex threatened to kill herself if he got into a new relationship ... I get that he doesn’t want anybody to kill their self but what about me in all of this it’s making me feel really bad :,( I feel like I should move out of her way so he can be single for her... Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted October 2, 2018 Share Posted October 2, 2018 Never get involved with anyone who has unfinished business with someone else. This guy has unfinished business. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted October 2, 2018 Share Posted October 2, 2018 (edited) I can see your side ...but...is he obvious when he is out with you that he is with you ...like holding hands etc....when i split with my ex ....i was suicidal....adn one thing i did not have ...was my ex on facebook....there was no way in hell i could handle seeing kissy kissy face pics......i was raw....the break up was a whole mess of pain for me and my family...i am ashamed to say i felt really resentful that..my ex was living the high life with her and my girls were eating fish fingers in the dark...he stopped paying the electricity bill while i was in hospital.....literally eating in the dark until my angel friend took my girls in while i was trying to get treatment enough to live and move on...which i did....so i also understand the rawness of splitting with someone....and the toxicity of emotions....make you feel all kinds of wrong....made me feel even worse about myself....feeling anger and resentfulness ....really isnt who i am.... does your bf show you affection in public settings do all your friends know about the two of you..... does his family know does his friends know if the answer is yes....is facebook really important...what if you both gave it up?. i do understand your misgivings....but personal bias wise...i feel how upsetting it is to feel second rate looked over and left behind.....and when you are sick in your heart and mind not wanting to go on...it can ....be ....killer....that's why i never had my ex on facebook even though i was suicidal i was never dumb.... and to this day....even though we are friends ......i dont have him on facebook....maybe your bf should talk to her about unfriending and blocking each other for her own personal well being and his......a clean break where there is no contact and no facebook.....from experience it really helps you to get ready to move on from a break up..deb Edited October 2, 2018 by todreaminblue Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted October 2, 2018 Share Posted October 2, 2018 I don't understand why announcing your relationship of FB is important - it means nothing. However, the fact that he is still involved with his ex to the point of putting her feelings before yours in inappropriate and telling. Tell him straight out that he is either in a relationship with you or he's with her. Tell him to make the choice and act on it. Be firm. Link to post Share on other sites
ChatroomHero Posted October 2, 2018 Share Posted October 2, 2018 Not a good situation when his ex can dictate things you do in your relationship. I wouldn't seriously date anyone who's ex could determine what I do and when I do it outside of dropping off or picking up their kids. Any ex that has sway over what he puts on facebook like that will make threats all the time. His ex does not want to see him happy, so she will threaten to kill herself for other things because apparently it works. She sees you two out having dinner out? I'll kill myself. She sees you two at a grocery store? I'll kill myself. What's he going to do, tell you that you two can't be seen in public anymore? I would back off until he has his personal situations in order. Link to post Share on other sites
Mrin Posted October 2, 2018 Share Posted October 2, 2018 Just a FYI - I am not ok with becoming FB official for at least six months. And I don't have a crazy suicidal ex. Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted October 2, 2018 Share Posted October 2, 2018 Just a FYI - I am not ok with becoming FB official for at least six months. Why is "FB official" more significant than a declared exclusivity between the partners? Mr. Lucky 1 Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted October 2, 2018 Share Posted October 2, 2018 Never agree to be hidden in any way. It will eat at your self esteem. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Whodatdog Posted October 3, 2018 Share Posted October 3, 2018 Interesting he hasnt blocked his ex from Facebook. Id step back a bit until he cuts that cord. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts