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Losing hope


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Old 17th September 2018, 9:57 AM   #16
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Originally Posted by brigit87 View Post
43 is a good age to meet all the guys who are divorced from their first wife and have settled down to meet someone for a real relationship and make it stick.
Eh....

Some may be like that...As someone who knows a lot of men in these age ranges, a lot of them also fall into two categories....The first type that will take full advantage of the easy sex out there and are unwilling to "settle down" or the other type that is so pissed off at how badly they got screwed by their divorce, that the last thing they want to do is deal with women and a relationship..

Also, the "better quality" higher tier(good looking/fit/rich/accomplished) guys in this age range will usually only date women their age if they are very good looking and have a great body...Otherwise they dip from the pool of younger women...

I think many women in this age range will struggle...They'll find a lot of guys willing to bang them, but they may find it hard to find a good guy that wants to settle down...Also remember most of these guys have younger kids that take up a lot of their time and energy...


As for the OP...

You gotta get rid of the black cloud over your head...Then maybe things become clearer and you present a better package to the world...People pick up on it....It becomes a downer..

TFY
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Old 17th September 2018, 10:48 AM   #17
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Your friend has a point. Women our age struggle more than men in their 50s.


Over the last few years, I have realized that if I wanted my equal in a male form, that's not gonna be possible. He is chasing 20 year olds. So for me, only options are to date men that barely have jobs/money and/or are pudgy/old looking and/or have substance abuse problem etc etc. In other words, lower tier men due to women our age being devalued. I opted out because I can't accept "selling my house under the fair price" so to speak. Luckily, I am a loner by nature so it is way more enjoyable than dating.


I haven't 100% given up hope. I am not religious but if I am going to meet someone, he is going to have to appear as I go about my normal life and make the first move. And it will have to be real chemistry on all levels. No OLD or going out of my way in any shape of form anymore. I know that my chances are slim to none but I am quite happy with that.
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Old 17th September 2018, 12:21 PM   #18
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Originally Posted by Eternal Sunshine View Post
Your friend has a point. Women our age struggle more than men in their 50s.


Over the last few years, I have realized that if I wanted my equal in a male form, that's not gonna be possible. He is chasing 20 year olds. So for me, only options are to date men that barely have jobs/money and/or are pudgy/old looking and/or have substance abuse problem etc etc. In other words, lower tier men due to women our age being devalued. I opted out because I can't accept ''selling my house under the fair price'' to speak.
Hmmmm. Not devalued by me. Now you have me wondering, ET. You say you are OP's age, early 40s. Granted 40-something men with something going for them are chasing 20s and 30s. But what about older guys, with jobs or money and not pudgy, old looking, or substance abusers? How old would you go? Not that I personally would rob THAT cradle (but would think it GREAT if women in the 52 to 56 range showed interest), but the half age plus seven 'rule' would open 40 something women to men in their 60s and early seventies. On the other hand at 64, the youngest woman who has shown interest in me is 57. On OLD many women as old as 60 have expressed preference for and in some cases (POF) have automatically blocked men older than they are. For example, would you date OP's 52 y/o male friend if he had a job or money, looked good, and had no substance abuse issues?
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Old 18th September 2018, 8:24 PM   #19
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ES, you and OP seem to be giving up to early.

Is there a particular age after which you noticed you’re getting less desirable?

IME if the woman is good looking, has no baggage (kids, exes) and not pressuring for insta-marriage or babies, men are very open to older women...


Quote:
Originally Posted by Eternal Sunshine View Post
Your friend has a point. Women our age struggle more than men in their 50s.


Over the last few years, I have realized that if I wanted my equal in a male form, that's not gonna be possible. He is chasing 20 year olds. So for me, only options are to date men that barely have jobs/money and/or are pudgy/old looking and/or have substance abuse problem etc etc. In other words, lower tier men due to women our age being devalued. I opted out because I can't accept "selling my house under the fair price" so to speak. Luckily, I am a loner by nature so it is way more enjoyable than dating.


I haven't 100% given up hope. I am not religious but if I am going to meet someone, he is going to have to appear as I go about my normal life and make the first move. And it will have to be real chemistry on all levels. No OLD or going out of my way in any shape of form anymore. I know that my chances are slim to none but I am quite happy with that.
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Old 19th September 2018, 6:54 AM   #20
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Originally Posted by No_Go View Post
ES, you and OP seem to be giving up to early.

Is there a particular age after which you noticed you’re getting less desirable?

IME if the woman is good looking, has no baggage (kids, exes) and not pressuring for insta-marriage or babies, men are very open to older women...
True enough. My grandmother had men chasing her when she was in her 80's. She wound up marrying a doctor had a nice marriage then received a lot of money when he passed.

OP stay off line. Go in the real world and you'l do fine.
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