the_opposite_sex Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 Women, maybe you can help me out w/ this. K i'm a woman too...with that said, I don't really understand my own "sex" It seems like wherever my b/f and I go, there's a girl putting her hands on my b/f somehow. Last night we went to this pizza place. Our waitress was a real outgoing character *which my b/f is too*...however, she was real touchy feely w/ my b/f, even the ppl we went with noticed it. I dont know if it was just her personality or what, but I found it kinda disrespectful seeing as his g/f *ME* was sittin right next to him! There have been a few other instances where girls have done this w/ me being right there, but I wont go into 'em. I addressed my b/f about it, tryin to sound like i wasn't accusing of him anything, which i wasnt. It's nothing he has any control over and he wasn't "flirting" back, he was just having a good time and being himself. I trust him 100%. It doesn't help that i'm semi-jealous anyways. Anyway, what do you guys think? Link to post Share on other sites
sarah12 Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 The reason they do this is because your bf has let them be touchy feely with him and he has responded to it, when you haven't been around. Girls don't just go and give any guy attention repeatedly if it wasn't reciprocated some time either in the past or whenever you're not around. He isn't going to tell you the truth if you ask him about it, but trust me, it's happening. The best way to go about it would be to let him know that it's disrespectful of these girls to be doing this and there better not be any nonsense going on behind your back. Link to post Share on other sites
Author the_opposite_sex Posted June 13, 2005 Author Share Posted June 13, 2005 hmm you kinda got me a little scared now heh I know that wasn't your intention but yea. Like i said, I do trust him completely and I KNOW he wouldn't EVER cheat on me. I've been w/ him 4 yrs now, so far so good. He's one to be touchy feely too tho at times to ppl he knows, but its never in a sexual way and he does it in front of me. I dont know, he kept asking me what was wrong on the way home from that pizza place and I told him it was that waitress. It's very important to him that I trust him...so that's a big plus in my book that he's more then likely not doin anything behind my back. Link to post Share on other sites
sarah12 Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 OK so he probably just does it for fun without it meaning anything, it is happening cause these things don't usually just come outta left field. And I only know this b/c I've been one of those single girls that attached guys do this to and I don't really appreciate it at all. It was fun to flirt a bit while we're single, but not when they're attached. One guy even grabbed my ass while his gf stood next to him. So if you trust him, then there should be nothing to worry about right? Link to post Share on other sites
Author the_opposite_sex Posted June 13, 2005 Author Share Posted June 13, 2005 right...i'm not worried about him. He was even holding my hand at the end of the meal, once we were done eating. I'm just trying to get an understanding as to why women do this, ESPECIALLY when they see that the guy is with a girl. I mean, yes, it could be a relative or something, but still i mean, c'mon! They dont know! We kinda came to the conclusion that the reason she was the way she was is b/c he became part of this "club" thing that their promoting and if she could get a customer to sign up for it, then she gets a bonus at work. Also, she seen that he was an easy goin guy....AND she wasn't just addressing him, she made eye contact w/ me quite a bit and was real sweet to me. Just dont understand girls sometimes lol Link to post Share on other sites
chaos70 Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 Not sure if it pertains... I had this good friend of mine who had an extremely hot wife and roommate. One night they invite me out for drinks. Somehow ended up a famous strip club with them. I said...ok...this is odd, but probably not uncommon...chicks can go to strip clubs. So he and grab a table and ordered some beers for us and some drinks for them. So over the loudspeaker, "guy, get ready for amateur night!". And there they were...naked as can be both his wife and the roommate. At first I was totally shocked and couldn't even look at them because I just was in shock...kinda of like walking into a room with somebody naked and immediately looking away to respect their privacy. Then he prods me, "go tip my wife...what...you don't think she is hot?". At this point...I shuffle nervously up and continuing trying not to look up...slip a dollar in the garter belt. That was most uncomfortable night of my life. I got over it but still felt awkward. I personally don't mind casual flirting among my SO and others...but I draw the line at some gropping and nudity. Maybe that's the way I roll...but that's me. Link to post Share on other sites
UltimateZen Posted June 13, 2005 Share Posted June 13, 2005 Originally posted by sarah12 The reason they do this is because your bf has let them be touchy feely with him and he has responded to it... I do not agree. I have a very outgoing personality and my fiance and I trust each other 100%. My personality as well as your b/f's is attractive to both men and women. People like to laugh and they migrate to people who can make them chuckle. The human touch is, at most times, a natural response in getting closer to what makes you feel good. I make people laugh all the time and I enjoy talking to people because I find them interesting. People, not just women, pat me on the back, or pat my arm just because they are enjoying my company. My fiance understands this and she is proud of the fact that people take a liking to me. I do not encourage touchy feely responses, but I will not stop a conversation just to say "Hey, don't touch pat me on the back." Obviously a touch on the arm, the back, etc, is acceptable. A touch on the chest, the leg, or the buttocks is obviously not. And that is where the line is drawn. Set your boundries on what you would term as acceptable. Enjoy your b/f's company and relish in the fact that he has such a great personality and people are attracted to it. You should even feel proud knowing that he is yours and that people admire you for being with him. As long as you are committed to one another, trusting, and have open lines of communication my advise is to change your mindset and to enjoy your b/f because he makes others, and especially you feel good. Link to post Share on other sites
Author the_opposite_sex Posted June 13, 2005 Author Share Posted June 13, 2005 UltimateZen, you are probly right. I guess it's harder to understand where he is coming from b/c even though I do have an outgoing personality around ppl I know, i'm more laid back around newbies. He's the opposite of that....outgoing 24/7. Nothing wrong w/ that at all. I love him for who he is. And that's how my b/f is....he likes to make ppl laugh. I mean his idol is Chris Farley if that tells you anything lol But thanks for the advice, it really opened my eyes Link to post Share on other sites
UltimateZen Posted June 14, 2005 Share Posted June 14, 2005 Originally posted by the_opposite_sex I mean his idol is Chris Farley if that tells you anything Hmmm. Chris Farley....I must say that your b/f knows his comedians. Best to you and your b/f. Link to post Share on other sites
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