KevCA31 Posted February 15, 2017 Share Posted February 15, 2017 It seems to me that everyone I meet is only interested in themselves and don't really care about the other person. They are only interested in what is most convenient and easiest for themselves. If there is a dispute the person is only interested in their own viewpoint and yours is wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
Ronni_W Posted February 15, 2017 Share Posted February 15, 2017 KevCA31, If this is your most-frequent experience with the people in your circle of influence and your social circle, then it is time for you to branch out to create for yourself a more loving and compassionate group of friends who do value mutually supportive, encouraging and inspiring relationships. You are under no obligation to cater to selfish, demanding people; nor to keep yourself down, in the background or suppressed by them. However. If you do allow and accept that for yourself, then you cannot blame them for your own voluntary, free-will decisions and choices. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted February 15, 2017 Share Posted February 15, 2017 Yes it is and these same people become the biggest victim ever when they are treated like that. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted February 15, 2017 Share Posted February 15, 2017 Sounds like a generation who weren't often told no or held to any standard or taught to be empathetic either. You have to teach empathy by modeling it and expecting it. There was a Yale study that showed that babies were NOT born "good." They had to be taught to be good. It showed them being mean to those who didn't like what they did and favoring those most like them, naturally, and an experiment showed slightly older young kids would choose to punish the kids who weren't like them or didn't like what they did for no reason. One of the conclusions is even if you model empathy, which is good, of course, you still have to make the kid behave and not be mean to someone or they can just end up without any care about other people. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
DarrenB Posted February 15, 2017 Share Posted February 15, 2017 People lack common decency, courtesy and compassion. I agree... as far as empathy towards others goes, I think a lot of people lack that also. A lot of people are selfish, and they make every advantage they can and ridicule and use other people/situations for their own benefit. It's demoralizing, but it's the life we live. Ce'st La Vie. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
normal person Posted February 16, 2017 Share Posted February 16, 2017 It seems to me that everyone I meet is only interested in themselves and don't really care about the other person. They are only interested in what is most convenient and easiest for themselves. If there is a dispute the person is only interested in their own viewpoint and yours is wrong. I agree wholeheartedly. Even some of the seemingly nicest, most compassionate people really only care about themselves at the end of the day and would rather not have to do anything that wasn't comfortable or convenient for them, even if they've been in the opposite place before. At the end of the day, most people are only in it for themselves. I'd say that's my biggest frustration with modern day interpersonal relationships. That being said, I've found that if you're someone who bucks the trend and empathizes when you could ignore, or helps when it's of no benefit to you, it can really make a difference to someone in a world where most other people wouldn't make the effort. At the same time, things can get really frustrating when you do those things and aren't reciprocated the same things by the world in other instances. Link to post Share on other sites
ZayKayWill Posted February 16, 2017 Share Posted February 16, 2017 Yes but that's life. Animals are selfish by nature, especially humans. Link to post Share on other sites
Sweetfish Posted February 16, 2017 Share Posted February 16, 2017 Yes but that's life. Animals are selfish by nature, especially humans. But our parents and society teaches us how to regulate this selfishness. This new generation is not doing a good job. Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted February 16, 2017 Share Posted February 16, 2017 i believe it isnt rare especially when it is you who is the empath.....not only do I believe its not rare...i can't believe for my own personal sanity that empathy is rare.....everybody can be an empath..and be empathetic ..its there for the giving and has been given of freely..........i just believe most people most fo th etime are inactive empaths..who when needed ....or face situations that are rather trying that test the metal of who they really are.....they then,can empathetic..i am an empath......deb Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted February 16, 2017 Share Posted February 16, 2017 (edited) As a member of a resident action group, I have been blown away at the wonderful people I've met. People who try to move heaven and earth to protect their community. I know people who are undertaking challenges to help raise funds for cancer. School leaders, volunteers in all areas of need...young people, old people who all do things to help others. Just the other day, I was being snappy and my teenage daughter asked me if I was OK. (I wasn't OK and was grateful to her for reaching out) Yes, there are selfish people. There always have been and always will be. But the world is a much nicer place if you take time to be grateful for the good instead of critical of the bad. Edited February 16, 2017 by basil67 Link to post Share on other sites
JustGettingBy Posted February 16, 2017 Share Posted February 16, 2017 "these days"? You act like its a new thing. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted February 16, 2017 Share Posted February 16, 2017 I think there's a strong connection with lack of empathy and the lack of religion we see so much of lately. You aren't going to follow how Jesus tells you to treat your neighbors or know about doing for the least of us when you don't believe in God because you think you are God. Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted February 16, 2017 Share Posted February 16, 2017 I think there's a strong connection with lack of empathy and the lack of religion we see so much of lately. You aren't going to follow how Jesus tells you to treat your neighbors or know about doing for the least of us when you don't believe in God because you think you are God. I don't believe the two are related. Everyone has a conscience (most anyway). Sure organized religion can encourage empathy...but either you got it or you don't. Studies show it's very difficult for an adult to grow empathy bigger...it's just not very useful to expect it if someone doesn't have it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted February 16, 2017 Share Posted February 16, 2017 I don't believe the two are related. Everyone has a conscience (most anyway). Sure organized religion can encourage empathy...but either you got it or you don't. Studies show it's very difficult for an adult to grow empathy bigger...it's just not very useful to expect it if someone doesn't have it. I don't know why you're arguing that the two are not related. Christianity is on the decline yet you say organized religion helps to produce empathy. That makes no sense. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted February 16, 2017 Share Posted February 16, 2017 I think there's a strong connection with lack of empathy and the lack of religion we see so much of lately. You aren't going to follow how Jesus tells you to treat your neighbors or know about doing for the least of us when you don't believe in God because you think you are God. I know some very caring Christians in real life. And I know some seriously judgmental Christians too...the kind I'd never have in my life. I know caring athiests and some really judgmental athiests who I avoid too. Given what I see in real life, I can't see that Christianity has anything to do with being a good person. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted February 16, 2017 Share Posted February 16, 2017 I know some very caring Christians in real life. And I know some seriously judgmental Christians too...the kind I'd never have in my life. I know caring athiests and some really judgmental athiests who I avoid too. Given what I see in real life, I can't see that Christianity has anything to do with being a good person. Saying you're a Christian and living like a Christian are two different things entirely. You're right about that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted February 16, 2017 Share Posted February 16, 2017 I don't know why you're arguing that the two are not related. Christianity is on the decline yet you say organized religion helps to produce empathy. That makes no sense. That's not what I said. Obviously most religions encourage others to consider how they affect others and others feelings. Prayers and the Bible show them how but it doesn't guarantee empathy in people. But it's impossible to force someone to become empathetic if they just aren't. Link to post Share on other sites
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