Empty nest

[mikeylo]

My wife and I are so not looking forward to the empty nest ! Our son , is leaving home next year and we both will be on our own. It is going to be good and bad both.

 

Any empty Nestors here ? How do you deal ? What do you do ?

[Els]

My parents are facing this problem. I'm trying to alleviate it by recommending that they enjoy their retirement and the freedom it gives them. Look at it this way, this is one of the rare times in your life when you will have the holy trifecta - money, lots of free time, and decent health. This is a huge deal, usually people are limited by one of the three, but if you have all 3 you can do whatever you want!

 

Surely there are things you have always wanted to do but just didn't have the time/money/freedom to do so previously? Hike some long distance trail? Travel the world? Go teach kids in Africa? Start a business? Write a book? The list is endless, the world is literally your oyster.

[Mr. Lucky]

Any empty Nestors here ? How do you deal ? What do you do ?

 

I'm a serial empty nester because my millennials keep bouncing back home, can't get rid of them. I enjoy their company - my wife even more - but wonder if we're doing them a favor delaying the launch into adulthood.

 

I'm still working because I enjoy it and the money's good. My wife fills her days with volunteer work and hanging with the kids. Life is good ...

 

Mr. Lucky

[mikeylo]

Thanks! My son and I have always been very close and though I always knew that this time would come, I guess when it ultimately is almost here, im not taking it well !

 

Its time for my wife and I to go back to being a couple in love , dating , doing stuff that we put off and enjoying our golden years together

[Els]

Thanks! My son and I have always been very close and though I always knew that this time would come, I guess when it ultimately is almost here, im not taking it well !

 

I am sure he will still call/visit you.

 

Its time for my wife and I to go back to being a couple in love , dating , doing stuff that we put off and enjoying our golden years together

 

That's the spirit!

[Mr. Lucky]

Thanks! My son and I have always been very close and though I always knew that this time would come, I guess when it ultimately is almost here, im not taking it well !

 

I tried to look at their leaving as a "win", they're embarking on the life you've worked to prepare them for. Easier said than done .

 

Its time for my wife and I to go back to being a couple in love , dating , doing stuff that we put off and enjoying our golden years together

 

Hopefully you've been doing a low-key version of this all along. It's a challenge for us because I'm active and outside oriented, wife is not. We've learned to indulge each other...

 

Mr. Lucky

[Rockdad]

We were those very involved parent types, never missed an event, hauled one son and his band all over creation to his gigs when he started in music (now a professional rock drummer) I was born to be a dad and never wasted a day of it. That being said, we did our job and did it well.

 

My wife cried for a day and half when our last son launched and as she said "Oh I got over it!" from the age of 15 I began to drill into our 3 sons that Dad installed a one way door, once you walk out it, it doesn't open the other way. There was never a question in their minds moving back was not an option. So they didn't quit jobs, get a girl pregnant and bring them all back for us to support. I watched to many of my friends have their kids bounce in and out and suck the life and finances out of the them.

 

How do we handle the empty nest? We love it! We love to be together and finally get to to activities that we want to do. And oddly enough I found some extra $$$ left in my pocket.

[Redhead14]

My wife and I are so not looking forward to the empty nest ! Our son , is leaving home next year and we both will be on our own. It is going to be good and bad both.

 

Any empty Nestors here ? How do you deal ? What do you do ?

 

I took pride in the fact that I had successfully raised my children to be independent and self-sufficient individuals who are capable of taking care of themselves in the world. And then, I started making plans for myself to do things I had put off for years because I couldn't do them while raising children.

 

It is now time to focus on the relationship between you and your wife and continuing to build it. While raising children sometimes couples are kinda operating on auto-pilot and now you will be getting to know each other again. Trust me, it may be a little awkward between you for a bit because there is no buffer -- i.e. kids. And, when you retire, it will be a similar situation. So go out and enjoy yourselves

[cocorico]

My wife and I are so not looking forward to the empty nest ! Our son , is leaving home next year and we both will be on our own. It is going to be good and bad both.

 

Any empty Nestors here ? How do you deal ? What do you do ?

 

We're empty nesters and we couldn't be happier! Here off, living their own lives, surviving and thriving. Our space is our own once more, and our time (and other resources) and our whole future is open to us. We're free to think big, long term, not just who will be fetching kids from karate or is there still enough food in the fridge for supper.

[Gaeta]

My daughter moved out at 22. She just turned 29.

 

I was 42 when she moved out and I was not ready to let go of full-time motherhood. On top of that I was single so the nest was empty-empty. The day she moved out I cried like a baby on my way back home.

 

At first I was worried about everything, is she being safe, does she eat properly, etc. I would visit her and clean her place and cook for her. I would buy her extra food, kitchen accessories, bed sheets, name it. Then it slowly got into place. I'd say it took about a year for me to get fully ok with it.

 

Today we are even closer than when she was living home with me. We speak each day, we do activities together on weekly basis, we confine in each other.

 

When our kids are little we don't want them to grow up ever. We feel as they get older we're losing them. We don't lose them, the relationship changes. The relationship I have with my child as an adult woman has as many rewards as it had when she was a little girl with pony tails. It is as precious, maybe more.