Bobbi7 Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 So, I've been seeing this guy for 2 months now. Everything is great, in the beginning obviously he would always be the one to text me and set up dates or whatever or if there's a weekend that he's busy he would send me a funny meme. Last week, he didn't text me at all, so I decided to contact him first and see if he wanted to hang out, he replied and said that he had time and that we would get together on Friday. I then asked him only if he still wanted too, and he replied, "of course" what makes you think that I don't? Anyway, later he apologized for not "saying much recently." We met up this past weekend and everything was good, he told me about future plans, he payed for dinner, etc, etc. He then said just to text him and see what is going on for the weekend, he has things going on, he's got his own life and hobbies, so I'm not going to act desperate. It seems like the contact seems less frequent now. But I'm not going to initiate contact at all, I already did that last week. The last thing that I want to look like is clingy and needy. Link to post Share on other sites
Stage5Clinger Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 The dude is seeing another girl who probably doesn't like him as much as you do and he's hoping that works out and left you on the burner in case it falls out. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Bobbi7 Posted September 9, 2015 Author Share Posted September 9, 2015 Yeah, but then why would he talk about "future plans?" Or maybe I'm just being too clingy and needy at this point? Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 Oh wow, "Don't wait for my call, you call me...and, then I'll see if I can squeeze you in"? Got it, I'd give him a wide birth... I wouldn't call it a "fade", but an 'I'm not putting any effort into this cuz I'm not that interested anymore and/or am seeing others and am too lazy to tell you it's not working out'. I mean, to me in a fade situation he'd say "Don't call me, I'll call you" and then you don't hear from him ever. This is more of a, 'I'll still take a bite at you if you check in with me and I got 5 min to spend with you, but if something else better comes around - you're toast'. Link to post Share on other sites
rester Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 Have you initiated any contact with him at all in these two months, or do you wait for him to contact you every time? I think two months is a long time to not have some kind of back and forth going. If after a couple dates I never heard from a woman unless I initiated the contact, I'd think she wasn't interested. It almost sounds like you are so afraid of being needy and clingy that you're being the opposite. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Bobbi7 Posted September 9, 2015 Author Share Posted September 9, 2015 Have you initiated any contact with him at all in these two months, or do you wait for him to contact you every time? I think two months is a long time to not have some kind of back and forth going. If after a couple dates I never heard from a woman unless I initiated the contact, I'd think she wasn't interested. It almost sounds like you are so afraid of being needy and clingy that you're being the opposite. I usually wait until he initiates contact. Except for last week, I contacted him last week, and he was glad to see me on the weekend. Then, he told me to text him. Which, I'm not going to do. I'm going to wait and see if he contacts me this week. Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 Have you initiated any contact with him at all in these two months, or do you wait for him to contact you every time? I think two months is a long time to not have some kind of back and forth going. If after a couple dates I never heard from a woman unless I initiated the contact, I'd think she wasn't interested. It almost sounds like you are so afraid of being needy and clingy that you're being the opposite. I think RLs are a smooth back/forth between two people... There shouldn't be any hardcore "I'm waiting on him/her" to call me. But, if it's to the point where one party has to "chase down" the other person to just find out if they are gonna go out, then IMO, something's wrong. Besides, he already said for her to call him and "if" he's got time, he'll fit her in. I mean that screams "you're not a priority" here. I mean, we all are busy and have to look at our schedules to make time for a person - but if he would of said something like 'Hey, sorry I haven't contacted you for a date out, I've just had a lot going on...if that happens again, please forgive me, just give me a ring and we'll work something out'....Then, I would have been ok with that. Link to post Share on other sites
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