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Crazy crazy crazy about him!!! Should I make a move?


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He has just gone through a bad break up with his girlfriend of almost 2 years. I've been his best friend for longer than I can remember. And I've had these feelings for him it feels like even longer than that. I've been by his side in whatever he's been through, and he's been by mine as well. I hate to sound like "that woman" but if there are such things as soulmates, this would be it. The other night he said something that kind of stuck with me. I can't stop thinking about it. We were talking about his ex, and he said something "all this drama is driving me crazy, why can't I just find a girl like you?". I was flattered and blushed, but then I became extremely offended! Why can't he figure it out? He wants someone LIKE me, why not try ME? This is all really difficult for me. I have so many mixed emotions right now that it's clouding my judgment. I just wish I had an outsiders opinion. My girl friends are telling me to move on (believe me, I've tried) but I think they're just worried about me. I can't shake this off. It's been on my mind constantly. I feel like I'm going insane. Am I?

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Yes, make a move. But not directly. Put your feelings in writing, e-mail, etc. He will need time to process it and his feelings too. He will come around when he's ready.

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I would hold off a bit by telling him how you feel. He's still burning after the breakup and his mind isn't really clear so if you told him how you feel, and he responded, you would still only get part of him until he got the ex of of his system. Half a loaf of bread might be OK if your hungry but not in a relationship. It's got to be all in or you lose.

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Frank2thepoint
I can't stop thinking about it. We were talking about his ex, and he said something "all this drama is driving me crazy, why can't I just find a girl like you?".

 

Since you guys are best friends, I don't think he could see you as a girlfriend. This is a possibility you may have to accept.

 

 

I have so many mixed emotions right now that it's clouding my judgment.

 

But since you do have feelings for him, the only way you'll know for sure is if you tell him your feelings. Bring up his statement "why can't I just find a girl like you?" and ask him why not you? See what he says and take it from there.

 

 

But I do advise to wait a little while, such as a few days or a week before you do this. He is getting over a bad breakup.

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No do not make a move. It's too soon. He has only been out of his relationship for 2 weeks. He's not emotionally ready to date yet. If you act now you may end with a short term FWB relationship but I don't think you really want to be his rebound, do you?

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No do not make a move. It's too soon. He has only been out of his relationship for 2 weeks. He's not emotionally ready to date yet. If you act now you may end with a short term FWB relationship but I don't think you really want to be his rebound, do you?

 

Of course not. But I think I should tell him while he is single. What if he takes her back and I don't get the chance?

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You definitely need to tell him when he's single but if he takes her back you & him weren't meant to be.

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OP - it's one of two things either:

 

a) You're not his type physically. Most guys can't "grow" to be attracted to someone that's not their type.

 

b) You've known him so long that he thinks of you like a sister. In which case doing anything physical/sexual would literally feel like incest to him.

 

That being said - you should definitely make your feelings known if you are this obsessed. It will give you a definitive answer one way or the other. Which will help you get over him, but may risk your friendship...

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