without Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 Do you think, for a long term relationship, its essential to pick someone you love deeply and feel all the excitement with ? Or you can pick someone who you like very much but don't have the sparks with ? Link to post Share on other sites
Hawaii50 Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 it has to be a balance, as with all things. Link to post Share on other sites
denise_xo Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 I've heard about research stating that after twenty years of marriage, couple in arranged marriages are generally happier than those in love marriages. Presumably that's down to different sets of expectations. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 IMO, it depends upon each person's personality, emotional and attachment styles. There's no one universal answer. As an example, if I fall in love over time and a potential partner needs to feel 'in love' right away, we'll miss, whether that be my not feeling the same way she does at an early stage or that she doesn't feel 'sparks' right away and dismisses me as a potential. Neither of us are 'wrong' or 'right', rather we have different emotional and attachment styles, expressed through our personalities. Another person might not need to feel 'in love' at all. Personally, I wouldn't make a commitment to someone whom I didn't feel 'in love' with, which I define as a pervasive emotional feeling of attachment, prioritized above all other attachments. Like a song probably went, 'she's always on my mind', and in a healthy way. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author without Posted September 10, 2012 Author Share Posted September 10, 2012 it has to be a balance, as with all things. Care to explain more? Thanks everyone for sharing your thoughts with me. Link to post Share on other sites
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