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Slightly strange social question...


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How do you turn down invitations from acquaintances because you don't want to go out on the first couple days of your menstrual flow?

 

This isn't a troll question, I swear. :laugh: I feel absolutely crappy the first few days usually - I'll drag myself out of bed for stuff like work and school, but I don't feel like doing it for fun/social stuff. I just got invited to a social activity next week that I'm fairly certain will coincide with that (yeah, I can usually predict when it comes with incredible accuracy, good stuff). I can't accept and then turn it down later when I feel crappy cause I hate flaking, I feel weird telling them 'I'm going to have my period then' cause we're not close friends, but I can't really tell them 'Personal issues/reasons' because we're not THAT formal either.

 

Has anyone ever done this? What do you do? Or do you just suck it up and go even though you feel crappy?

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I suck it up even when I feel crappy.

 

I've had too many times in my life when there were No social invitations so I never want to decline when they arrive....

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That's a fair point, Carrie.

 

I guess I just find it really hard to enjoy myself and be social with cramps, diarrhea, and persistent pain. And I'm not good at hiding it, so it shows.

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Could you make up a lie, say your parents are coming into town and you have stuff planned. Something they would understand flaking for. If it wasn't almost 3am I could come up with a better lie but something along those lines.

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Heck, who says you have to lie? What about simply saying, "I'm very sorry but I won't be able to attend"? It seems that society lately has been saying we must give excuses for why we can't go to a party. Screw that. Sometimes I just don't feel like going and say "Sorry...I can't make it". The end. No lies. No drama. Take care of you and that's that.

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"Sorry, I can't make it. I have a conflict."

 

No one ever asks what the conflict is. Sometimes the conflict is simply that I don't want to go :laugh: (conflict in my mind!)

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Heck, who says you have to lie? What about simply saying, "I'm very sorry but I won't be able to attend"? It seems that society lately has been saying we must give excuses for why we can't go to a party. Screw that. Sometimes I just don't feel like going and say "Sorry...I can't make it". The end. No lies. No drama. Take care of you and that's that.

 

I agree with this.

I would also add "Hopefully next time!" - that's only if you like them and would want an invite the next time. :)

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january2011
"Sorry, I can't make it. I have a conflict."

 

No one ever asks what the conflict is. Sometimes the conflict is simply that I don't want to go :laugh: (conflict in my mind!)

 

I use this. Except that I don't mention the conflict bit. I just say that I can't make it. If people ask, then I'll say that I've got something else on. But mostly, people aren't that inquisitive.

 

Having said that, if the event really interested me, I'd pop a couple of painkillers and try to make it. I've sat 3-hour exams on the first day of my period before and aced them - granted usng the painkiller solution. There's no reason why your period should hold you back. But if you really know you couldn't drag yourself out to see them, then don't do it.

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Thanks, guys, I think I'll do that.

 

I do use painkillers, but they don't fully prevent the pain. Not for me anyways.The diarrhea-related stomach discomfort doesn't go away with painkillers either. :(

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january2011
Thanks, guys, I think I'll do that.

 

I do use painkillers, but they don't fully prevent the pain. Not for me anyways.The diarrhea-related stomach discomfort doesn't go away with painkillers either. :(

 

In which case, it depends on the timing. I know I'm usually good for the first 6-12 hours. Then for the next 3 hours or so, it's like dizziness/fever/diarrhea-city and I'm either hugging the toilet or lying in bed trying to sleep it off. Once I've cleared my system and had a bit of a timeout, I feel better almost instantly - it's actually amazing how quickly it comes and goes. I still get some cramping but not the dizziness/fever/diarrhea again. Perhaps it's worth doing some more investigating/experimenting to see if there are other options. I think there's a period thread from today/yesterday that might be helpful.

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Eternal Sunshine

I take pain killers and suck it up. I don't turn anything down unless it's something I would turn down anyway.

 

Having said that, if I feel extremely unwell on the day, I cancel and say "Sorry I am not feeling well, next time!"

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Depends on the persons. If they are closer to me I will tell them I am not feeling well due to that time of the month. With others I would just say I don't feel well, I have a conflict, etc.

 

 

Why not just maybe, you have a couple things coming up but will know closer to the date and then see how you feel that day?

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