moonsilk Posted March 27, 2010 Share Posted March 27, 2010 I've had a massive crush on this guy for about two years(he's sooo different from other guys) and got the chance to work around him. I've had a hard time trying to be my self around him because i felt like i might mess things up. instead of doing alot of talking i would use body language to get his attention(i mean i say hi and things like that, but real conversations don't really happen). this didn't work because he still hasn't even ask me for my number/a date or anything(it's been over a year). his co-worker who i speak to on a regular basis(who i can see has a crush on me) says he's single and he likes me. he's not shy because he'll talk on his own with no problem. i mean he would give me body language back as well(lots of long eye contact, being very nice, playful and smiling). he just won't take that next step. i don't know though. he looks at me, but only into my eyes. never at my body(i'm pretty slim). is he turned off by my figure? as you know valentine's day had passed by not long ago. i figured if he really likes me, he'll at least try something around this time of the year. he didn't. it pissed me off. i had had enough and wanted him to at least get the message that if he wasn't going to make a move, other guys would. so i told his co-worker that i was going out with my boyfriend(i'm single though) because i know it would get back to him and if liked me he would get mad. days later i stayed away from him to see if i would get a reaction. nothing. he was still nice just.....he doesn't flirt with me anymore. hardly any eye contact and he's not as talkative. there's has to be something i can do because he's still single and always a gentleman. it's driving me crazy! Link to post Share on other sites
zebracolors Posted March 27, 2010 Share Posted March 27, 2010 this didn't work because he still hasn't even ask me for my number/a date or anything(it's been over a year). his co-worker who i speak to on a regular basis(who i can see has a crush on me) says he's single and he likes me. he's not shy because he'll talk on his own with no problem. i mean he would give me body language back as well(lots of long eye contact, being very nice, playful and smiling). he just won't take that next step. i don't know though. he looks at me, but only into my eyes. never at my body(i'm pretty slim). is he turned off by my figure? Let me get this straight. You are crushing on one of your co-workers, and someone else is crushing on you at the same time? Where it's bolded, are you referring to your object of affection, or the guy crushing on you? That aside, I strongly feel that it was not a good idea to even do a little white lie to try and entice this man. I would say it would backfire in any case, because now "Mr. Hot guy" is probably certain your now off limits even if he ever really was considering asking you out, and even if you were to tell that it was just a 'fib' that would be really be starting off on the wrong foot. Link to post Share on other sites
threebyfate Posted March 27, 2010 Share Posted March 27, 2010 This comes as no surprise. Any man or woman with an ounce of self-respect, will back off of anyone who's previously committed. The ones who find previously committed people attractive and go for it, are the ones who you don't want to get involved with, unless you're allergic to healthy relationships. Live and learn. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted March 27, 2010 Share Posted March 27, 2010 Simple. He's just not into you, because you are not his type. Just like the person crushing on you is not your type. Either that, or he's gay. Seriously. Take the hint.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author moonsilk Posted March 27, 2010 Author Share Posted March 27, 2010 he's not gay. i know that for a fact. i understand that i really messed up, but there has to be something i can do to fix the problem. Anything guys? Link to post Share on other sites
dazzle22 Posted March 27, 2010 Share Posted March 27, 2010 Well, you have dangled the "carrot" in front of him for 2 years and he hasn't bit, so short of grabbing him by the mane and forcing open his jaw...see what I mean? Important lesson life- people do what they want to do. We can't MAKE other people do ANYTHING they don't want to! Trust me on this. I've tried... Link to post Share on other sites
SadandConfusedWA Posted March 28, 2010 Share Posted March 28, 2010 This is easily fixed. Just tell the other guy that you and your "bf" broke up. But I really don't get the impression that the object of your affection is into you. Link to post Share on other sites
StrugglingS Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 This is easily fixed. Just tell the other guy that you and your "bf" broke up. But I really don't get the impression that the object of your affection is into you. Even easier than that - tell him you like him and see what happens. This is an equal opportunities world, sometimes the girl has to make the effort! Link to post Share on other sites
Malenfant Posted April 1, 2010 Share Posted April 1, 2010 he's not gay. i know that for a fact. i understand that i really messed up, but there has to be something i can do to fix the problem. Anything guys? yes, say you broke up with the guy then after a few weeks ask him out. quit with the games. batting your eyelids and then wondering why he hasnt asked you out isnt going to work. Link to post Share on other sites
Joe Normal Posted April 1, 2010 Share Posted April 1, 2010 he's not gay. i know that for a fact. i understand that i really messed up, but there has to be something i can do to fix the problem. Anything guys? Believe it or not, if someone isn't attracted to you, there isn't much you can do to change that fact. It's also possible he likes you, but won't go near you because you are a work colleague. Sensible guys don't poop where they eat. My recommendation is find another guy to "target". Link to post Share on other sites
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