Will this affect how my bf feels about me?

[XKatieX]

I never really felt like his mom liked me too much. When things were better between my boyfriend and I she seemed to like me more.

 

One time when my boyfriend and I were fighting and I was trying to talk to him, she answered the phone and told me to just leave him a lone in a very snappy tone and hung up the phone. (this was last year sometime)

 

Now recently my bf and i got into a fight and I tried to get ahold of him, I called him around midnight because thats when he got home from work..she answered and said whats your problem, why are you calling here so late, and hung up on me.

I wrote her an email the next day explaining why I called and that it wouldnt be an issue if he had a cell phone. She never wrote back or acknowledge it.

 

I've been very nice to her, I've never said anything bad about her. I've certainly never hung up on her or acted snappy to her. I also hate feeling like someone doesn't like me, especially the mother of someone I care for very much.

 

Now In my defense,I see it as the issue as he is 26 and still lives with his mother, and he doesn't have a cell phone,because he doesn't like them.

 

 

She once said never to think I didn't like her but this is before she started hanging up on me. I can't help but to think her actions towards me will change my bfs mind about me, he isn't talking to me now.

 

Your thoughts on this?

Edited March 13, 2010 by XKatieX

[anne1707]

Well to be honest, I would be annoyed if someone phoned that late. You may have woken them up for a start. Plus she may think that a call that late could be bad news so would be annoyed when it was you just wanting to speak to your boyfriend. Try and see this from her perspective.

[XKatieX]

Well to be honest, I would be annoyed if someone phoned that late. You may have woken them up for a start. Plus she may think that a call that late could be bad news so would be annoyed when it was you just wanting to speak to your boyfriend. Try and see this from her perspective.

 

Right, I see it from her view. I just don't think him or his mother see it from mine.

 

I look it at as if he had a cellphone or lived on his own (being 26) none of this would ever be a problem. So you can really see it as both ways..it depends on how you wanna look at it. Being 26, he should be able to live on his own without worrying if his mom is asleep or not, its just silly.

 

Thank you for your input

[anne1707]

But it is his choice not to have a mobile phone and to still live at home. So you have to deal with that and respect the boundaries that will impose.

[D-Lish]

But it is his choice not to have a mobile phone and to still live at home. So you have to deal with that and respect the boundaries that will impose.

 

Well said and so true.

 

I don't think you're helping your case by calling his home at midnight.

Instead of simply apologizing and leaving it at that, you tried to justify your actions to her- like you had some entitlement to call her home at midnight (when you absolutely didn't). If she was angry to begin with, tyring to justify your actions in that e-mail probably pushed her further over the edge.

 

The fact that your bf doesn't want a cell and lives at home with his mother is his choice. If it's something you can't deal with, then I'd consider moving on.