Bad cycle

[Under_The_Rose]

I have been with my SO for 4 years now. I dumped my ex for him and now here we are. I saw my ex the other night. He is friends with 2 of my friends who I went out with and came along. Normally he can barely even look me in the eye, but we spoke, were joking around etc. He called me by my nickname, which was weird (just the first 3 letters of my name, but still only he calls me that). I am in love with my boyfriend, but damn I miss the ex sometimes Mainly just talking to him. He was my first and so I still have this connection with him. Think that is why I handled breaking up with him so badly.

 

I hate myself for thinking about him. My bf would probably break up with me if he knew. I know that if I was with the ex now, I would of course want my current boyfriend back. Bad cycle.

 

Don't quite know what I am after, maybe a good slap to get me back into reality.

Edited February 18, 2008 by Under_The_Rose

[Cathamaroo]

Love the one you're with!

 

I, too, still have feelings for my ex! I haven't spoken to him in... 5 years!! I just know in my heart that he still loves me, and whenever something goes wrong in my current relationship, I can't help but to think about my ex, and how he wouldn't have done that or said that or whatever.

 

The point is, though, that I left him for several reasons. Although there are still emotions there, and likely always will be, we did break up for a reason! Just try and remember why you guys broke up. Those problems would probably arise again!

 

Once I realized I had a huge crush on one of my guy friends while I had a boyfriend. I broke up with my boyfriend because I didn't think it was fair to him, and I had realized that I wasn't in love with him anymore if I were to even consider feeling that way about someone else.

 

Well, I hung out with my guy friend, and realized that it was just play thinking, my feelings weren't as strong as I thought they were. I never even told my friend that I had a crush, we just hung out and flirted a bit, and him being my friend was everything I wanted.

 

 

I think it's healthy to fantasize sometimes, as long as you can keep yourself grounded! You need to realize what you love so much in your current relationship, and build upon that. It sounds like you may already be in a great relationship, try not to lose something great by going back to something that you already know what will go wrong.