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lusting and holding out

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lusting and holding out

ive worked with this guy for almost 4 yrs , 21/2 yrs ago some thing about him attracted me . ive we've tried to fight our feeling for each other . i'am married and he is living with a girl. and since we have the no dating co workers policy where we work we have tried to stay away from each other . my marriage isnt all that great and hes been there for me.but now it to the point where i cant eat, sleep or think straight . all day long i 'm thinking of him sexually. i find myself when i do sleep dreaming of having hot passionate sex in every way that there can be.since his first kiss and believe me it was so passionate and full of heat that i find myself just looking at his lips all day long. we had planned a little getaway but i couldnt do it at the last monent. i guess you could say i was scared. my question is should i just sleep with him and keep it quiet? or transfer to another job. you know the ole saying out of sight out of mind . this man can just stand by me and i get hot.he only has to looked at me and im finished for the day. i can't think at all or function . i really need some advice on this .

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You are definitely lusting for this man from all you have stated in your post. Your marriage isn't that great as you have said and he fills a void. It is convenient that he is in the same work place as you, but, as you said, you are completely unable to function due to his presence.

 

Just how far gone is your marriage? Is it retrievable? Are you having lusting fantasies about this man to fill a void that you percieve in your own marriage?

 

This guy knows you are having trouble in your marriage and that makes you vulnerable to his returned sexual advances towards you. Please do not fool yourself into believing that he will leave his girlfriend for you. It is always possible, but highly unlikely unless he is not happy with her as well, and you ONLY know what he tells you. Believe me, I have been there! Also, he is more likely to stay in his present situation should you have a child or children and he does not (or even if he does ... it still makes a difference).

 

As far as satisfying yourself sexually with this man, do NOT do it while you are co-workers .... if it does not work out or comes to an end when one or the other of you are NOT ready ... it will be pure hell ... trust me on that one, too. Therefore, you would need to leave your place of work and gain employment elsewhere before entertaining the thought of having a fling with this dude. And remember, it would be totally sexual ... THAT IS ALL! It is difficult to keep things that way in an affair as emotional and attatchment issues do usually arrise .... THAT is what usually ends the affair.

 

Also, should you decide to have an affair with him or anyone else, use protection against all STD out their such as AIDS. This is really serious business we are talking here, woman!

 

My advice is to see where your marriage has gone wrong. If abuse, drugs, alcohol or any of the like are involved, end the marriage ........ RUN!!!! There are shelters that can care for you and your children should you have any as well as find you housing (unless you get your home and settlement in the divorse), gainfull employment and other help getting back on your feet.

 

I have covered a lot of ground here as you gave little information. My main intent is to give you one hell of a lot of food for thought.

 

Best of luck. D.

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The grass is always greener over the sepic tank.

 

Don't ruin your life and your marriage over lust for a coworker. If you don't want to work with your marriage, then, for heaven's sake, end the marriage. THEN, if you still feel that overwhelming lust for your coworker...

 

As it is, you are headed for heartbreak.

 

Look before you leap.

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Lust all you want but please don't go there. Lust doesn't last. You have too much to lose. Neither one of you are available. Don't pursue this. Fantasize all you want but think of the consequences if you act on it. Wanting what you can't have? Keep telling yourself it probably isn't that good... If it's passionate sex your in need of, turn up the music, turn down the lights, and turn on your spouse. There's a reason for the no dating coworkers policy and this is it... (you don't need the chaos, and neither does your spouse, and neither does your boss).

 

ive worked with this guy for almost 4 yrs , 21/2 yrs ago some thing about him attracted me . ive we've tried to fight our feeling for each other . i'am married and he is living with a girl. and since we have the no dating co workers policy where we work we have tried to stay away from each other . my marriage isnt all that great and hes been there for me.but now it to the point where i cant eat, sleep or think straight . all day long i 'm thinking of him sexually. i find myself when i do sleep dreaming of having hot passionate sex in every way that there can be.since his first kiss and believe me it was so passionate and full of heat that i find myself just looking at his lips all day long. we had planned a little getaway but i couldnt do it at the last monent. i guess you could say i was scared. my question is should i just sleep with him and keep it quiet? or transfer to another job. you know the ole saying out of sight out of mind . this man can just stand by me and i get hot.he only has to looked at me and im finished for the day. i can't think at all or function . i really need some advice on this .
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If you're this involved with someone else, why are you still married? Why have the vows you took lost thier meaning? Don't you respect your husband enough to not humiliate him this way? Obviously I dont know your situation, your husband could be a complete a**h*** for all I know. But shouldn't you end the marriage before you create more conflict in your life? Maybe you are just attracted to your coworker because things are so sour at home. Maybe you want your husband to find out so that you will have a real reason to end the marraige.

ive worked with this guy for almost 4 yrs , 21/2 yrs ago some thing about him attracted me . ive we've tried to fight our feeling for each other . i'am married and he is living with a girl. and since we have the no dating co workers policy where we work we have tried to stay away from each other . my marriage isnt all that great and hes been there for me.but now it to the point where i cant eat, sleep or think straight . all day long i 'm thinking of him sexually. i find myself when i do sleep dreaming of having hot passionate sex in every way that there can be.since his first kiss and believe me it was so passionate and full of heat that i find myself just looking at his lips all day long. we had planned a little getaway but i couldnt do it at the last monent. i guess you could say i was scared. my question is should i just sleep with him and keep it quiet? or transfer to another job. you know the ole saying out of sight out of mind . this man can just stand by me and i get hot.he only has to looked at me and im finished for the day. i can't think at all or function . i really need some advice on this .
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